step into LSS's mind.

[LifeStandsStill]

So, I've been browsing through Artists' Corner and realized I'd like to have a thread on here to show you what I see art as. I see art in many ways, and this thread will have my short stories, poems, and photography. There will be a great deal of writing, since I love to write. (Lol) I would post my stuff up right now, but I need to get to sleep and get rid of this terrible headache. =) LSS

[LifeStandsStill]

Ok so, apparently I've lost all of my photos I have taken over the years. Which sucks super hard. But I do have one that I took not too long ago... I also need to search my room for my poetry book. I've also decided a new new years resolution : Get Organized. It'd make life much easier. This is a smaller version. *runs fah fah away to find poetry book.*

[LifeStandsStill]

I searched my computer and still haven't found any of my photos. I searched my room and still haven't found my poetry book. But I wrote a poem today. Here goes... January 10th, 2008 Love. There are some pains That you cannot physically see Like a headache that hurts your brain And toothaches, That are just as painful as migraines But there's another pain you see That people just like you and me Experience at least once in our lives This pain will make you go insane Will make you cry This pain is the worst of them all And it all begins when you start to fall For something that can change your life Someone who makes you realize you're alive And then in the blink of an eye, here comes the knife Busting through your flesh Gasping for your breath Piercing your heart You look for an answer But you find yourself tangled in lies Why does this happen Perhaps the world will never know It leaves you pondering Leaves you wondering Thinking of how much it's like a t.v. show =)

[LifeStandsStill]

[EDIT] to make revisions. Notes to myself will look like this. A story I started writing last year... That I've decided to start working on again. As of now. Unfortunately I can't seem to find my other two stories that were saved on my computer. Note:This isn't a finished copy. Not even close to finished. I'm Not Going Insane. She just couldn't take it anymore. All the people around her looking at her as if she was just a big not-funny joke. But she kept telling herself that when it happens, she'll be the only one to know what to do, and it'll show them and put them in their right place. Casey Miller, sixteen years old, and standing strong. This is the girl we're talking about, if you didn't already figure it out. She use to have the heart of an angel, that is until people thought she was going mentally insane. You see, a few weeks ago, Casey had a dream. A weird, scary, life threatening dream. She thought it was nothing and just forgot about it. Just like any other normal person on Earth would, right? But she shouldn't have... This dream was very important and now the "power" was trying to give her signs on how to remember the dream. Casey was sitting in her desk at class, trying to finish her stupid math work that she thought was a complete and total waste of everyones time. IT'S NOT A COMPLETE AND TOTAL WASTE OF TIME, CASEY. Casey shot up in her seat, gasping for breath. "Who said that?!" She screamed desperately. Her whole class turned to look at her. There were a few head shakes, a few whispers and then everyone turned back to their work. Casey had her eyebrows raised and her face looked like she was about to have a nervous breakdown, right there in class. She looked over at the clock, which was right beside the door where you enter and exit the classroom. "Only two more hours." She said under her breath, as she looked at a little boy standing in the doorway. She looked at the child, with a confused look on her face. He was staring right back at her. Casey shook her head and looked down at her math work. She looked back up again and the boy was gone... On the way home from school, Casey was sitting in her usual seat on the bus. The bus driver had pulled up to a train going by, and waited while the train was almost done holding up the driver from driving. Casey looked out the window, a little boy was riding a tricycle and stopped right beside the bus. He looked at Casey. Casey's eyes got big and her jaw dropped. She stopped looking out the window and decided to rest her eyes. That couldn't possibly be the same little boy, she thought. OH, BUT I AM THE SAME LITTLE BOY. Casey opened her eyes and looked beside her. She screamed and had her back towards the window. She felt as if she couldn't breathe. The little boy was sitting right beside her. The bus driver looked back at her and put the bus in park. She ran back to Casey and asked her if she was alright. "NO! I'M NOT! CAN'T YOU SEE THIS LITTLE BOY??" Casey gasped. The bus driver frowned, "Dear, what on Earth are you talking about? There's nobody there..." The bus driver ran back to her seat and grabbed her cell phone. Casey looked around frantically at all the faces looking at her. She noticed the bus driver dialing a number on her cell phone, and that was the last thing she saw before she fainted. Casey woke up in the hospital, with her parents staring over her like she was about to commit a serious crime. "Oh, honey, you're awake! I've been so worried about you since I got that phone call." Mrs. Williams said. Casey's father looked at her in the eyes, while he was right in her face, saying, "Casey, are you feeling okay?" Casey looked seriously confused, "What? I'm fine, where am I? And what phone call, Mom?" Mrs. Williams had a worried look to her, and hesitatingly told Casey what happened on the bus... "Casey, now don't worry, everything is going to be perfectly fine, okay? Yesterday when you were riding the bus home from school, you were having hallucinations and basically freaking out in front of everyone.. and then.. y-y-you fainted and everyone thought you were d-d-d-dead." Mrs. Williams said starting to cry. Mr. Williams held his wife and ran his hands through her hair. He turned to Casey, "If it wasn't for your bus driver, Miss Cranery, you could very well be.... dead." Mr. Williams shut his eyes and took a deep breath. Casey was stunned. She couldn't remember any of this. She looked up to the flickering florescent light above her, and closed her eyes. Her parents were about to leave the room, so the doctors could run some tests on her. As Casey looked towards her parents walking out the door, she screamed in fear. She couldn't remember what happened yesterday, but she could damn well remember that little boy. "NOOO!!!" Casey screamed, "Go away!!!" She started a mixture of crying and screaming, which the whole C-Wing Hall of the Hospital could hear. The doctors ran to her and injected her with a needle to calm her down. The last thing she saw before she went to sleep, was her parents crying. The last thing she heard was the doctor telling her parents something, that would change her families life forever... Casey was out cold. But it was a 'good out cold'. She was getting rest that she desperately needed. "We're going to have to send her to St. Coleman's, I know it might hurt you, but she is not fit to be in the public eye, Mr. and Mrs. Williams. If things clear up in two months, she may be released. But if they continue, they will test her, and in six months give her diagnosis." Said Dr. Ferns. Mrs. Williams jaw dropped, and she looked at her husband with tears in her eyes, "They cannot do this to us, my Casey is perfectly fine Marhsall." she sobbed. They left the room and went into the waiting room. Mr. and Mrs. Williams soon fell asleep, anxiously waiting for their beloved daughter to wake up. Three Days Later. Casey had been doing well for the past three days. She slept often, and was only awoken to eat and take her medicine. When she was finally back on her schedule, she was informed by the doctors, of what was going to happen. "Casey, we have contacted St. Coleman's Institution for the Mentally Disabled down in South Crestinson, and they have provided an order to take you out of public education schooling. Next Monday, you will be transfered there, and stay there for awhile." Explained Nurse Dodgens. Casey was in a shock of awe as she heard the words coming out of this persons mouth. She looked down, and then looked back up at Nurse Dodgens, "Why?" Casey asked. "Well, you see honey, hmm." Nurse Dodgens didn't know how to explain the answer to Casey, and looked to Mr. and Mrs. Williams for help. "Casey, baby, they just want to do some tests and see if you are mentally and physically able to be in public." Mrs. Williams told her daughter. "Ok." Casey replied. After Casey had went to sleep, Dr. Ferns talked with her parents, about the condition Casey might be in, "We're thinking she has something that deals with depression, or, our other theory, which we consider more, is that she just has hallucinations... but the deal is, is that most of the time when someone has hallucinations, they have an illness, and this is why it is a must that she attends at St. Coleman's for awhile." Exclaimed Dr. Ferns. Mrs. Williams shook her head and turned away. Mr. Williams nodded, and thanked the doctor, and said that they will go pack some of Casey's belongings. MONDAY. "Casey, c'mon hun, wake up so you can get a shower." Mrs. Williams said enthusiastically. Casey rolled over in the hospital bed, slamming the pillow over her face. Her mother could barely make out what she said, "Mooooom. I don't wanna go there. That place is for crazy people, and I'm not crazy!" Casey said exhaustingly through her pillow, making the words come out muffled. "I know, Case, I know. But since we know you're not crazy, you'll only be there for two months and it might be good to get a break from school." Mrs. Williams tried to encourage her. Casey was furious, "GOD! Can't you get the picture? When I go back to school, wait.. no, IM NOT GOING BACK TO SCHOOL, at least not that one for crying out loud. If I go back there, I will then be known as that girl who got sent away to St. Coleman's after fainting on the bus from seeing a "little boy". I'm telling you, I cannot go back to, nor will I ever go back to Werlin Ives High, Mom! I'd be better off dead than going back there." "Don't you EVER say such a thing, Casey. Now get yourself up and get in that shower, NOW!" Mrs. Williams said in a motherly tone that all kids in the world, knew very well. Casey sat up in her bed, "Ugh. Fine. What time is it anyway?" she asked, "It's five thirty. The bus will be here in an hour to pick you up, so you need to move fast and get something to eat." Mrs. Williams told her. "Ok, but you should know, that I really don't want to go." Casey said sadly. "Yeah, I know." Mrs. Williams said with a sympathetic tone and look on her face. Casey blended the perfect water with just the right mixtures of hot and cold, and stepped in the weird looking hospital shower. Feeling ultimate relaxation as the water ran down her, she thought to herself, I could stand here forever. She washed her hair and her body, shaved, and got out of the shower. She towel-dried her hair, and put it in a pony tail while she did some plucking to her eyebrows. Cut out some unnecessary details. She cleaned out her ears, and then started putting on her make up. Casey never wore a lot of make up. Because honestly, she didn't even need it. She was a beautiful girl, with very unique features about her. She put on mascara and some eyeliner, and then brushed her teeth, and then used some Crest mouthwash. After that, she put on some chap stick, and towel-dried her hair one more time before getting out of her robe, and putting on a white tank top, dark ripped blue jeans, socks, and her favorite black heels. She walked back to her hospital room and brushed her amazingly straight and shiny black hair. "I'm all ready to go! Ma, what time is it?" She shouted. "It's six thirteen, did you eat yet?" Mrs. Williams called back. Casey cursed under her breath, no, she didn't eat yet. She walked, well actually she jogged, down towards the hospital's cafeteria, and grabbed a plate of eggs and bacon with those round tater tots. She ate quickly, and realized she still had to make sure she had everything together, and that her parents brought the stuff she told them to bring. And, she'd have to brush her teeth again. She threw away her left overs, which was now garbage, and ran back to her hospital room. She looked around for a clock, "Crap! Six twenty one. The bus is probably already here!" She did a quick search through her bags, brushed her teeth, and managed to find some winter fresh gum. She looked back at the clock that now read six twenty-six, and hurried out the door to find herself running right into her mother and father. "Why are you in such a rush?" Her mother asked. "Well lets see, it's six twenty-six and the bus leaves at six thirty, and I'm still not down by the bus! Duh!" She said sarcastically. "Oh! Honey, no no no, the bus gets here at six thirty, not leaves at that time, and besides, the St. Coleman's bus is only picking up you, so it won't leave until it knows you're on." Mrs. Williams laughed with a smile. Casey was angry. She did all that rushing for practically nothing. "Well, by the time we get down there, the bus will already be there, so lets go." Mr. Williams said. Casey and her mother agreed, and they walked to the bus. "Ok... here I go." Casey said looking at her parents, scared to death. "You'll be fine, we'll call you to talk to you, and you will be able to call us all the time, and here's some cash and a card." Mrs. Williams said handing the "gifts" to Casey. Casey's eyes got huge. "Mom.. you just handed me a credit card and three hundred dollars" She said. Mr. Williams smiled, "We know hun, St. Coleman's has a special teens center there, where you will be around kids your age, and they have special privileges where they get to go shopping and stuff." Her father said. "Well, how much can I spend on the card?" She asked. "We put 300 dollars in the account every month, and I packed the information and everything about the credit card, and a St. Coleman's brochure in a folder in your bags." Her father told her. "AW, thanks Dad, and thanks Mom, I love you and I'm going to miss you so much." She said hugging them each with a kiss to the cheek. Her parents had never given her a large amount of money before, but she figured it was suppose to make her feel better about going to St. Coleman's. She walked up the bus stairs and found a seat in the back. "Well, maybe it won't be so bad." Casey thought aloud. Ride to St. Coleman's Casey decided she would look at the brochure for St.Coleman's. She had heard about it, but really didn't know that she would be doing special activities that would include going out of the Institute. She found the folder her father told her about, and found the brochure. It had fancy writing on it, which made it seem like a summer camp rather than a Mental Institution. She read it. 'Here at St. Coleman's Institution for the Mentally Disabled TEEN CENTER, we provide the teenagers with ultimate care. We treat everyone with respect, just like we would want to be treated. We have a wonderful staff. Some have been here for a long time, and some have been here a short while, but all in all our staff is considered the best in the USA. The Teen Center section includes the following.' That was as far as I had got with that story. I plan on continuing it.

[LifeStandsStill]

Should I? Should I turn left? Should I go right? Should I step forward? Should I lean back? Should I stay asleep? Should I wake up? Should I never sleep? Should I doubt my goals? Should I believe in something that seems not real? Should I cry? Should I pray? Should I love forever? Should I love never? Should I shout out in the rain? Should I tell people about my personal pain? Should I be distant from others? Should I lie to myself to make life easier? Should I act like I'm ok? Should I cry over another? Should I hang my head in shame? Should I point and blame? Should I try and make things better? Everything just seems like a big old game, so Should I just say screw this, it's whatever? I don't really have much to say about this one....

[LifeStandsStill]

I'm in a really weird writing mood... Untitled. January 12th, 2008 You never know When the rain will come It's shadowed clouds Draping over you Bringing upon a frown Onto a face that should not deny The love of the skies Realize your gift Let it set in You're one in The World But you're smaller than one in The Space Do not show your pain on your face Gloomy days can lead to different things But don't let it lead To a trapped soul in a diamond ring. This poem is dedicated to my father...

[Jdeadevil]

Untitled. January 12th, 2008 You never know When the rain will come It's shadowed clouds Draping over you Bringing upon a frown Onto a face that should not deny The love of the skies Realize your gift Let it set in You're one in The World But you're smaller than one in The Space Do not show your pain on your face Gloomy days can lead to different things But don't let it lead To a trapped soul in a diamond ring. [/COLOR] That's nice. ^_^

[LifeStandsStill]

Thanks Jdead n__n