I couldn't think of a place to put this, but this section seemed closest.

I'm desperately wanting to retrieve memories from my past. Something happened, in my life, from at least the ages of 7-10 and I want to know what. I say that only because both my brother (4 years younger) and I had severe night terrors. We were living in Puerto Rico and my parents fought violently (mom threw a knife at dad for hanging up the phone when she was talking to her mom). The Military Police came out at least once. And then I was sent away to live with my grandmother for a few months.

I have other strange tidbits of memory:
>I was about 2 years old and in a crib with a baby boy. The curtain had fallen into the crib and there was a butter knife on the windowsil (sp) and then in the crib. One of my baby brothers died from SIDS but because of that memory I don't know if I've secretly blamed myself for his death or something.
>I saw a girl eat glass at a fountain in a park when I was about 4 and I never saw her again.
>A hobo (?) in the woods behind the same park said he'd give me some money if I did something (??) When I got home I was excited and told my mom and she slapped me. Because I was excited, I doubt I was abused. But why did my mom slap me? Better yet, my mom SWEARS that event never took place. I was about 4 years old.
>I was a baby in the front seat of a vehicle. An older man was driving. He had to put on his brakes quickly and I ended up on the floor crying.

The most confusing thing about my memories is that I was supposedly kidnapped, along with my younger sister, by her father and his brother when I was about 3 or 4. I was held in the back of a van at gunpoint, and yet I have no memory at all of that event.

I've been a self-injurer since I was about 7 years old. Self-injurers, stereo-typically were abused, if not sexually abused, as young children. But that's not always the case. Sometimes children become SI-ers for other reasons, as in to cope with an abundance of chaos (my most likely reason because chaos is my major trigger to this day).
Last Thursday I three times cut myself near my hip and they were deep enough for stitches though I took care of them myself without any.

This seriously needs to stop. I figured the easiest way to do so is to confront the demons (so to speak) that drove me to SI to begin with.
But how? My dreams aren't helping. So how about self-hypnosis?

Sorry so long. If anyone has any info that may help, even if it's not about self-hypnosis, I would greatly appreciate it.