Sailing the Noosphere

1. I'm reading (Failed RC) an advertisement for some sort of new pen and paper RPG. The class system is based around kitchen tools, with knives, can openers, nutcrackers, and even rolling pins getting mentions. Each of them has a fanciful history based on a real-world group; I think the nutcrackers are Russian mobsters?

2. I'm traveling in Canada with some friends and take a lunch break. I get very angry, as the only available shops are two Burger Kings on either side of the street, and both of them are selling a mixture of disgusting seafood instead of burgers.

3. I'm with my family on a shopping trip to Wal-Mart. We buy several things, including a ceramic piggy bank, a cute figurine, and a diabetes tester for dogs. All failed RCs, of course.