joeseph

1. coffee stolen
2. olivia munn and counterfeit money

i didn't sleep very well, i had a lot of energy going to bed and i definitely think it carried through into my dreams. lots of tension. i've been thinking a lot about being the "alpha male" -- you are the prize -- so i figure that all that energy has to go somewhere. sleep isn't really a good place for it.

the first dream involved getting breakfast. i woke up to go to the bathroom and decided to make some eggs. i was in a room with my sister. the toilet was right there, with no door, but i figured it wasn't a big deal because it was down the hallway a little bit. i'm holding 3 raw eggs on a little plate. the plate is way too small for the eggs. i try to put them on the burner, but it spills EVERYWHERE. i sop some up with my hands, but jesus christ, raw eggs are so gross. they start to smell and it's horrible.

i later meet with up Bobby Scar, and i explain how much i hate eggs. we're gonna go to macdonald's for breakfast. even though i try to eat healthy, i figure OK, that's fine. i can get a hash brown and a cup of coffee and maybe a sausage mcmuffin to go with my eggs. i am literally SO CHEAP. i can't not eat these eggs that are half-cooked that are waiting for me at home (that make me want to puke thinking about it in the dream). i get two large cups of coffee, and we bring them back to Austin's house. i go and do something and he has STOLEN MY COFFEES and fucked them up with cream and sugar! I am so irate about this! What the fuck?!! Does he even know how hard it is to nourish myself? the pains that i take when it comes to spending money and putting things into my body? and here he is with this stupid sense of entitlement, just because he can't find HIS coffee from macdonald's after looking 20 seconds that it's OK to take mine. I get back inside after he leaves (he drives the prius out on the way to work and i walk behind a tree so he doesn't see me) and the neighbors are here. I'm so angry; I rail on him and let him have it. It's just not fair, when he has "something" and I have absolutely "NOTHING" (wahhh). Chalk it up to the emotional baggage I carry deep within

Second dream: very convoluted sci-fi plot involving dogs in the porno industry. The whole corporation dissolves, and I find myself in a multi-tiered cafe that used to be owned by them. The collapse has driven the crowds out, but the owners are trying very hard to give the people good service. Let's show 'em what they're missing out on. So the owner (someone from the coffee shop) gets Marie back on the espresso machine. She starts steaming milk. Very odd association, that she would work here. I think "Hey, this is something that I can help out with," but immediately "NAHH FUCK THAT, I DON'T WANNA DO THAT!" So I go into the arcade. They have DDR machines! DDR Extreme. I want to see if Dimitri is there, and play DDR with him.

Lapse in continuity here, though I know they are connected. Someone calls the owner and starts to follow him around. It's actually a secret organization of nuns, and the head nun is calling using a voice filter to seem like a man. They're a futuristic organization. They start to come up with all these hare-brained schemes to capture us, like sending out a decoy car while they wait to take the real one that we're in. Nothing works though. (Family guy imagery in this part, during the demonstrations of their plans. Computer imagery.) Zoom into the car, where it's me, my sister, jessica from work, another girl, and olivia munn. We drive around (actually all of the girls are interchangeable except for me and olivia munn... those asians, man) and we have a suitcase full of counterfeit money. The other model girl says "yeah i made sure to take a cool half Mil for myself." I try to get a good looking hundred dollar bill, except olivia munn keeps handing me shitty bills that are ripped or foreign money, which is too small. Eventually I settle on a fifty dollar bill. Stingy. Plus I don't wanna get implicated here. We drive to a spot to meet someone, and she begins to tear her shirt in a very calculated fashion, tucking it up around her boobs to show her stomach. I let her know that I know what she's doing. "I can do THIS" I say, and show my muscles.... biceps. "Yeah that's pretty good, what do you do?" Oh, a little this, a little that. Depends... rock climbing or weightlifting for strength, sometimes I just want to look good and I'll do pullups.... blah blah. We stop the car, but it's in a sketchy area. "What the fuck, you can't surf here. This is a horrible spot." There are black dudes walking around. Jessica gets out to ask for directions or something, and I subtly move the car. The parking brake is in a really uncomfortable spot; there are clothes or plastic bins or something underneath the seat. "It's hard to drive with the park brake pressing into my DICK" i say, getting out of the car. That's where the dream ends.

Kind of uninspired, really. Uninspired dreaming, but I figured it was still worth it to write it down. Feelings of inadequacy and dissatisfaction. Nausea, with the eggs, and uneasiness. What do I get out of being so stingy? Not much, these dreams seem to say.