side notes

Last night I had another one of those vivid recurring dreams. I was with my family and we were driving on the top of a bridge way up high overlooking what could have been the entrance to Portland or some city. Someone had always wanted to take this trip (and it was a tradition) because they have huge pipes that people go into to shoot out into the water. It always scares me when I'm being told that it's "fun" and everyone's doing it. I am someone who often remembers their dreams, and they are always strange. My dreams are like puzzles, video games, mysteries, adventure stories. Today I drew some pictures of my dream and felt creative for the first time in a while.



I can't remember much else, other than I know that a lot happened and I can barely piece it all together. I have another story/life going on in these dreams. A whole sleeping dictionary of life mish mashed into surreal states and curiosities. I don't know what this place is, but it always makes me in awe because of the heights, it's like a world intersecting another one, the invisible dreamwalkers who ride above the tops of the bridge, while ordinary sleepers are mindlessly driving their cars across to world below us. The height is infinite, and the cars go fast without fear of falling. The rules of the dreamworld depend on faith and suspension of rationality.



I have confronted dream characters who act like the ones from the movie Inception. Often indifferent, but one man and I were standing around talking like ordinary people. And I told him that if it was a dream I should try to break through and he said, “I wouldn't if I were you.” I said, “Since this is a dream I can just jump off this height and I won't get hurt...I'll simply fly away”
I ended up breaking through and these agents in black suits came after me, constantly in these dreams they chased me down. I would cause trouble sometimes, but usually I would be in the real world and I could simply lift off and fly away. Maybe this could truly happen in the real world, maybe there is an intersection between the two. A secret bridge.



I remember one of my more vivid encounters when I woke myself up and began breaking through. A giant tree monster chased me through decay and time, and a neighbor and her kids that were made of wax or plastic. The mother turned into an angry beast and woke up the monster tree when I told her that she was made of wax, and went all demonic and her children...I don't remember what happened to the children..but I escaped and flew away over the rooftops to a new place...a new hideout.
There are the dreams where I've supposedly woken the beast. That or the dream guardians are new age fanatics, sually after smoking pot, someone yells "You've woken the beast." this happened once in real life. Anyways, the first dream was during these other freaky dreams, I think I was taking Trazadon at the time and it was making me delirious.



I remember I was on the edge of a dark swamp, and i saw a vampire who wanted me to stay away and a friend inside who wanted me to come back, well when the vampire came to talk to me I panicked and ran. He told me not to, but it was too late because I made it to the center of the earth where a giant Ouroborus snake monster thing ate me but didn't destroy me.



then I came back, cause I guess it spit me out. I saw an Agent who looked sorta like Obama who was dressed in a black suite, he walked down this path and said, "Don't you see what you've done Gabby, tsk tsk, you've woken the beast." and he seemed to be checking his watch. "Now it's just a matter of time!" and then the whole place rippled and imploded. Then this happened in the future too, the invisible beasts were everywhere I assume humanity was dwindling, and the roads were covered in sheets of ice.



Spider machines patrolled for bio-electrical activity, and sensed me...but I escaped...and then other future worlds with all sorts of things happening. Alternate universes...no creepy aliens yet but I have seen fairies and mythical beings of protection. Well I had another you've woken the beast dream, only this one was random...I was going to a beach party but the beast was in the water...and the boat sank or something, which is freaky cuz I was invited to a beach/boat type party with the same characters as in the dream. I don't think I'll go to this one. My dreams also equate BDSM with mind control, go figure.



I'm only now realizing a good portion of my life has been spent in a sort of unconscious dream world, more often before I took the medications to keep me sane. Because really I could enter these dreams, and there'd be no distinction. I've had premonitions, sometimes I wonder if these people I dream about I just made up in my head!