WaterDreamer

This one's been in my mind the last few weeks, so I thought it might be therapeutic to post it. Everyone has a worst fear, and mine is being raped.
Thank God it's never happened to me, but this dream left me temporarily convinced that it had... so it was kind of upsetting, to say the least.

Can't remember how this dream began - maybe it's better that way. The dream had its own back story: In it, I knew it was Wednesday (it really was IWL), and that meant it had been exactly one week since I was raped (again, in the dream!). I always seem to have a desire to go all vigilante on frightening DCs, so not surprisingly I decided to go seek revenge on my attacker. Obviously not alone, so I brought my friend Michelle with me. Somehow I had figured out that a particular area of the tile floor in a vacant building (almost like a very shallow pool, only 1-2 ft deep) covered a passageway to an underground area, and that was where we'd find him. We opened up the tile panel and descended. The next thing I remember is us frantically trying to get back out, pursued by my attacker. I was pulling Michelle out of the passage, and I saw a knife pierce her sneaker, but we got away.

I figured she was only cut if anything, but suddenly it's a couple days later, at night, and after I walk up to Michelle's front door and am let in by her family, I realize she died (from the cut, somehow). I instantly offer condolences to her family, and I'm in shock.

So then I go back down the secret passage to pursue this twisted man, alone. Despite being underground, there are windows up high, with daylight coming in. The underground portion consists of halls connecting large rooms, with nothing really in them. Everything is made of plain gray concrete. I somehow figure out this used to be a school. I think I even see a desk somewhere. I find at least one old piece of paper with writing, and I realize that this is proof of something else I had been trying to prove about the school, some sort of mystery surrounding it (didn't have a damn thing to do with revenge on my rapist, but some sort of secondary mission, maybe left over from a prior dream that night). I don't find the villain, but instead focus on this mystery solving. Then my mom comes around a corner, just as I'm pissing myself (not from fear, I just decided to pee in my clothes LOL), so I try to shoo her away and babble something about what I'm trying to do.

This is the weirdest part: As I began to slowly drift into wakefulness, I was having "dream flashbacks" to the rape itself. It was so strange, like my dreaming mind was creating a memory of something that didn't actually happen. Thankfully they weren't terribly vivid, but it was highly disturbing. Consequently, as I became more awake, I was trying to figure out if it was real. It got to the point where I was sitting up in bed thinking, "Was I really raped last week? Is this a repressed memory?" I was genuinely uncertain for a couple minutes. Once I was fully awake, I was never so happy to realize I had just been dreaming!

Early on in this dream I notice a new Blockbuster is being constructed very close to where I live (IWL all 4 of our nearest Blockbusters have recently closed or are in the process); I'm pleasantly surprised and assume this is to make up for the ridiculous mass closings. At some point someone is murdered; I seem to recall it was a child or someone relatively young. Next thing I know I'm standing on the top step, under an overhang, outside what I assume is a courthouse. It's daytime, looks like afternoon sunlight. There are lawyers and perhaps a few other random people standing near me. Then I see the mother of the murder victim walking up the steps. I notice she is Indian. As I look at her, I ponder how she, and others like her, can possibly manage to cope with their child's murder. Then the murderer arrives, I believe I actually make eye contact with him. He moves parallel to the bottom step at first, to my left, away from us before coming up the steps. Kinda strange, I notice he's wearing a suit but is not escorted by any guards or anything, I get the impression he's just been dropped off in a black car. He's a middle aged black man, his skin is an ashy gray color.

I can't remember actually entering the "courthouse", but at some point I find myself on the inside of the building, and it's a much larger version of Kinder Care, the daycare center I went to when I was young IWL (it sucked ass!!). It's more like a school actually; through the large windows I can see other buildings on the campus. There are as many people milling around as in an airport; I can't recall how many children, I know there are some adults. Suddenly I'm on my phone with my mom, and she tells me to find the west building. I tell her I have no idea which way is west on the campus, so I'll have to ask somebody. I see a number of adults in green uniform shirts, I assume they work there. But that's the last thing I can really remember.

I found myself getting out of bed in my dark bedroom, starting toward the door. I happened to notice that the red display on the digital clock to my left is much more dim than usual, and I also noticed that something on my right is unusually bright, a white light (didn't look right at it, in the dream I assumed it was another alarm clock, but it's not there IWL). I told myself, "I must be dreaming!" and I instantly remembered my intention to try to stabilize, take my time and anchor myself to the dream, since I had trouble moving my dream body in my prior LDs. But I didn't find this to be a problem in this one, maybe because I was moving as I became lucid, who knows. I thought of looking at my digital clock directly to see the phenomenon of numbers being strange or mutating, but for some stupid reason I only glanced at it once, and I think it said 2 something am. Wish I had looked back. I should have stopped and taken in my entire dream bedroom, but for some reason resumed my original plan to go to the door and open it. I guess since I was moving easily, I didn't want to stop. I have trouble remembering after this, I know it ended shortly after. I believe I wanted to talk to my mom, maybe tell her I was LDing, and found her in the dining room outside the hall.