Was hoping I could get some help with a dream I had..

[ManEatinCatfish]

This is my first post, and I will do my best to provide all the information I can about the dream I had last night. I'm not necessarily spooked about it, but I want to be able to understand it better and be able to help myself grow more. I'll start with the events leading up to going to sleep, the dream itself, then I guess some information about me.. Here we go. So I was laying in bed, and had a candle lit and was reading a book waiting for my laundry to finish. I can hear the dryer and washer from my bed. After I finished reading the book (The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, and I literally had just finished the last page), I blew out the candle (lavender and vanilla scented) and put on some relaxing rain-sound app I just decided to download on my phone. I normally find it very difficult to sleep without any noise, and I'm trying to break away from having music constantly playing via headphones when I'm sleeping. Sooner than I expected, I feel asleep. I thought I woke up, and sat up to go change my laundry because I didn't hear the dryer anymore. The room looked exactly as it did before. Same amount of lighting from the window, everything was in the place just as it was. When I sat up, I saw myself still laying down in my bed. As I turned my legs over the side of the bed, my hips would have still be aligned with my body, in a way that I suppose would suggest that I was still attached, but not in the exact same position. The direction I faced was towards my closet, which I never really close the door to. As I looked up and tried to stand, I wasn't able to stand. I could move my arms and legs, but could not actually get up. When I looked up, I saw a skeleton, more specifically a skull wrapped in a black shroud (sort of what the typical grim-reaper looks like) come out of the closet and stare at me. After we made eye contact, as soon as I tried to stand up, the skull began to scream mercilessly at me, as if to scare me. Well it did. I was unable to scream or talk. And it continued to scream at me until I laid back down. Once I laid down, and looked over at the closet, I could still see the skull, but it had retreated into the closet, but never stopped looking at me. I looked at my ceiling, closed my eyes, and shortly there after, woke back up. At least I think so. I didn't get out of bed. I didn't sit up. I rolled over to look at my phone, noticed some time had passed since I stopped reading the book, and decided to go to sleep, despite what just happened. I turned off the sounds it was making, and placed it on the opposite side of my bed on the night stand. Some time later, I woke up again. The same exact thing happened. Room looked exactly the same. Sat up, saw myself, went to stand, and immediately the skull came flying out of the closet, screaming immediately this time though, not waiting for me to try and get up. It almost looked more angry than the first time. Still unable to stand or scream, I laid back down and stared at the ceiling until I feel asleep. This time though, the skull did not retreat into the closet, but stayed next to the bed, looking angry at me the whole time. I woke up again. Sat up, saw nothing. Everything was the way it should be. I didn't see myself anymore, nothing was screaming.. It was actually too quiet for my liking.. So I laid back down and passed out almost immediately after I hit the pillow. The next time I opened my eyes, the room appeared hazy, and dark.. Not necessarily black, but dark. I could feel something glaring at me, almost as if it was waiting for some movement. Like a predator stalking it's pray. I heard some noises around the room here and there. Plastic bag I left on the couch being shuffled. Papers being moved around. As if something was trying to distract me from myself. I only moved my head this time, and not much at all. I didn't raise it, and only went side to side, but didn't see or notice anything at all, even in the direction of the noises. This isn't the first time I've had a dream where I've left my body laying there before. The past dreams have usually been very uneventful, and I just see through my own eyes, walking around whatever the area is that I'm in. I'll walk around the neighborhood if I'm home. I often have to sleep overnight at work, and have on occasion done the same thing there. About me.. I'm a 23y/o Caucasian male working in the Navy as a Hospital Corpsman for the last 5 years. Lately, with the help of my current girlfriend, I've been trying to better myself. I've been struggling with depression and alcoholism, I have very low self-esteem and always feel the need to take the responsibility for others actions or past transgressions, even if I was never involved in the situation. I guess a good way I've been described is that I almost try to carry everyone elses' problems, and never find the time to take care of my own, often pushing them to the side.. There is alot about growing up that I just flat out don't remember, and I believe it is because I subconsciously pushed it away and drove it as far deep as I can. My father passed when I was 13, and I have very little memory of him, or myself before then, and most of my teenage years are a drunken haze. I played the mediator of my family growing up, often breaking up the fights and such of my siblings and then taking the responsibility of their actions. I have an immense amount of guilt on my shoulders, and half of it I couldn't even tell you why it's there. I've recently cut back a dramatic amount on my alcohol intake, began writing in a journal about my day, my feelings, etc, and have begun to try and analyze myself more and more each day. And slowly I'm coming up with different memories I forgot about all together.. Part of me feels like the skeleton is my subconsciousness trying to keep me from remembering those things, as if to protect me, maybe? I'm not sure, but it seems almost to cliche to have a skeleton in my closet in a dream.. Or maybe my subconsciousness is trying to warn me about what I might remember or find.. Normally I would disregard it and move on, but it happened three times in a row on the same night.. I was just hoping to hear other peoples opinions. What could it mean, what could I do, how could I "fight" this skeleton that won't allow me to move around..? Any and all help would be greatly appreciated, and I thank anyone in advance who took the time to read this.

[Wakinyan]

Of course, I have no idea what this dream is about, but I'm going to share some thoughts and feelings. One thing that struck me is the play on words (which is quite common in dreams) that you too noticed, namely, the skeleton in the closet. I actually think that that is was this dream is very much about; the skull is the symbol of your shame and fear and secrets that quite understandably has been hidden away. When such material appears in dreams it is in the shape of something scary, because it is something scary. In this dream you are in the in-between world of part consciousness and unconsciousness, you are both awake and asleep. At the border of your unconscious there is this horrendous figure, the gatekeeper if you will. You say that you want to grow, but to grow you might have to deal with your "skeleton in the closet". I do not think that this dream tries to warn you or even send you a message at all. It is just a fact: "You are now [in this vision] at the border between consciousness and unconsciousness, and here it is: Your Skeleton-in-the-Closet." From this we might draw conclusions, like if you want to grow by assimilate unconscious material, you need to deal with this first, but we shouldn't read it as a message to decipher and follow. Now, even though you do not feel like it, don't forget that you are young. There is no "need to" here. You're shaping up well and perhaps the wisest thing you could do is to go on with you life, with your career and girlfriend and so on and so forth; and perhaps get back to the skeleton later. These are my thoughts, perhaps it's some food for your thoughts.

[ManEatinCatfish]

Thanks Wikinyan, that actually does help me think of it in a different way. I think that moving forward and dealing with my current issues right now is the best possible thing for me, but I just can't help but think that something I don't want to remember or acknowledge is also keeping me down. Another way I looked at it after talking to my girlfriend, she said that since I described it as grim-reaper like, and that it constantly stayed closer each time I saw it, that maybe I could try to see it as me "dying" or being close to it.. I know "dying" in a dream isn't always a bad thing, and that it could symbolize a part of myself "dying" and setting me free almost, or allowing me to move past whatever the situation is. But I feel like I'd be over analyzing it to much with anything past that.. I

[Wakinyan]

Thank you for your feedback, interesting thoughts.

[JoannaB]

I could not agree more on the interpretation possibilities offered thus far. The only thing I have to add is that a reoccurring nightmare is a perfect way to become lucid in a dream. You could use the mantra "Next time I see a skeleton come out of my closet, I will know I am dreaming." If it works, and you do realize that it is a dream: (1) do not be afraid, realizing it is just a dream know it cannot hurt you - you are safe; (2) try to talk to the skeleton - I know you said you could not speak, but if you know it is a dream, and believe that you can speak, hopefully you will be able to - if successful, ask the skeleton why it is there. Make sure to expect an answer - in dreams our expectations often play a large cause and effect role. If it does answer, the answer may or may not make sense of course, but it is probable that it will shed light on what is going on.