Thread: Misunderstood

Is a good Dream Theater song, but that's not what this is about.

What do you believe you are most often misunderstood about? How often do you find this happening? Does everyone misunderstand you in this way, or is it just certain types or in certain settings? How do you feel when it happens? If you feel negatively, do you feel negative toward the other person because they should understand you, or do you feel negative toward yourself because of your inability to be clear or explain yourself or because you feel inadequate because you are so different from other people? Do these feelings affect how you feel toward that person? Does it affect your relationship in the long run? How do you outwardly respond to these feelings? How do people usually react to your outward reactions? Do you feel these reactions are misunderstood as well? Do you feel these reactions affect their opinion of you?

Don't feel limited to answering just these questions. Go ahead and discuss the situation of being misunderstood and its effects on you. Feel free to type angrily.

Everyone has to have been misunderstood at some point in their life. So if you opened this thread and aren't going to post a reply, why don't you want to? Would answering these questions reveal too many private things about your personality? Are you just not interested in responding?

I think what I get misunderstood about most about is when I'm with someone or a group of people and something stupid or unreasonable is said. mostly if it's something I've done considerable reading on, of course. without thinking, I'll instantly go into a deep, passionate, intricate explaination, a harangue. I don't even realize it but people interpret my passion as anger and take it personally. not to a degree where they say anything, they just think it, which is why I never knew I did this a lot until recently, talking to some people about it.

I just have a low tolerance for stupidity and if someone says something I know is ridiculous I will not hesitate to clear it up. I don't mean anything against them at all, it's the subject I'm vehement about, not the person who brought it up...and that gets misunderstood. that INTP article described this well. do you get this misunderstanding too?

"Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood."

Honestly, letting go of being at all concerned about how others perceive or "understand" me was one of the best gifts I've ever given to myself.

I am PROUD to say

I DON'T CARE!!!!!!

pj, I'm glad that is the case for you.

paperdoll, that doesn't happen to me very often. In my case, I have the urge to, but I've observed enough to know that people often misunderstand that and view the person as a know-it-all, so I just decided not to bother with clearing things up unless I am asked, which almost never happens. That and, I like to be underestimated. I like to play down my capabilities so that people expect less of me and then are surprised when it actually comes time for me to display them.

Idec, I like to do this too, being an underdog is a lot of fun. but it also comes from as pj says idc....otherwise I couldnt have been a soccer player in hs.

A class example for me was back in hs a guy bet me 10 bucks that my martial arts training wouldnt help me in a boxing match, plus I was a soccer player so I couldnt fight anyways. I took him on and cut both is bottom and top lip plus made his face all red after just 4 rounds. yeah, soccer players are pussys, right?

I speak Russian to my mom, but since I've been living in Canada since I was 6 mine is getting a little rusty and I often have A LOT of difficulty conveying anything other than "Are you hungry?" "The weather's awful" and other utterly mundane thoughts.

Trying to explain anything scientific is hell because I only ever went to school in Canada and simply don't have the vocabulary for it... and don't get me started on trying to discuss lucid dreaming

Originally Posted by paperdoll

I think what I get misunderstood about most about is when I'm with someone or a group of people and something stupid or unreasonable is said. mostly if it's something I've done considerable reading on, of course. without thinking, I'll instantly go into a deep, passionate, intricate explaination, a harangue. I don't even realize it but people interpret my passion as anger and take it personally. not to a degree where they say anything, they just think it, which is why I never knew I did this a lot until recently, talking to some people about it.

I just have a low tolerance for stupidity and if someone says something I know is ridiculous I will not hesitate to clear it up. I don't mean anything against them at all, it's the subject I'm vehement about, not the person who brought it up...and that gets misunderstood. that INTP article described this well. do you get this misunderstanding too?

I hate stupid people too. Usually when someone says something dumb I'll just stay quiet even if I know they're wrong because its aukward otherwise. Like in my one class someone said something about putting two toilets next to each other on the equator to watch them flush opposite directions. That obviously would not work. It has to do with the design of the toilet/drain not where its at on the earth (there is a scientific principle but it is at a negligible level as opposed to the design of the drain). Another thing I hate is when people who only listen to like Beyonce, or hiphop and rap, try to sing it. One girl will try to start singing it and the rest join in all at different pitches and all at wrong pitches. I have slight perfect pitch (there are certain notes that if I here them I will know they are the same pitch as in another song, and I can consistantly hear some songs at the correct pitch in my head), but it doesn't take a rocket scientist to show they can't sing.

I'm smart and must overestimate other people because most of the people in my school are complete morons. I'm in 11th grade and am taking physics and we spent like 3 weeks on postion/time and velocity/time graphs and the tests are all open notes and people still fail them. The teacher won't even call on me, even though I don't raise my hand very often anyway.

When I try to correct it, theres no good way to say it. You have to be serious because you can't really turn it in something funny unless you are sarcastic (and that would probably embarrass the person) and if you try to be serious everyone will ignore you. I find it best just to quickly say "well actually it is ... but anyway" or something to that extent.

One thing I would say I'm misunderstood about is how I actually am. In school I am always quiet and just want to get the work done and go home. At home I am crazy and play all kinds of music and instruments and sports. I'm not like one of those emo girls that every school has where no one talks to them in school and then they laugh as they cut themselves at home (or do drugs or watch anime or whatever they do). I talk to friends and stuff but during class when we're supposed to be quiet I am.

Wow I typed alot more than I planned to but maybe I should have talked about the DT song because I could go on and on about them too. (see my sig)

Originally Posted by Idec Sdawkminn

Is a good Dream Theater song, but that's not what this is about.

The members of Dream Theater were born in my town.

If you feel misunderstood it's because you're not making yourself understood. Do YOU want to decipher vague and unclear statements from other people? True, many people don't listen to you nowadays, which creates the unfortunate necessity of having to be more forceful in your conversations.

Because I've been so greatly misunderstood my entire life, for having rather "deviant views" from most people, I've stopt carring for being understood. I've found a Precious few who do understand me which is a bliss, but it is not my drive to do what I do in my life.

Recently I've been misunderstood most for my interrest in and passion for psychedelics. Even when not speaking of Mushrooms and Mescaline Cacti, but only of Marijuana alot of people are so biased as to think of me as a Junkie. They have this programmed thought process: Marijuana> Drugs> Bad! and the same for every other thing that links to drugs.
People seeing people as stereo-types are totally biased and draw quick conclusions: This is what causes so many misunderstandings between people.

I, too, hate stupidity. When people around me say dumb things I usually don't correct them and sometime they just babble meaningless bullshit that to correct would be a total waste of time. I often have to explain something to them and they don't get it. Then I have to rephrase it using simpler words (which takes much longer) in order to be understood. This is so annoying (and depressing in a way).

Originally Posted by SKA

Because I've been so greatly misunderstood my entire life, for having rather "deviant views" from most people, I've stopt carring for being understood. I've found a Precious few who do understand me which is a bliss, but it is not my drive to do what I do in my life.

Recently I've been misunderstood most for my interrest in and passion for psychedelics. Even when not speaking of Mushrooms and Mescaline Cacti, but only of Marijuana alot of people are so biased as to think of me as a Junkie. They have this programmed thought process: Marijuana> Drugs> Bad! and the same for every other thing that links to drugs.
People seeing people as stereo-types are totally biased and draw quick conclusions: This is what causes so many misunderstandings between people.

This guy has the exact same problem as me. Down to the last word.

This picture is a really good sign literally symbolizing the false paradigm not only deceived into following, but enforced into accepting.

Some things are right in front of our face, the best place to hide them.