Ok, well my last post on this forum was a while back, and i've been having problems even attaining lucidity. For some reason I seem best able to achieve dreaming during naps and not when i bed down for the night. The few LD's i've had while napping have still been struggles..Today I managed to fall into a nap and very quickly found myself dreaming, I realised I was dreaming, and once again unable to do anything but was totally aware I was dreaming and able to feel sensations very realistically. I am writing this now because I can recall the dream very clearly and it's the best I can explain my problem to date.. so here's what happened. I begin having a dream in which I am outside of my house walking, I pass by a porta potty and hear a flapping,thumping sound inside.. it sounds like a bat is trapped (this is when I realised i was dreaming...I asked my self why in the heck i would have a porta potty outside my house...) from there the dream instantly went to inside the house with my telling my father there were bats in the porta potty....soon after it jumped to my room...where I began trying to control the dream more than just letting it flow.. it was a very choppy dream.. now this part I must say is what sums up every LD i've had to date.. i just could never remember it when trying to explain... I cannot See myself.. in my dreams..It's like i am looking out two holes cut out of a paper bag over my head except my body arms,legs etc are not visible 90% of the time.. I tried looking in a mirror in my dream and could see nothing but eyes... I fought with myself until my face emerged.. the entire time i felt as if i was in a straight jacket unable to move my arms or legs... I tried to look at my hands but i could not move my arms nor see them or my hands.. I asked for more clarity I tried and tried to move my arms and rub my hands together but no go... finally i was trying to break free of the wieghted down feeling and i had dreampt that my body pillow was wrapped around me like a lead boa constrictor I peeled it away, and squirmed out if it's grip... i tried lifting the bag or whatever was covering my head off of me, but I couldn't i felt as though i was trapped...upon struggling to move in the dream I woke up..that and the dog had began to bark in real life which woke me as well.. But that sums up every single lucid dream i've had.. i just could not recall enough detail to be able to fully describe the feeling.. and after that nap dream... I realised that I myself am missing visually etc. from every LD i've had.. Now i'm not sure how to get past this problem.. I have a tendancy to sleep on my stomach with my arms pinned down and a pillow over my head... every time i've achieved lucidity i've been sleeping that way.. could that be transferring over into the dream?...I can't nor have i been able to dream while sleeping on my back.. not sure why.. it's just extremely hard for me.. any suggestions are welcome.
I also forgot to mention I kind of think this could be more of a halucination state during sleep paralysis prior to lucid dreaming. However, it seems an aweful lot like a lucid dream because i realise it's a dream (ie. not real or possible) and i am indeed asleep while this is happening. Sometimes I'm able to have slight control but I still cannot move or see myself most of the time.. but I always get the feeling of heavyness, inability to move, being constricted and so on.. When I try to LD I often try to repeat to myself while im falling asleep "I'm awake but i'm dreaming" over and over...as well as doing reality checks throughout the day and just before bed.. My thoughts are maybe I should try a different method? o.0
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