Help I'm new - is this a start? (long :P)

[destinationmoon]

My name is Michelle and I am new here, but have been reading the site for about a week now and had my first experience today and wanted opinions. I was led to this website because I have been researching sleep paralysis as I have been having episodes on and off quite frequently for the last 3 years and they really scare me. But I became interested in Lucid Dreaming and wanted to try it. I have been keeping a dream journal for a week now, remembering up to 3 dreams a night - but this has never been much of an issue for me. I have been doing reality checks all the time, mainly reactive ones. I have had one oppurtunity to try a WILD, but for some reason the fear I have for sleep paralysis seems to be tied to Lucid Dreaming as well, probably as I fear loss of control, and prefer to not be concious if nightmares occur ect. However I was having an afternoon nap today, and I decided to just suck it up and try it, however I fell asleep. I awoke after about an hour and after a dream, with Lucid Dreaming obviously still strong, as I decided to attempt a DEILD. I immediatetly did not move, kept my breathing even and tried to enter sleep again. I could tell I was drifting to sleep because a landscape started to form on the back of my eyelids, and it was getting brighter (and I knew I was in a dark room). Just as the dream seemed like it was going to begin, I head a loud voice (which I sensed to be evil) say "SILENCE" really loud close to me. I then got really freaked out and woke myself up, only to have sleep paralysis. I decided to try a suggestion I got off this forum, about moving your eyes and changing your breathing pattern to alert my body. I held my breath, and it worked I still proceeded to do many reality checks as I was afraid of a FA and wanted to be sure I was awake! I'd like to know if this counts as a Lucid dream, or is just a really good start. Also, any tips for keeping the dream going and not getting scared? I think this happened because of my own expectations that it was going to be scary, how do I get past this? Sorry this is so long! Help appreciated!

[dreamingofdreaming]

You sound a lot like me starting out. I too get SP naturally and my recall has always been rather good. I don't think I would consider your experience a lucid dream but you were SO close. It seems that you transitioned but since you got freaked out you woke yourself up. I too have heard voices. The first hallucination I ever got was someone whispering my name in my ear. I thought it was cool though since I've completely embraced the fact that SP and anything that comes along with it is ALL IN YOUR HEAD. Nothing can harm you, the more you work yourself up the harder it will be to transition into an LD. Next time you try to WILD and you hear/see/feel any presence, use it as a sign telling you that you are about to enter a dream. Don't shake it, keep lying there, tell yourself "I'm dreaming" soon the "fear" will pass and you will feel a "shift". At this point get up and do an RC and (hopefully) fly away Also, look around the WILD forum for further tips. Good luck!

[destinationmoon]

Thanks for the reply! As I posted in the WILD forum, I had my first sucessful WILD today and it wasn't scary at all! I got passed the fear and it was so worth it!