Originally Posted by
DeeryTheDeer
I've read that "stand-offish" body language usually stems from low self-esteem and shyness, and I heartily agree. I don't feel like any guys ever notice me or ever find me attractive when they see me, most of the time. I feel like most of them must be grimacing with disgust when they see me walk by, especially if they're attractive to me. It's not like I'm a bitch or don't care, I just have a really hard time feeling like I'm worth a guy's attention, so I feel like a total gross idiot if I EVER tried to flirt with a guy, or even look at him directly in the eye for too long. I feel like he'd easily find me disgusting or weird. Also, it's hard to feel safe with a guy when you feel like ANY guy you're trying to date could potentially be a rapist/stalker/abusive creep. It happens all the time. My mom was always super protective and fearful of me ever going out on my own, and when I first when on dates she absolutely NEEDED to know his full name, age, phone number, address, where we were going, how long I'd be staying, call often, etc, because she consistently expected the worst from any man who was with me. Now, don't you think any of that factors into why I don't trust men? Don't you think there's a real danger a lot of the time, given our society, and how violent and abusive MANY men are? I'm not saying my mom was right, but it has affected me. I'm just saying that men need to understand how dangerous it is for women to put themselves out there, and not be so judgmental, selfish or aggressive. Not all guys I dated were ever touchy feely like him, especially so early on in dating. In fact, most weren't.