My names Brendan. The very reason I have joined this board was because of an perculiar lucidity experience I experienced 2 nights ago. Someone posted about taking some sort of sleeping drug to induce higher clarity and this is similar to what I experienced but happened many hours after I had finished with a particular pain killer.

I have suffered from surgery and so I have a script for pain killers "hydrocodone". Being somewhat interested in psychology technicalities myself I am aware they are similar to heroin, at high doses they can induce a complete "white light" transcendental experience or "satori" (zen buddhism), where you are blasted out of your bodymind in undefinable bliss. This state can be attained through proper seated zen meditation after approximately and hour or two give or take, but I usually cant stand the pain of sitting in "zazen" position as its called in buddhism.

Because I have a doctor script for these pills and a bit of time I decided to take it to the dosage level needed to reach this state. These pills however can induce that state while laying down and on a lazy weekend I decided to to embark on this plane for a few hours during the day. I was feeling rather normal and that night put my head down on the pillow feeling nothing unusual.

The point of the matter has nothing to do with the state I went into during that day. I have done that with other yogic methods before, then gone to sleep and had no more vivid lucid dreams than usual. It has never really improved my lucid dreaming before and so that is why this is interesting. That night in particular though; I woke up at about 2-3am and my head had been ringing really loud, I felt a pressure in my brain. Being tiredsome I didnt wake up, but as soon as my thoughts started comming to a deep silence and slowness the ringing would get louder simultaneously. For a few times it got so loud and I never even got to cross over because I was getting a little annoyed by it and was also half asleep.

Eventually I went past a very loud ringing threshold and as that happened I saw in the black rainbow holographic place (that place alot of people experience) where you go before you enter dreams, i went there for a second, and then a lucid dream started. At this point it was nothing out of the ordinary and probably not even note worthy. But what happened next was after that dream finished the ringing started again and the dream started to vanish. Vanishing as it was the ringing coincidentally got louder and then I would see for a moment the certain "landing pad" of my dreams; blackness, half alsleep and not thinkingness.

The ringing was loud again and it was overwhelming. It was like I was "the ringing". I've never had this "ringing pressure" during the nighttime before". Not consciously anyway.

What it seemed to me was my conscioussness was centred around this ringing noise, and also a feeling of pressure in my head. From the ringing, the "being", another dream spawned from there, very lucid. This going in and out, with the ringing and pressure as the centre kept happening. Every time it was as if I was a diving in and out of dreams embracing the dream elements which were "grounded" around this one ringing noise, or better explained "being" noise.

"What the hell is a human being?? What human? What are they" - that sort of thing

Some of my memories of the last dreams was "creating a situation where I could tell me father that I took this thing and it makes your head ring and you can goto this place which is just oh so good and now he was blessed with the eternal life that I had just found". Im not sure how many dreams I had but I know that I was, or atleast felt more alive during those nighttime hours than I feel now as a soul embodied in a physical body. I felt more alive, like electrical than beeing physically embodied. During the later moments I did not feel asleep, I felt more "awake".

All good things must come down though, thats the the law of the great Tao right? LOL I woke up and the ringing was very low by the time the sun was up. I couldn't launch out of my body again though, can you imagine me tossing and turning thinking , no , no, no come back. I was trying to launch off again, but the ringing was low. I was realising I was human again.

Eventually I gave up. After sitting up I thought of many things. Quite honestly; mostly of blowing my brains out in a painless manner.

I have a great life and am content, intelligent and healthy, I would never do that so dont worry.

But really it felt like it didnt matter however anything ended up that I would always return to that place, where I was something I am not now. Oh how I miss that place.