eh, i figured there's probably some people would be too lazy to follow the link
so here it is
Sunday, May 28, 2006
Rampage (MY FIRST LUCID DREAM!!)
I was in some city. I had parked my car in front of mmy apartment building and was doing something inside. When I come back outside, I see that the whole front of my Jeep has been stolen. Everything from the hood to the engine to the windshield. I ask some mechanics, who were working like 10ft away if they had seen anything. They hadn't. Of course they hadn't. They were probably in on it. I go back inside and grab an axe. I keep saying to myself that this can't be happening.
So I do a reality check. I try to stick my finger through my hand. It doesn't go through. Crap, this IS real, and my car really DID get jacked. So I smash away on my car to relieve some anger. I try to stick my finger through my hand again, but nothing. So I try something else. I try to wake myself up. Slowly, because I've actually woken myself up before by doing this. I got a glimpse of myself laying in bed, and it all clicked. It REALLY is a dream, and I'm lucid.
Me, being the man I am, combined with the fact that I had an axe in my hands, I did what any man would do, and just started smashing everything I could with the axe. People started chasing me, trying to subdue me, A) because I was smashing their stuff, and B) because I probably looked like a raving lunatic swinging the axe around. I made sure the blade of the axe was dull, so it just bludgeoned the people. I didn't really want blood flying all over the place.
One of the people was an attractive woman, mid twenties. She said she was a master in 3 forms of martial arts and that I could hit her in the arms all she wants, but I wouldn't hurt her, because she could block out any pain that was dealt to her arms. So I swing the axe and hit her hand. She then says, "Nevermind, I guess I'm not drunk enough to not feel anything yet.... Ouch." I laugh and run off.
One time they almost get me pulled down to the ground. I start losing Lucidity here, but then it snaps back and I summon a Fire Extinguisher, and put my axe through it. In the confusion I run off and leave them.
Then I ran into some kid who I had let borrow my Dallas Cowboys Starter Jacket. He says he's sorry he hadn't given it back yet, and was about to take it off, but I say "No need.... I kill things now!", wave my axe in the air, and laugh an evil maniacal(sp) laugh. Even though I hadn't killed anything yet, I always wanted a reason to laugh maniacally(sp). Plus I had to come up with something better than "Me Smash!". So I run off again.
This time I run into a port, and it looks like a fleet of "enemy" ships were trying to take the harbor. Who the "enemy" is, I have no clue. I didn't even know we were at war. But they're the bad guys, so I rush in to help. This is where I lose all Lucidity.
They have a bunch of little, ten man, boats, all long and skinny. But no one was on top, they were all below deck. So I jump up on top of one of the ships and intend to kill the first guy that pops out. Then I remember that I only have an axe, and they probably all have guns.... and then I trip and fall on my face. Of course they opened the hatch and popped out, right at the same moment. Crap. So I roll off the ship and into the water as fast as I can, in order to avoid a barrage of bullets.
I swim around for a little while until I'm sure they aren't looking. Then I go back and try it again. This time, on another ship, they pop out before I could even get on the ship. So I say screw it and swim around.
I see the old lady from the movie Grandma's Boy, the slutty one, standing in the water in a bathing suit. I tell her that her friend (the guy from Grandma's Boy) says "What's Up".
Influences: Grandma's Boy <--> Just seen it the other day
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