Very Disturbing/Depressing Nightmare about Rape

[WolfeDreamer531]

I recently started college this Monday so my sleep schedule has been a little tampered with the last few days. Yesterday/this morning, I had a vivid nightmare so disturbing that I felt depressed about it for the majority of the day; I've decided not to even write about in my DJ, in the fears that if someone where to read, they would think I'm some kind of sick psychopath (not that I did anything wrong in it). Let me go ahead and get you up to speed on some things that I felt were relevant to the dream. I did ingest 5-HTP which is a known precursor to Melatonin and Serotonin; this may have attributed to the nightmare. My dad and I also had a conversation about a movie he saw about the Transatlantic Slave trades (seems irrelevant but it will come into play later on). He was telling me about the horrible things that they did to some of the slaves in the trip across the Atlantic and how he can't see how humans could (can) do such things to other humans. The dreamed started off in my living room where I was watching a movie with my dad. In the particular scene, there was a little girl (about 12) who was being kept as a sex slave along with her sister (who was about 17). *Note: I am just explaining the details of my dream so that you can better imagine what I saw. The little girl was very gorgeous and her body was very mature (I really don't feel comfortable saying it exactly but she had developed breasts). The little girl was laying inside a dirty cell, completely nude, with her older sister who was partially dressed. They both looked like they had undergone abuse (physical and sexual) and overall looked worn out. As my dad and I watched the scene, a rather obese, dirty man walked in the cell towards the little girl. My dad was explaining to me what was going on in the scene; I was waiting for him to finish so that I could tell him that I couldn't stomach what was about to happen to the little girl. But I never got a chance. *This next part may seem confusing but in a lot of my dreams, when I'm watching TV or someone is telling me a story, I actually "go into" the story/movie sometimes. And when this happens, its like I'm watching a real life movie take place before my eyes. It's like I'm there, but I'm not there at the same time, I don't know if that makes sense, but it happens and that's just how it is. I entered the scene and found myself watching something I hope to never witness again. The grotesque man went on to brutally rape the young girl right in front of her older sister who did nothing but what she could do: sit there and weep. The girl who was being raped took it as if she was used to it; like she no longer cried b/c she was emotionally drained from having it happened to her so many times. She had a stone-expression on her face; it was like she was dead inside. I felt so incredibly sad and depressed for the little girl and her sister. As the dream faded out and I began to wake up and come to, it made me think a lot about what goes on in this world. It made me think about all the rape victims (past, present and future victims) and all the sex-slaves (again past, present and future slaves) in the world (esp. the children). I really wish I became lucid so that I could have avenged the little girl by unleashing doomsday onto that man. I've never killed someone in any of my dreams but that would have surely been the first. I feel like a part of my pride was raped along with her. I also feel like I let the little girl down by not being able to come to her rescue; I failed her. Needless to say, I've been really bummed out today over the fact that even though it was just a dream, it gave me a sample of the reality of what actually goes on in this world. The dream seemed like a symbol of every sexually abused/rape victim in the world. I can't just shake it off and act like it never happened b/c the reality is, it did happen. It does happen. It happened throughout human history, it happens everyday, and it will continue to happen all over the world until God knows when. I've tried my best to forget about it but I simply can't. I don't know why I'm even writing this here but I simply cant get it off my mind. I guess I just feel obligated to tell about. Some feedback would be much appreciated.