Fear of change...how to overcome?

[Merlock]

Asking one and all, who can help me find the answer to my question, the one question that worries me now more than any other... How does one go about overcoming fear of change? How does one stop being afraid of change when the fear is so strong and so deep in one's subconscious that it foils all and every effort set to achieving a certain goal? When it's so complicated even to just imagine the outcome of the goal because it is something so different (better even, not worse, but different still)... Any and all input would be greatly appreciated.

[R.Carter]

Hey Merlock, If I were you I'd start with very small changes in my routine. Low stress changes that would have no real impact in your life other than to assure you that you can change without negative consequences. For instance: If you make your bed every day, don't for a week. Take a new route home from work/school. Try some new foods, etc. Hopefully this will show you that change won't hurt you. I have a very complicated work schedule and rely on repetition to help me stay focused and not overlook any details. By comparison I also vary my personal routines regularly to avoid falling into a rut. It's also been proven that even minute changes in your life helps to keep your mental processes sharp. Let me know how you do ! Good Luck ! R.C.

[Nirvana Starseed]

The problem is one is attached to everything. When one does not care wether one lives or dies or what happens. But meanwhile has a strong will in achieveing goals and dreams. Then change will not be a problem, either will failure, and one is in a position to live life fully to the best of ones ability. With acceptance. Ideally this is so, but everyone has their limits. Takes time to master.

[Gwendolyn]

If I were you, I would look deep into my life. What happened to you that caused you to become so afraid? Whatever it was (and there is something, I am sure), let go. Once you let go of that, you should be able to let go of your fears. Change is everywhere, and everything changes. Just remember that, in your quest.

[Howie]

Originally posted by Nirvana Starseed The problem is one is attached to everything. When one does not care wether one lives or dies or what happens. But meanwhile has a strong will in achieveing goals and dreams. Then change will not be a problem, either will failure, and one is in a position to live life fully to the best of ones ability. With acceptance. Ideally this is so, but everyone has their limits. Takes time to master. I have a close friend with the same issue! I think that Nirvan Starseed is on to something. Have you ever hear the saying, " the only thing inevitable is change." So there is nothing you or anyone else can do about this but let your egoic entity accept it. Welcome it. You are change. you are not the same person you were ten minutes ago. and won't be ten minutes from now. Perceive things as now! Not future or past. What is , is ! Theisness of now!

[Merlock]

Thanks to everyone for the advice. Carter's advice is great for forcing this change out of me and the rest is a great help to my logical (and emotional) reasoning on the matter, which also helps overcome the fear.

[AirRick101]

If you are willing to share specifics that motivated you to type up this request, it might help! but only if you are comfortable with it. The best way to overcome fear of anything is to just do it. Thinking more about it usually intensify's the fear, and nothing is like the exposure of actually putting yourself out there. You get used to something, no matter what it is, after much repetition.

[Night Wolf]

Hey yo, It's funny cos I was just thinking about this the other day, and I remember I had a book called "Who Moved My Cheese?" (funny name I know) written by Dr Spencer Johnson. Basically it's about people in a maze (a metaphor for life) who look for cheese (a metaphor for what we want in life; a good job, good relationships, etc. etc.) I'm not going to go too much into it, but having concrete ideas (the maze and the cheese) gives us an easier way of looking at deeper things (change and life etc.) Here's a little extract from the book to make what I'm saying sound more coherent: Change Happens They keep moving the cheese Anticipate Change Get Ready for the cheese to move Adapt to Change Quickly The quicker you let go of old cheese, the sooner you can enjoy new cheese. Change Move With The Cheese Enjoy Change! Savor the adventure and enjoy the taste of new cheese! Be Ready to Change quickly and Enjoy it again They Keep Moving the Cheese Anyways, I suggest you find this book. It's very short, takes me about an hour to read. I'm sort of in a place in my life where things are changing very quickly and I'm not sure if I'm keeping up, but I think this book helped at least a little! Sooo.... enough with all the cheese. Hope this is what you were after! Laters.

[Ex Nine]

Originally posted by Merlock When it's so complicated even to just imagine the outcome of the goal ... Don't think about the outcome of the goal. Think of the goal. And the next step of what you need to do to accomplish that goal. Of course, you needn't be so narrow-minded on those things that you are ignorant of changes that will happen afterwards, but what happens after the goal is of no concern to you unless you have already reached the goal. Aside from events occurring after the goal probably being complex and largely unpredictable, your own responses to them are also unpredictable to some degree. Accomplishing your goal will change your circumstances in unexpected ways, though mostly delightful.