Whenever I start up my computer, I get a little witty quote, courtesy of fortune. They're quite funny sometmes, so I thought I'd share some with you:

In a five year period we can get one superb progamming language. Only we can't control when the five year period will begin.
\"Those who do not do politics will be done in by politics.\"
--French Proverb
\"Well, if you can't believe what you read in a comic, what *can* you believe?!\"
--Bullwinkle J. Moose [Jay Ward]
Bride, n.:
A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.
--Ambrose Bierce, \"The Devil's Dictionary\"
This is your fortune.
(8) Pedestrians are:
(a) irrelevant
(B) communists
© a nuisance
(d) difficult to clean off the front grille.

The correct anwser is (a). Pedestrians are not in cars, so they are totally irrelevant; you should ignore them completely.
\"They told me I was gullible...and I believed them!\"
Cold, adj:
When the local flashers are handing out written descrptions.
There are two ways to write error-free programs. Only the third one works.
What the world *really* needs is a good Automatic Bicycle Sharpener.
Are you a turtle?
\"I genreally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.\"
--Mae West
\"Eat, drink, and be merry, for tommorow you may work.\"
BE ALERT!!!! (The world needs more lerts...)
Well, my terminals locked up, and I ain't got any mail,
And I can't recall the last time that program didn't fail,
I've got stacks in my struts, I've got arrays in my queues,
I've got the: Segementation Violation -- Core Dumped Blues

If you think it's nice that you get what you C,
Then go: Illogical statement with your whole family,
'Cause the Supreme Court ain't the only place with: Bus error views
I've got the: Segementation Violation -- Core Dumped Blues

On a PDP-11, life should be a breeze,
But with VAXen in the house even magnetic tapes would freeze.
Now you might think that unlike VAXen I'd know who I abuse,
I've got the: Segemntation Violation -- Core Dumped Blues
You can't judge a book by the way it wears its hair.
No matter how subtle the wizard, a knife in the shoulder blades will seriouly cramp his style.