An Assortment of Forum Items [teh FUNNEY!]

[Kaniaz]

WARNING: This thread has been known to cause heart attacks in little fluffy bunnies. If you happen to be a little fluffy bunny, you better use the back button on your browser now. If you don't have a back button on your browser, congratulations, you're using a dumb browser. And I don't mean ANY OF THIS either, I just made it up out of boredom. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED IN BIG FAT CAPITAL LETTERS THAT LOOK QUITE SEXY. [weirdaccent]Welcome, moderators, to Professor Van Leuweenhocks store of Moderator Thrones! You too can make yourself look like a veel professional at your voolentary job by buying one of these vantastic thrones today! Vor a limited vine only, I am selling these fantastic thrones away at half price! Grab voors today![/weirdaccent] Deluxe Tolieta' Throne Yes, now you too can look like the almighty scum of the forum! For a limited time only, grab your real lavatory toliet throne today! Comes with REAL POO! The smell is enough to drive any pathetic puny grovelling forum members away from your domain for all eternity! Rest and relax in your newfound peice, and smell the fantastic fragance. Even has a real, deluxe flushing action! If you can't be bothered to click the lock thread button, you can just stuff the thread down your throne, flush it and laugh at everybody with your amazing, evil powerful laugh (not included). The Keep-Your-Ass Grove Throne If you're a moderator who has a taste for not doing anything excepting posting threads about how cool you are (and deleting threads about how cool other people are), you're bound to be fed up with your ass-grove getting messed up when you walk to the fridge to go make a sandwhich. Get the Keep-Your-Ass Grove throne today, and when you make that long, grovelling walk to the fridge, you can settle back into your well-defined ass-grove with no problems whatsoever! And if anything pathetic normal forum members try to mess it up, the rabid dog cage conviently hidden under the throne will open up, and you can be treated to a fantastic display of gore, blood and frothing at the mouth! Just remember to clean the mess up afterwards. The Cesar Throne Do you love banning people? Do you try to ban at least 3 people a day to keep yourself going? Wish you could do it in a more fantastic way? Get this throne! One sat in by Julius Ceaser, you can bring in those people you want to ban, video tape them doing pathetic things as they try to gain your mercy, then press the red button located on the side of the Cesar Throne, and hear a real recording of Juilius Caesar, then ban those forum members down into the horrible horny crocodile pit! Moderator: Dance, and I may let you go. Member: Okay, yes Mr. Moderator sir. *dances a goofy ass dance* Moderator: Hah. That was funny. *presses button* Recording: OFF WITH HIS HEAD! Hole in the floor opens up under members feet. Member: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *SPLASH* Member: It's dark in here. *light turns on* Horrible Horny Crocodiles: Hello, poppet. *jump on member* Member: ARGH! HELP ME! Moderator: BWAHAHA- Er, enough laughing. NEXT! The "Bugger off I don't care" Throne If you're fed up of newbies saying "CAN I HAVE A COOL AVATAR PLEASE", or "SO-AND-SO SAID A RUDE WORD", get the Bugger off I don't care throne! With built in kick-that-person-so-out-of-my-moderator-palace actions included! Newbie: Hello, Moderator... Throne kicks Newbie out through the window. Throne plays automatic laughing noise recorded by the owner of the throne. So, what are you waiting for? Buy one of these fantastic thrones today and also receive a free TRUTHBEARER PLUSHIE! Says 10 fantastic phrases. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Kaniaz is so cool. Guy pulls string. Plushie: I am stupid and I worship Kaniaz. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Can I have sex with you? Guy pulls string. Plushie: I fancy old ladies. And that brings us to our next store! The FORUM MEMBER PLUSHIE STORE! Here you can buy fantastic plushies of many forum members! Here's an sample of some of them! icedawg plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: Me and my nail in board shall kick your ass. Guy pulls string. Plushie: I shall kick your ass to the moon. And then laugh at you. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Stop touching me or I'll kick your ass. kaniaz plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: toasters are too intelligent for me to have a conversation with Guy pulls string. Plushie: windows<linux Guy pulls string. Plushie: I have no life. lowercase plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: That's nice. (woo, more post count). Guy pulls string. Plushie: Yeah same here. (woo, more post count). Guy pulls string. Plushie: I AM SO NOT A POST WHORE! lost soul plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: I am a level 12 cleric in neverwinter nights Guy pulls string. Plushie: Oh no, an orge! Guy pulls string. Plushie: Quick! Use the ressurrect spell! lucius plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: *bounch* Guy pulls string. Plushie: *bounch* *bounch* Guy pulls string. Plushie: *bounch* *bounch* *bounch* ffx-dreamz plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: I like pressing the quote button Guy pulls string. Plushie: FU*K YOUR OPINON. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Am I a moderator yet? werburn flooshie Guy pulls string. Plushie: Come, my hordes of darkness! We shall take over the world! Guy pulls string. Plushie: I shall adopt you all! My babies! Guy pulls string. Plushie: And now, I release my secret weapon: the goat lady! bwahahah! seeker plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: As of today, I have adopted 30 newbies. Guy pulls string. Plushie: (EDIT: Make that 35). Guy pulls string. Plushie: (EDIT: Well, it's 40 now). ev plushie Guy pulls string. Plushie: melatonin Guy pulls string. Plushie: weed Guy pulls string. Plushie: dope So? What are you waiting for? Buy one by just losing 5 from your post count! Lowercase Society: NEVER! And now, onto our next store! The compromising-video-tapes-of-what-the-forum-members do in their spare time! Buy yours today and reveal the deepest darkest secrets of the forum members! Here's a few excerpts from the tapes: kaniaz video tape Kaniaz is in the kitchen. Kaniaz: So, Mr Blender, what have you done today? Kaniaz: Mr Blender? Kaniaz: OH MY GOD THEY KILLED MR BLENDER! truthbearer video tape Truthbearer is in front of a mirror. Truthbearer: I am sexy. Truthbearer: I shall pick up a girl tonight. Truthbearer: I am the sexiest man alive. icedawg video tape Icedawg is in a bank with his nail in board. Icedawg: Come here, tax attorneys! I SHALL KILL YOU! *SMACK!* Icedawg whacks a tax attorney. Icedawg is dragged away by the police. ev video tape Ev is in his bedroom. Ev: Woah, that does something to you..The walls are melting...cool... Ev stumbles around and hits the door Ev FUC- *collapses* Looks intresting, dosen't it? Buy the full collection today (100 video tapes in total), and you'll also receive a can of weird stuff I found in my garage! Thankyou for shopping at DVC, the only place for your forum goods!

[Stalker]

ROFLMAO. That was the funniest thing I have read in a long time.

[nerve]

that's great man.

[Truthbearer]

I have to give it to you man, that was pretty good stuff... Only two small comments: 1. You forgot to include paperdoll 2. I am very sexy!

[Kaniaz]

I was going to include paperdoll... Guy pulls string. Plushie: I hate you. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Go away. Guy pulls string. Plushie: I still hate you. ...But I didn't. But now I have.... ...And just so you know, I was going to do this for your amazing-compromising-video: Truthbearer is standing in front of a mirror with a skirt on. Truthbearer: We are sexy. Truthbearer: We are sexy bitches. ...But I didn't. But now I have.

[Truthbearer]

Good... I am glad I asked....

[Aphius]

Thats all pretty interesting... but you forgot my plushie... So Here's one for the product line. Order now and you could get this Aphius Plushie for the low cost of 10 posts! Lowercase Society: Aaaaggh! The Aphius plushie is the only plushie that has the ability to speak completely like he's in a Noir novel! The Aphius plushie Guy: pulls string. Plushie: A chill shot up my spine like shards of glass as the cord was pulled outwards... Guy: pulls string. Plushie: My whole body shook as the Beans I had for lunch unleashed an attack equivalent to that of a thousand armies... I had violently soiled myself... Guy: pulls string. Plushie: The realisation hit me like a pound of yak testicles in the face... I was a cheap piece of merchandice, marketed by Kaniaz for nothing but to line his pockets with the gold of gullible n00bs... Guy: pulls string. Plushie:gratsurmfratumshlagahafa... wook.. purf... click click... *Noise made because the product was defective* Guy: pulls string several times only to have the plushie catch fire. Guy: Damn you Kaniaz!

[Kaniaz]

Or this version? Guy pulls string. Plushie: Go dancing orange. Guy pulls string. Plushie: The orange will prevail. Guy pulls string. Plushie: DAMN YOU HELP! THE ORANGE HAS BRAINWASHED ME! HELP M- *arrgh*. Go dancing orange.

[Aphius]

I think you're on the right track, more like this though... Guy pulls string. Plushie: Go dancing orange. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Banana is teh suXX0r! Guy pulls string. Plushie: Don't peddle your vile candy to me candyman!

[A Lost Soul]

I want to collect them all!

[WerBurN]

awesome...simply....awesome... ive said it before, and ill say it again, Kaniaz it the king of senseless banter btw, Kaniaz, what is a flooshie? i dont have a plushie, i get a flooshie...wtf?

[Lucius]

Well,I have a pretty bounchy reputation..*cough* *bounch* *cough* Great ^_^

[YULAW]

Only Kaniaz can pull this off. That was so freaking Hilarious...

[theroguechemist]

ICEDAWG: Implement this! It'd be revolutionary! Spending your post counts on cool stuff.. like... well, i dunno.. but,.... it'd be cool!

[WerBurN]

but then we have more post-whores, cause there'd be a reason to post-whore...

[dougdrums]

it's like at the aaotracker forums...

[ffx-dreamz]

Holy shit!That was funny!!!Oh yeah Kaniaz, I do not like to press the quote button!! *cough* see[/b] told[/b] you[/b] *cough*

[CT]

PlushieMON, GOTTA CATCH EM ALL!!!

[nerve]

Originally posted by Kaniaz I was going to include paperdoll... Guy pulls string. Plushie: I hate you. Guy pulls string. Plushie: Go away. Guy pulls string. Plushie: I still hate you.

[CocoDan]

http://www.geocities.com/aphius_diamoue/Orange.txt ---WTF??? *.txt??? Great shit! We must replace the banana!!! And great work on it by the way.

[Aphius]

Originally posted by CocoDan http://www.geocities.com/aphius_diamoue/Orange.txt ---WTF??? *.txt??? Great shit! We must replace the banana!!! And great work on it by the way. Thanks. Geocities wont let you remote link images, so if I make it a text file it lets me link it but it still works like an image!

[CocoDan]

Okay, because that was messed up. Couldn't view source so I thought something was wrong.