There is a girl on my bed!

**Tyler** · 07-14-2009 08:00 PM

What do I do?
I have handcuffs in the closet, but there may be some rope in the basement. The headboard is nice and sturdy so either should hold her.

Help me DV!

**Jeff777** · 07-14-2009 08:02 PM

**Hollings** · 07-14-2009 08:05 PM

> get all

(this seems like lots of fun/

**Tyler** · 07-14-2009 08:06 PM

Originally Posted by Jeff777

You want me to do nothing?
But Jeff...she's on my bed.

**[SomeGuy]** · 07-14-2009 08:08 PM

Hmm...tie her up and make her eat cupcakes. Then get on the computer and continue with the updates.

**Zhaylin** · 07-14-2009 09:18 PM

Ask her why she's there.
What's the secret mystery of Your Bed that's drawn her?

**Tyler** · 07-14-2009 10:25 PM

Originally Posted by [SomeGuy]

Hmm...tie her up and make her eat cupcakes. Then get on the computer and continue with the updates.

Ok, used handcuffs and rope so she is secure, but feeding her the cupcakes i got blue and red icing all up her nose and all over her mouth

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Ask her why she's there.
What's the secret mystery of Your Bed that's drawn her?

Maybe it was the patching pillowcases and comforter, maybe it was the softness of my bed, but I'm hoping it was my penis.

**DarkLucideity** · 07-14-2009 10:29 PM

How do I tell if there is a girl on my bed?

**Tyler** · 07-14-2009 10:32 PM

Originally Posted by pojmaster17q

How do I tell if there is a girl on my bed?

Don't make this about you.

Now, what do i do next?

**DarkLucideity** · 07-14-2009 10:58 PM

Originally Posted by Fableflame

Don't make this about you.

Now, what do i do next?

Check whether or not there is a girl on my bed. Trust me. This isn't about me at all.

**Keresztanya** · 07-14-2009 11:30 PM

Tell the stupid bitch to get out and stop sleeping on your bed.

**ninja9578** · 07-14-2009 11:35 PM

I'd go with the handcuffs, those are soooooo much fun

:devil:

**khh** · 07-15-2009 12:07 AM

It doesn't belong. Kill it!

**Tyler** · 07-15-2009 12:51 AM

Originally Posted by Demon Parasite

Tell the stupid bitch to get out and stop sleeping on your bed.

She isn't sleeping!
She's looking at me with this intimidating look, and trying to coax me into bed with her, is it a trap??

Originally Posted by khh

It doesn't belong. Kill it!

Why? Does she want me in bed with her to kill me?

**khh** · 07-15-2009 01:07 AM

Originally Posted by Fableflame

She isn't sleeping!
She's looking at me with this intimidating look, and trying to coax me into bed with her, is it a trap??

Yes, it's a trap.

Originally Posted by Fableflame

Why? Does she want me in bed with her to kill me?

No, she probably doesn't. But if you want to try, make sure you secure her first.

**Tyler** · 07-15-2009 01:10 AM

Originally Posted by Fableflame

Ok, used handcuffs and rope so she is secure, but feeding her the cupcakes i got blue and red icing all up her nose and all over her mouth

scroll up, she's already secured.

**Keresztanya** · 07-15-2009 05:33 AM

Originally Posted by Fableflame

She isn't sleeping!
She's looking at me with this intimidating look, and trying to coax me into bed with her, is it a trap??

Why? Does she want me in bed with her to kill me?

Tell her to get the fuck out and stop breathing your air.

Seriously, stupid bitches are wasting your time, you need to get back on the computer and tell her to leave you alone.

**Tyler** · 07-15-2009 05:45 AM

Originally Posted by Demon Parasite

Tell her to get the fuck out and stop breathing your air.

Seriously, stupid bitches are wasting your time, you need to get back on the computer and tell her to leave you alone.

While i was looking at the computer screen she managed to get loose and strip naked, that's good right? She keeps tugging at me, telling me to leave the computer because she has something for me! Is she gonna hurt me? I might not have time to finish this po-

**Keresztanya** · 07-15-2009 06:11 AM

Originally Posted by Fableflame

While i was looking at the computer screen she managed to get loose and strip naked, that's good right? She keeps tugging at me, telling me to leave the computer because she has something for me! Is she gonna hurt me? I might not have time to finish this po-

She's gong to hurt you! Tell her to GTFO before you get hurt.

**Banana** · 07-15-2009 07:51 AM

Dont wear a condom

those make ur penis fall off

and make sure to do anal. girls LOVE anal. if they start screaming that just means they like it

**[SomeGuy]** · 07-15-2009 11:41 AM

^Deleted.

Anyway, great, you idiot! The internet is more important than this! You can't let stupid bitches take time away from posting things! That will only get you places in life, which is what you *don't* want to do.

Try telling her "I got some serious hacking to do. Found an exploit on port 6667 of 4chan that I must exploit, trying telnet and ssh. Bruteforcing the login."

That should buy time while we think of more ways to help you. By the way, blonde? Brunette? Did she like the cupcakes? Did they get all over her face?

**Tyler** · 07-15-2009 04:22 PM

The icing got all over her face. I haven't let her up yet, she's complaining that her shoulders are getting sore because of the position she's tied in. I know what she's up to.

I told her about i had to go hack 4 6667 ports on chan and she moaned and her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she said she loved nerds.

That was an hour ago, and she seems to be tired of being tied up. She keeps screaming for me to let her go, so i took a sock and shoved it in her mouth to be quiet.

Should i let her go?