She truly thinks she's fabulous enough to rule the world;
That everyone on earth should love and fear her.
She thinks that everywhere she treads a flag should be unfurled,
And that's enough to make me want to spear her.

She'll bare her legs and toss her hair (but couldn't be well-read),
Surely sensibility will flee her.
Then every night she has a handsome man to warm her bed--
And that's enough to make me want to be her.


"The Jerk"
Adonis Cross in Far From the Pantheon

He wants to rule the universe, but if that can't be done
A galaxy would probably fulfill him.
He wants the planet Earth to orbit him--forget the sun--
And that's enough to make me want to kill him.

He's very high on cockiness and very low on charm,
So many folks avoid him once they see him.
He somehow shows at gatherings with women on his arm--
And that's enough to make me want to be him.