I've written a lot on this subject over the years. At the risk of overloading you, I'll post a couple of those missiles here, in separate posts. Feel free to use what you wish.
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The Flow
(Written on July 3, 2007)
It seems appropriate to piggyback these thoughts onto a document sitting on my computer's desktop titled "The Flow." It is a convenient set of lyrics - convenient because it's easier to just open this document and pre-pend it rather than going through the ritual of selecting a writing program and titling a new file. Quality laziness requires creativity, effort and a certain openness to opportunity.
We are on vacation, a great time to exercise such skills. The wife and girls headed further north this morning to enjoy a couple days in Indian River, participating in the 4th of July parade and watching the fireworks. Our son and I stayed behind. It is very quiet, a different kind of quiet than when the dog and I come up here by ourselves. My son is a gracious young man, always cautious to respect my space and trying to avoid interrupting my thoughts. It is a respectful though artificial quiet, not at all uncomfortable or tense. Right now, he is quietly reading. I'm doing what I do, which is a combination of playing guitar, contemplating, meditating, puttering and now writing about the contemplating and meditating.
I heard from the wife a little while ago. It was odd to be briefly interrupted by that very different world just a hundred miles north of here, as I sat outside by my small fire thinking about the parallel universes we live in and travel through. She is in one of those alternate realities while I remain here in another, enjoying the end of an amazing day on the edge of this quirky valley. Back downstate are many more worlds we move in and out of; the worlds of family, business, friends and neighbors, and the world of the very real life I lead on the internet - a uniquely odd frontier devoid of the usual physical and logistical boundaries, but also devoid of physical interaction.
The fire pit is on the edge of the valley, which changes dramatically as I watch. It has changed dramatically from this morning's dawn glow to the now rapidly settling evening. It changes from Spring to Winter, from clear to overcast, from dry to rain, from calm to storm. These are cyclic changes, yet it also advances; inch by inch, encompassing everything in its path,moving forward ceaselessly. The Valley of Desolation, that once seemingly permanent wreckage left in the wake of The Tornado, is almost gone now. A dense, thick lawn of spruce, tamarack, balsam, oak, cherry and popul rises through and over the remains of that horriffic storm, obscuring the dense tangle of flora corpses helping to feed the advance. The tallest trees on this side of the river are now well above my line of sight to the ridge beyond. The far ridge is mostly obscured by the cedar and pine forest on the far side of the river, which has regrown tall enough in the last few years to have completely changed the vista. Beneath it all, the real but invisible earth waters and nourishes and supports it all.
As the Valley changes, change also comes to the communities of this area with preparations for a major theme park being built twenty miles to the west. This world will never be the same because of it, regardless of whether it is actually completed or becomes successful. To those whose lives are rooted here, the very ground beneath their feet seems to be shifting. The communities prepare and hope for something magical and wonderful - something that could break the cycle of mundane existence in the face of economic vacuum. Those who have stubbornly remained here are themselves the soil in which these seeds of new opportunity could germinate and grow. They are also that which the creeping roots of whatever comes will forever alter.
We humans contemplate and worry and ponder and prepare for these inevitable changes, doing all within our meager capability to build structure and control into the seemingly chaotic wildernesses where we carve our lives. We build houses and communities with real enough physical structure and infrastructure, while the constructs of reason and thought gain substance as homes, towns, cities, states and nations. We weave it all together with power and control mechanisms existing only because we believe they do, as we carefully teach our children to do the same. The chaos of nature is only chaotic when we attempt to evaluate it through these invented standards. The greater Reality is far bigger and far more real than anything humans will ever invent. Our imaginary societal structures will never control or change one jot or tittle of the laws of physics and nature governing this planet, solar system, galaxy or universe.
But to what or whom do we leave all of that? We are creatures who yearn for an comprehensible structure, who crave the comfort of understanding and the control and predictability that usually follows. Consciousness itself begs for an answer to how it can exist.
We humans have an innate understanding that the eternal is real and cannot be confined in any physical way. It follows quite naturally, (though paradoxically if approached through reason,) that we cannot comprehend a finite universe with nothing beyond while at the same time we cannot fathom infinity. Like simple division, which is what we humans use when dissecting a problem to gain understanding, science and reason fail at both nothing and infinity. In contemplating these places where the established functions of reason fail, the rational asymptotes of infinity and eternity are actually easier to accept than some place or time where it just all ends with nothing beyond. We can and will always wonder what lies past the next boundary, while the concept of "Nothing" is just too absurd to grasp. We struggle mightily to reconcile that inborn sense of the infinite with the physical world and our objective experience, constructing experiment after experiment to move reason ever forward, in the naive hope of eventually encompassing everything in its path.
But then we fall asleep and dream. We wake up and love. We mourn and long and enjoy and hope. Some among us fail to repress that irrational knowledge of the greater Reality and end up creating art, music, poetry and prose in an effort to express the frustration and awe that recognition brings. Science and reason fail in providing a means to explore or convey these matters. How could they, when the very paths of reason and science rest upon and are supported by this greater Reality? The asymptotes are failures in our invented tools and methods, not in Reality.
Reason is of creation, as the Creator needs no such artifices. Reason will never define the spirit of which it is born. Nor will rational, objective humans ever reason their way to understanding the Spirit of which we are born. The created cannot comprehend the Creator, and yet there are those who hold that truth up as evidence that no Creator exists. Reason will never bring us to a place where we can view that greater Reality encompassing all, that Reality which is the Creator Himself. The utterly rational man uses reason to deny the Creator, while most of the experiences uniquely identifying us as human deny and defy rationality and reason.
"I am" is God's simple and complete answer to our effort to reason our way to Him. So much for philosophy.
The Flow
Peter J. Celano
1994
dragonflies dancing on the breeze
eagle's head shining in the sun
kingfisher resting in the trees
as i sit and watch the river run
lilies gently swaying in the breeze
basking in the bright warm glow
hammock strung between convenient trees
where i lay and watch the river flow
the river flows
whether i watch or turn away
the river flows
whether i live or waste the day
wondering where it goes
the river flows.
brown trout jumping for a fly
the line goes tight and disappears below
the music of our son's delighted cry
he keeps growing as we watch the river flow
watch our daughter chase a butterfly
picking flowers and laughing in the sun
bubbling joy as boundless as the sky
transforming as we watch the river run
the river flows
whether i watch or turn away
the river flows
whether i live or waste the day
wondering where it goes
the river flows.
a mug of fresh hot coffee and a smile
your eyes reflect the sunsets glow
won't you come sit with me for a while
and hold me as we watch our children grow
the children grow
whether we watch or turn away
the river flows
whether we live or waste the day
wondering where it goes
the river flows.
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