Hi all..

I had posted this in "The Lounge" but also thought that I should post it here as well.. (I hope that's ok).

My husband's mom died of cancer last Thursday (3/15). The doctors ONE WEEK earlier had stopped all treatment (as they were futile) and simply made her as comfortable as possible while we waited for her to die. To say that it was hard on my husband and his family is an understatement. His mom had been physically fit all her life (she ran miles everyday.. she didn't smoke or drink, etc.). In fact, his parents had just been here at Xmas celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. My mother-in-law mentioned that her stomach had been bothering her. The 1st week in Jan. she went to the doctor.. the second week of Jan. she found out she had stomach cancer.. the following weeks she had two chemo treatments and now she's dead.

I usually try for LDs using the wbtb method but I find that once I wake up in the middle of the night.. my mind instantly goes to her and I can't body asleep/mind awake (the thoughts are too strong). Plus I almost at times feel slightly "scared" for lucidity to occur (tho I know this is irrational).

Has death affected anyone else's dreams in this way? How did you get over it? I am a very spiritual person (believe in heaven/hell/afterlife, etc.) which is why this might be so hard for me.

NOTE: I was on very good terms with my mother-in-law and was able to say "goodbye" to her (tho she couldn't respond).. so I'm not concerned with anything left "unsaid" or "undone".

Thanks to any and all who reply.

P.S.: Please love strong and love hard.. you just never know what tomorrow may bring (or take away)