L33tsaber

1. Something about a truck full of macaroni and cheese.

2. One of my friends comes to visit, and we go to a restaurant.

3. Ginger ale and watermelons are illegalized in Nebraska, and I do all sorts of strange stunts in order to make them legal again.

4. My house back in my old-old town is all dark and creepy. I'm looking at my reflection in the upstairs television, and get so creeped out that - without even RCing - I decide that I'm dreaming. I keep shouting that I want everything to be normal, normal, normal, normal... but instead of normal, I get a pair of poofy shorts. So I change plans and figure that instead of normal, I should be Sora from Kingdom Hearts. I give myself the wacky hair, the outfit, the pendant, and the Keyblade, and then I wander into the basement waving my weapon (which occasionally turns floppy like a rubber toy) wherever I want there to be light.

5. I'm Robin, helping Batman on a mission. I get special gloves and boots to prevent electric shock so that I can get through buildings with electrified floors. Batman keeps getting injured, and I have to keep finding places to hide him.

6. I'm Batman, trying to get through the city without being noticed. It's dark, and there are guards everywhere. Most of the time, I just use my grappling beam to climb buildings. In one building, there's a woman sitting on a platform suspended from the ceiling, and assorted swings that I use to reach her. She thinks I have ill intentions and begins to threaten me, so I leave. When I'm outside, I hear gunshots and the woman screaming, but I just keep running away instead of going back to help her.

1. I'm going to a weird school where every day, we have physics class on the moon. I keep floating during the lecture while everyone else manages to remain seated. Eventually, I have to be stuck in a brick structure in the closet just so I can stay on the floor during class. When class is over, I have to walk through the hallways where the school's enormous marching band is lined up on either side with ridiculously fancy diamond-encrusted instruments. During one of the classes, I figure out that I can sort of fly (well, more like gliding) given a place to jump from, and that I tend to notice things the other students don't.

2. I go missing from one of the classes, and it turns out I've gotten aboard a ship in another star system where somebody had set up a bunch of explosives. I deactivate the bombs and return to Earth with the ship, which somehow doubles as a cruise ship when it lands in water.

In light of the rescue, the physics professor decides to give special rings to people in the class who have powers (even if it's just the power of observation) and tells us to be careful with them. At this point, we're starting to resemble a rag-tag bunch of DC characters - we've got a Superman, a couple of Green Lanterns, a Robin, and a few others I don't recall. I wind up being Batman, even though I'm constantly commenting on the fact that Batman can't fly.

3. Our improvised Justice League is wandering around a bookstore. Robin is holding hands with one of the Green Lanterns, and I can't help but note how cute it was. On the top floor of the bookstore, there's a guy who wants to be a Star Sapphire for some reason, even though that's a females-only corps.

4. One of the guys is upset that he wasn't picked for the League. He tries to find the bookstore again, but all he ends up doing is flying around and knocking parts off of assorted buildings because he's too big and he's not paying attention to where he's going.

5. I'm staying over at my friends' apartment where you need a key card from a nearby hotel in order to get Internet access. I decide to go out on the town and have a five-part chocolate cake dessert. Each of the parts has a different unusual flavoring (rosemary-ginger, blood and plums, sour cherries, and so on) and is served in a wine glass. Then I end up drinking something that disorients me, and finding my way back to the apartment is difficult. When I get back, I take a bath, but my towel falls into the bathwater and gets soaked.

1. The whole town is full of busloads of secret agents who are looking for something. So in order to stay out of their way, I decide to spend the day at a children's museum. In various places throughout the museum, there are little displays, all playing a story about a girl at a dance recital who is trying to impress Bruce Wayne. I go to the museum's theater to see what's playing. Nothing interesting is on the list, but I get a ticket anyway. There's a concession stand outside, right next to a "no food or drink inside the theater" sign.

At some point, the scene changes. I'm going up a set of stairs, and by knocking on secret panels, I find myself at a performance hall, where a dance recital is just wrapping up. I ask somebody where I can find a Mr. Wayne, and I'm led right to him. And then we go out for pizza for some reason.

2. I'm baking a pizza at the house of my former baby-sitter. It's half-meatball, half-maple bacon. She eats the whole darn thing. I go outside and sit on a curb, and somehow find myself complaining about my stolen dinner to Bruce Wayne. So he has Alfred make me some sort of tomato-based pasta soup thing.

3. In some sort of weird alternate universe where Bruce's parents survive, but he doesn't, I end up living with them. There's also something about eggs made of a bunch of different colors of quartz.

4. I'm angry at one of my former classmates for trying to read some stories I've written, so I turn into a great big blue fox-demon and scare her off.

5. One of my aunts gets my Legos mixed up with my cousins' Legos, and can't sort them out again.

6. Batman breathes rainbows when he performs CPR.

7. Something about my brother having to hotwire a really tiny car, the whole sky being like a Lite-Brite, and being attacked by a great big blue lizard-monster with a mane of spikes.


Jeez, just how many times did I dream about running into the Waynes? I swear, there were even repeats of the dance recital scenario. However, in retrospect, I must admit Rainbow Breath Batman is hilarious.