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    false awakening

    False Awakening

    1. Third Arm Follies

      by , 07-23-2019 at 04:23 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      The dream begins with a fragment of me being in school and rehashing the beginning of "Fake WILD." This does not cause me to become lucid. A bunch of things that I forget happen until I end up playing a video game that was a knockoff of both Fortnite and Guardians of the Galaxy. (I have never actually played Fortnite, nor have I ever watched Guardians of the Galaxy.) Eventually I stop playing and walk into the bathroom to tidy myself up; I notice that I'm wearing a circular metal-wire pendant a few inches in diameter depicting an upward-facing five-pointed star inscribed in a circle. This causes me to become lucid.

      I am shirtless and standing in front of a mirror (which works just as it does in WL), and the pendant gives me the idea to make a "transformation pendant" that will cause me to grow a third arm. I therefore take off the original pendant and imagine a new one appearing that at first looks like a small quartz crystal but quickly changes to be nearly identical to the old one. I put it on so that it hangs over my chest... and lo and behold, a third arm instantaneously "appears" growing out of the center of my chest! I am able to feel it as though it were a natural part of my body, and after a little effort at first, I can move it around just as well. I briefly wonder why I haven't given myself four arms like several of the Hindu deities, but nothing results from that line of questioning.

      After a minute or so, my baser desires took over, and I decided to retract the third arm by taking off the pendant so that I could make room... to grow a pair of breasts. (Why does this always happen?) I got a little U-shaped piece of stiff metal foil from nowhere having the dimensions of a long piece of tape and put it on my lower abdomen so that it covered my navel; this, I told myself, would cause me to transform in the desired way. Just before anything could happen, I "woke up."

      I was still standing in the bathroom when I awoke; I did not question this at all. I also looked totally normal except for my hair; whereas my actual hair is brown, only several inches long, and well-kept, it was now long, black, greasy, and incredibly unkempt, standing largely upright in the manner of the title character from Edward Scissorhands. Some of it was also drawn back in a little ponytail I didn't remember making so that the haircut overall reminded me of Ranma's from the eponymous anime. I remember thinking about how cool it looked, but I was still concerned about who had made the ponytail, since they must have done it while I was sleeping; I began to suspect that it had been some sort of Asian deity who had "taken favor" on me. (As in real life this would be blasphemy of the highest degree, I don't know how I was able to speak it without issue here...)

      I was disappointed with how greasy my hair was and almost washed it, but decided against it since it was still the middle of the night and far too early in the morning to be splashing cold water over myself. Instead I felt a sudden urge to empty my bladder and tried to do so, encountering some difficulty at first but eventually going until I no longer felt the urge to go. I awoke shortly thereafter, not having soiled myself in any way.

      Updated 07-23-2019 at 04:31 AM by 96429 (Accidentally made yellow color unreadably bright)

      lucid , non-lucid , false awakening , memorable
    2. The Aeneid

      by , 06-30-2019 at 04:41 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I was trying to memorize the Aeneid for some reason. I opened up a Latin copy of it and flipped through some tedious introductory notes that sounded like they had been written in the Roman Empire but were really only a few years old before reaching the Latin text. I planned to translate each line as I read it, but I got bogged down trying to scan the first one, which I believed read "Arma virumque cano qui primo ex litoribus Troiae." Through dream-logic I was able to make up some nonsense about an "elision" between "primo" and "ex" that took out the m in "primo" as well because the Romans nasalized final m's (not true in this case). It also appeared that the editors of the text had made a monumental error and substituted "choiae" for "Troiae," and I began to doubt the accuracy of the copy.

      I awoke standing next to my bed with some kind of small blanket or scarf wrapped around my head and neck. I went to pull my underwear up, but it was too tight, prompting me to do a RC. Guess what happened next... Double vision! I tried to focus exclusively on my eyes and will each field of vision to move so that they aligned properly, but the scarf I was wearing made it difficult to see much. I pulled it off and noticed a bust in the shape of a jackal's head mounted on the wall where there is no such thing in WL. I decided to give up on the vision issue for a moment and try to make the bust come to life, but I didn't really believe it would, so it remained inert. I awoke shortly thereafter.
    3. It Is a Yonic Symbol!

      by , 06-29-2019 at 04:39 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I was on vacation for the past few days. I didn't expect to have any LD activity over that time, but I ended up unintentionally getting a strange DILD, which went as follows.

      I was watching a Looney Tunes-style cartoon about a... thing?... wearing an old-fashioned diving suit (very reminiscent of the Big Daddies from BioShock) that was menacing some animals that lived in the Arctic for some reason. The helmet, which was solid and did not actually contain anything, could open and close like Pac-Man's mouth, which the thing did a few times in order to laugh evilly. Eventually, a white seal, who looked very similar to the seals from the movie Romeo and Juliet: Sealed with a Kiss, decided to "take down" the thing and climbed out of the ocean and up a sheer cliff in an impossible manner to where the thing was standing. The seal jumped at it and pulled it down into the ocean, where it presumably died.

      I awoke in my hotel room shortly after sunrise. The sun was streaming into the room through a roughly elliptical gap between the two curtains, and there was an empty bed to my left, but otherwise the room was unremarkable. I somehow remembered to do a noseplug RC and discovered to my surprise that I could still breathe. Immediately thereafter, I began seeing double (or perhaps triple) and simultaneously got the urge to turn myself into a girl once again. Knowing that that had ended poorly last time, I managed to ignore the urge and tried to stabilize the dream.

      I tried rubbing my hands along the covers of the bed I was in, but that did nothing to improve my vision. Rubbing them together was equally ineffective, and to make matters worse, an unknown force was now drawing me down into the gap between the two beds, which now seemed bottomless. Fortunately, I managed to pull the covers of the bed along with me so that they draped over the gap and stopped me from being pulled any further. From this angle, I looked back at the gap between the curtains and saw that it looked distinctly yonic, which prompted me to think (and possibly say) a few times: "It is a yonic symbol! It is a yonic symbol!"

      I soon realized that I had accidentally become fixated on the primal urge to transform into a girl, which I almost did without thinking before stopping myself just in time; the desire was beginning to warp the dream in order to draw my attention to it and force me to indulge it. I needed to act quickly in order to stabilize the dream, but I only remembered one more viable technique: spinning. I somehow managed to drag myself up onto the bed, stand up on it, and spin around a few times. This unfortunately caused me to wake up immediately.

      Paging Dr. Freud...

      Updated 07-02-2019 at 05:08 AM by 96429

      lucid , non-lucid , false awakening
    4. I Wish... I Hadn't Done That

      by , 06-18-2019 at 04:34 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I am in a mall-like complex of stores and have somehow gained access to three wishes, which are to be granted by a magical swarm of talking bees. Since I have no capacity for rational thought, I waste the first two wishes on mundane items (a book and some kind of food). As I make my third and final wish, for a large amount of honey, I find myself thinking, "Why did I wish for that? This is a dream -- I could have wished for something far better!" Now lucid, I do a noseplug RC to confirm dreaming but forget to pause so I can rise beyond low-level lucidity, instead chasing after the swarm and trying to catch up with them before they get the honey so I can change my wish. At some point I lose lucidity.

      I somehow end up atop a large gray cliff face, beyond which is an infinitely deep black abyss. There are a number of people with me dressed in clothing reminiscent of Dragon Ball Z, and it seems I am to have a duel to the death with someone; whoever falls off the edge of the cliff loses. I win the duel (I forget whom it was against or how I won), but then another opponent wearing distinctively Van-like shoes spontaneously appears at the edge of the cliff and demands to duel with someone else. At this point I am on my hands and knees and fear that getting up may cause me to fall, so I ask someone behind me to grab my feet and pull me backwards. I raise my arms as I move and knock the new opponent off-balance, but he somehow manages to retain a hold on the cliff face. There were some short sticks painted red on one end and blue on the other end, but I forget what they were for.

      I wake up in bed and immediately notice that one of my teeth is loose. IWL there's a place in my mouth where two teeth partially overlap that I fear may one day force one of the teeth to fall out. As my tongue lightly brushes against it, it is yanked out of my mouth and falls into my hand. The tooth is surprisingly large, about the size of a sunflower seed. This whole ordeal is strange and a little frightening, so I do a noseplug RC -- but for some reason, I find I can't breathe! Must not be a dream, then... right? I call my mother into the room to break the news to her and say something about "measuring one of my teeth" before showing her the one that fell out. She points out that at least now I won't have to worry about it falling out anymore.

      At some point I find myself on the outskirts of a city before a huge abandoned fish-processing plant built out of brick and in the Greek Revival style. I want to explore it, but the city looks quite unsafe, and there could well be criminals hiding out in the ruins. I switch to being a DO and get some sweeping fly-through shots of the plant; my viewpoint travels through the arcade comprising its outer wall into a large courtyard with some pillars and fountains in it. As this is happening, I wake up.
    5. Recurring False Awakening

      by , 06-17-2019 at 04:33 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I had an inordinate deal of trouble getting to sleep last night... for some reason, I was insanely excited to LD, far beyond the motivation I normally feel, and so my heart was racing and I couldn't go to sleep. I tried every trick I knew -- reading, mentally reciting various text, meditating, random yoga poses, etc. -- but my body refused to relax in any way. I eventually fell asleep sometime around 4 AM, over four hours after I had gotten in bed.

      I awoke in my bed facing the wall and tried to turn around but found I couldn't move. I felt a strange burning/throbbing sensation in the back of my head. I was eventually able to turn my head painfully slowly towards the rest of my room, and after a minute or so, I was finally able (with considerable difficulty) to rise from my bed and walk towards the door to my room. Before I could reach the door, I "awoke" back in bed again. This repeated at least twenty times; in the dream I seemed to think that by the end I had been through the ordeal four hundred times at least.

      When I finally "woke up" for good within the dream, I found myself in a large single-room house with an assortment of relatives I barely ever see: my maternal grandparents, my uncle, and my old High School History Teacher (not a relative, but she was there for some reason). A few of my siblings were also there. We talked about some mundane topics for a few minutes. Then something happened involving a woman who had engaged in "activism" of some sort by making a video game about freeing animals from zoos. But this was all cut short when...

      I had the recurring FA again! It happened at least another ten times, all the way up to the possible seventy-six I believed had happened within the dream. On one of the FAs toward the end of the cycle, I grabbed hold of a chair in my room as I got up and knocked it over, hearing the loud sound it made as it hit the floor, and said to myself, "That's proof that I'm up for real this time!" It was not, since I rapidly went back to the FA. The worst part was that I didn't do even a single RC, owing to the dream-paralysis that made me unable to...
    6. Fake WILD, Real LD

      by , 06-15-2019 at 04:31 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I am at High School (where's my RC?!) on the second-to-last day of school. Band class has just ended and it's time for me to say goodbye to my longtime Band teacher. I walk up to him and try to shake his hand but find that my shirt sleeve is long and thin and that my hand is unusually moist, causing it to stick within the sleeve and making it nearly impossible to get my hand out far enough. IRL my hands are infamously bone-dry. I eventually manage and apologize for taking so long, but he dismisses the apology as unnecessary. Then someone starts playing "Jack in the Box" by Thomas S. Allen (piece written in 1900 -- I've listened to it a few times IWL) on a nearby piano.

      I leave the classroom thinking that it's the end of the school day while simultaneously heading towards French class because that's the next class I would normally have if the day weren't ending there. The fact that this is a contradiction escapes me, but I do get to thinking about what class I'll actually end the year on and find that it is Psychology. This thought was probably responsible for what happened next.

      I suddenly wake up sometime in the middle of the night -- though I think it might have been as late as 6:00 AM according to a dream-clock. I had set an intention before falling asleep at all to wake up at some point so I could try to WILD, and this seems to be my opportunity. I reposition myself in bed so that I'm the most relaxed I can possibly be, close my eyes, and wait for the HI, sort of getting sidetracked into SSILD somewhere along the way. The HI arrives startlingly quickly -- and soon my eyes are forced open as an unknown force pushes me involuntarily out of my bed, causing me to cry out in surprise, and dumps me on the floor. I somehow remember to do a noseplug RC just in case -- and it works!

      Now at this point I was only low-level lucid, and that was the most lucid I ever got. The dream immediately seemed unstable, so I felt the covers of my bed for a minute and it stabilized. However, my vision was still weirdly blurry and unfocused, a common attribute of the FAs I have in general -- I wear glasses IWL, and my brain probably thinks "I'm not wearing my glasses yet, so of course my vision must be blurry." Fortunately, my glasses were sitting on a table by my bed just as they usually are, so I put them on and the blurriness mostly subsided. The problem was that there was some sort of "tactical overlay" on the left lens of the glasses, and I started to think that a spy agency wanted me to do something. Would I follow the dream-narrative again and lose lucidity?

      Fortunately not -- I began to wonder if I could put my finger through the palm of my other hand, as is commonly suggested, and smacked them together at full speed expecting the finger to go through. It did not. I focused intently on the fact that my hand was now incorporeal and tried again. It still didn't work, but now I had trouble seeing my hands as well. Because my lucidity was so low, I couldn't actually remember any of my dream goals; instead, I stupidly decided to use my limited awareness to indulge a desire I've been trying very hard IWL to manage -- namely, to feel what being a girl would feel like. The main thrust behind this desire, so far as I've been able to determine, is autoerotic in nature.

      I was inexplicably naked now, which made my "task" easy. I pointed at a "certain part" of my body (the one that was doing all of the thinking at the moment) and willed it to collapse inwards, which it surprisingly did, but in an extremely slow and unrealistic "inverting" manner, leaving behind a cylindrical hole as it did so. This proved to be my downfall; the end of it rubbed against the interior of the hole as it moved inwards, arousing me sufficiently that I awoke for real, still very much aroused, at about 7:00 AM.

      The induction method was truly strange, but at least I was lucid... though it seems I'll have to work on achieving higher-level lucidity and remembering my dream goals before I can do much with that.
    7. Dream Miscellany

      by , 06-14-2019 at 04:28 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      The dream starts with me reading the "end" of the Book of Exodus (which in the dream has a short 31st chapter to finish it off). I learn something about the sons of Jacob that I forget now. I move on to reading the beginning of the next book, called "Judah" for some reason, but soon I somehow get to thinking of Adam and Eve, which rouses some memories of Paradise Lost (but here the dream grows hazy).

      The next thing I remember I was in a large "historical reenactment village" (much like Plimoth Plantation) inhabited entirely by talking animals. The animals looked totally normal and realistic; they just happened to be able to talk. I was on a "mission" to go around and get two signatures for a petition to force the village management to restore the ruins of a castle that lay on the outskirts of the area. I poked my head into a small "egg-production plant" made of barkless logs and inhabited by a family of squirrels, but they declined to sign.

      I eventually grew hopeless and left the village, which it turns out had been inside a large museum-like building with a large number of dinosaur fossils on display. The ruins of the castle were also an exhibit for some reason. I told my father of my inability to get enough signatures, and he said that he should have realized earlier that our own two signatures would be enough (this is a paraphrase of something Jesus said in John 8, which I read before falling asleep).

      The continuity breaks horribly at this point as I somehow climb a mountain ridge near the village from before and look down upon it. I can see a huge red church, which I somehow know is called "Chester," with a massive square clock tower reminiscent of Big Ben. I get the idea to build a road up here so that everyone can come see the village, so my mother and I immediately start digging a trench for the asphalt to be poured into. The only thing is we have to make it comply with various regulations, so I get out a computer of some sort and look up the specifications for a road.

      I find that we somehow managed to dig it in the correct shape, but that if I want to operate a radio station from the summit at the end of the road, I'm going to need to comply with further regulations. (No idea why I decided to pursue this thread.) The music played on the station must represent all twelve musical scales roughly evenly, and content must also fit the Even and Odd Numbers Act, which I clicked on for more information. Suddenly we were in a car driving down a road through a mountainous landscape listening to a voice on the radio explain the Act.

      The voice said that even numbers tend to be more "serious," while odd numbers are more "comedic." We were to pass a series of examples illustrating this fact. We first passed two girls sitting by the side of the road with boxes of condoms, offering to hand them out. This was the comedic number one, since one of the girls was holding a single lollipop as well. We then heard audio footage of two people chanting religiously. This was the serious number two. As the number three was announced, we had to drive through a shallow pond for some reason. This was the comedic number three. As the number four was announced, we had to drive through a slightly deeper pond that looked about to spill over the edge of a cliff and inundate the town below. This was the serious number four. I suggested to my mother that the town should dig a tunnel through the cliff face to safely drain the pond.

      After all that had happened, I somehow found myself on what I recognized as the "ocean floor." The sky/water/whatever was above and around us was pitch black, but the ground was faintly radiant and allowed me to see. I was playing a game in which I had to move a large amount of jetsam sitting in a pile into a specific shape, but much of it was far too heavy to move without being able to operate a car that was apparently still in working order but missing its keys. I encountered a talking fish who turned on a nearby TV and played a commercial he had acted in for the drink Muscle Milk; it had a poem-like jingle that I tried desperately to remember. Eventually, I found the keys to the car lying on the ground, but as I was about to turn it on, I had a FA.

      I quickly got up out of my bed (and forgot to do a RC!) I still remembered the poem at this point -- which was only four lines long -- and I went to type it up. However, my mother was in my room for some reason and claimed she needed to use my computer to look up the recipe for something (my little brother used to get mad whenever she needed to do this on the old family computer). I frantically said "I'll write it instead," pulled out a pencil and notepad from nowhere, and began to write; as I was writing, I awoke with no recollection of the poem.
      non-lucid , false awakening
    8. An Offer You Can Refuse

      by , 05-14-2019 at 04:10 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I awoke from a previous dream that I forget and was lying on my back in bed. I was looking at myself from several different perspectives; my viewpoint kept bouncing back and forth between my actual head and a point a few feet above and behind it. While I was "in my own head," I noticed something like a mass of shadow hovering just above and behind me. Once I became a DO again, I could see that this thing was a vaguely humanoid shape of darkness and appeared to be wearing a "spy hat" (that's the best way I can describe it).

      After a brief pause, my POV went back into my head and stayed there permanently. The thing then spoke to me in a deep but quiet voice and told me it was going to "bring me higher" and "show me great things." It proceeded to grab hold of my head and try to pull me upward, as though it were going to spirit me away on some sort of mystical journey. I was intensely curious as to what it was going to show me, but at the same time, I feared that it was somehow malevolent and planned to lure me into some kind of weird spiritual trap, so I resisted its pull.

      The thing kept pulling harder and harder, and it was very difficult to keep from being lifted up -- I began to feel as though it were pulling the soul right out of my head in an attempt to induce an OBE and force me to come with it. Eventually I managed to break free from its grasp, whereupon I got out of bed and tried to walk across the room to where my brother lay sleeping. The thing did not disappear; in fact, it continued to try to get me to come back by making me extremely tired, so that it was difficult to keep my eyes open wide enough to see. At long last I reached the other end of the room, my vision cleared, and it went away.
    9. Fake Sleep Paralysis

      by , 03-02-2019 at 03:46 AM (What Will Lisez Today?)
      I was in a large spiral-shaped museum with my mother and brother (dreamsign right there!) and ascending the museum counterclockwise by traversing a large glass hallway running up and around its circumference. I passed a number of eye-shaped "interactive sculptures" (that moved or lit up if touched) on the way, but eventually, my mother and brother decided it would "take too long" to get all the way to the top and got me to turn back.

      (Jump) I was then playing a roguelike computer game centered around the life of the Biblical Adam. It boasted pixel graphics and no sound and was generally reminiscent of Dwarf Fortress. I had been playing the game on the developer's website for weeks and had earned 70 of the 72 in-game achievements there before buying it on Steam and continuing to play it there. I was getting frustrated because I couldn't figure out how to get the final two achievements. Then, while I stared at the menu screen for the game, a large "flooding" effect filled the screen, and I got an achievement called "The Flood." When I reopened the game, I saw that all of the terrain had become wet, and rushing torrents of water had altered the geography of many areas. I was concerned because I could no longer find Eve, and in order to win it was necessary to ensure that she stayed alive until the birth of Seth.

      (Jump) Some time later, I was hired by the proprietor of a bar/brothel (not actually sure which) as some sort of waiter/busboy. I spent most of my time waiting in a metal "great hall" behind the main customer area of the bar; the back door into the bar had a large pink neon sign over it reading "18+." I had been summoned to meet with the proprietor, but I had to change my clothes first, so I entered a small room on the right side of the hall to use the "clothes changing machine," which consisted of two parallel metal rollers with blunt studs on them (like one of those old roller-based washing machines).

      I lay down on the floor, which was a conveyor belt moving towards the rollers, with my feet towards the machine and let myself be carried back into it, whereupon my clothes were changed by some unknown mechanism (though I don't remember what I changed into). I was then "ejected" like a VHS tape back out of the room and into the hall. I entered the proprietor's office, where my mother also was for some reason, and listened to him talk for some time about his "cosmological theory," which consisted mainly of the assertion that most of H. P. Lovecraft's stories were secretly true. He then told me to change into my "work uniform" and get back to work, but my mother frantically yelled after me, "Don't go back into the machine! The wages of sin is death! It's deadly!"

      This is where things start getting strange.

      My mother had been too late to stop me; by the time I heard her warning, I had already lay back down on the conveyor belt, and although I tried to crawl away from the machine, the conveyor was going too fast for me to escape. I suddenly "realized" that I was only dreaming, and that I wasn't actually going to die (though I didn't actually comprehend the implications of that fact). I took off my glasses and threw them onto a small pedestal in the front left corner of the changing room so that they wouldn't hurt me by being crushed into my face when I went through the presumably now-deadly machine, and I expected the dream to end as soon as I entered the rollers and "died." I then passed through the rollers and was ejected into a space of absolute nothingness.

      I felt a "falling" sensation as though I were drifting back into my body, and soon I was lying back in my bed. I could feel that SP was in effect (or so I thought), as well as a strange tingling sensation engulfing my whole body, and I was seeing some strange HI (one particularly memorable image was of a circular pattern of green geometric shapes that I got the impression was some sort of "cosmic symbol"). The paralysis and imagery soon faded, whereupon I arose from my bed to look around. I estimated that it was around 2:00 AM, though I couldn't see any clocks around, and a can of Diet Coke had somehow appeared resting on my desk. I felt strangely compelled to drink the Diet Coke, but I knew that I would have trouble getting back to sleep if I did. While still thinking about what to do, I realized that I had already opened and begun to drink the Diet Coke without noticing it, and so I decided I might as well finish the can and try to get back to sleep.

      I lay back down in bed and passed out nearly instantly, "awaking" the next morning with no disruption to my stream of consciousness. I got up and went into the kitchen to eat breakfast, where I saw my mother again looking at a series of envelopes that had apparently arrived just then and were all addressed to me. I picked up a plastic bowl of minestrone soup and began eating it as I looked at the envelopes. They were from every single college I had ever applied to, even including some I had never considered attending in WL, and they were all letters of rejection.

      I remember specifically that Dartmouth turned me down because I had forgotten to fill out a "math supplement," which they had included an unfinished copy of as proof. It looked reminiscent of a standard multiple-choice test, and the questions were laughably easy. Another college whose name I forget made a number of puns on conjugations of the French verb faire (e.g. "Looks like you won't be drinking from the font of knowledge anytime soon!"). I decided this deserved a reply in kind and began writing one, in French, with a pencil on the inside rim of my soup bowl. I had completed a sentence or so when I put my spoon back into the bowl to eat some more soup, which caused the broth to splash onto the words I had written and erase them.
      non-lucid , false awakening