seandevlin

i was at the airport. i knew that i had had this dream before. i was on the escalator, i ran into people that i knew when I was younger. there was a girl on the escalator next to mine. she was with someone who my friend said was the smartest man on the planet. very handsome, though the girl with him was even more beautiful. i shook hands with the man, he was unimpressed. i recognized the girl and her I. i told her I remembered meeting her before, she told me she did too [knowing that she understood I meant in another dream]. as we got off the escalator she started to get panicked. I asked her to come with me, she said she couldnt her parents were picking them up. the man was smiling the whole time, unconcerned. eventually she came with me, or did i go with her.. i can not remember. we were on a hill, not a grassy hill, a street, but there were beds. we were having sex, the other man, or another man, was also having sex with her. he left, we stopped having sex. it was not a sexual dream though, it did not feel like anything. we were lying in bed, things get hazy..

now my brother was with us. my brother, rob, suddenly started throwing up. I could tell she was feeling sick too, i cant recall if she threw up as well. we started to tell him to throw up in the street, not on the beds. In my dream I knew that this had happened before. I told them it must be from the pizza we ate, as that was what happened last time, although we had not eaten in this dream. I went up the hill to tell mom, asking her if she was sick, she looked sick, i told her to throw up and she would feel better. she told me she had been throwing up as had rob, she was coming out of a doorway that I assumed was a bathroom. I began to tell her that all this had happened before other, except last time there was a few minor differences [like last time there was no clean clothes to wear, I had the idea that I was naked although I was not. this time there were piles of clean laundry which I began to throw around as I explained to her that things were different this time]. when i turned back I saw my sister, jen, about to hit a brick wall with a sledge hammer. each time she touched the wall with the hammer it glowed red. i could almost see a cross in the brick wall. I ran down in a panic and told her not to, couldnt she see that the wall was turning red each time she touched it. I took the sledge hammer from her. as I did the wall, there was an old metal link on it, under the link were raised bricks, these bricks opened and closed like a door when I had the hammer. mom gasped and said ‘did you see that’. jen was confused as to why I didnt want her to hit the wall, she did not see that hidden door open. she and rob backed away and up the stairs, the wall this time was glowing red regardless of being touched. all of a sudden the floor beneath me started to shake and the air got very warm, it was hard to breathe. I started to back away, saying I could hardly breathe. they all said they felt the same way. then the ground burst open, like a trap door. I grabbed what appeared to be a frame with a door on it, I stood over the open ground which had fire beneath it and was very warm, hot air coming from beneath the hole. I started to say in a voice not my own, very deep and loud “get inside, get inside!” as if yelling at the bed energy to go through the door i was holding. suddenly mom started to laugh almost hysterically. i could feel energy passing from the hole in the ground, through the door i was holding and going back into the ground. i backed away, fearing that nothing productive was happening. suddenly, a face appeared in the hole in the ground, looking like a demon smiling. the face also looked like it was painted onto a piece of plastic. i suddenly got confused as if this was all a joke. then the face broke out of the hole. it was a small yellow balloon with a face painted on it with little legs, and it started to walk around. i ran down and attempted to stomp on it and missed. then i suddenly awoke. when I awpke I had an urge to cross myself.

i was being outcast by my friends. i had this pile of paper that i was going to light on fire and everyone was worried something bad would happen. so i decided to jump onto the pile which was suddenly a small island in the middle of this sewage, dark lake. the entire dream had a dark, dirty feel to it. i cant remember much.

i was at nancys house and trying to bake a cake. robert was there heating up food. i was looking at a mirror that opened up to search the internet, and i remember telling someone that you could go online with anything these days. monika showed up and everyone was surprised, she was dressed real nice. i talked to alli on the phone and mentioned seeing her and we had a good talk and she told me that she was seeing someone, that it had been so long, and i said that was okay. her sister was there along with another friend, at nancys, and it made me feel uncomfortable.
we went out to the pool and i was invisible, carson and monika were talking about me and how i could let go of anger so easily. monika said one time she came out to the pool and i was just floating there, on fire, and then all of a sudden my hair was wet. this realy shocked carson, they started to kiss. then i appeared and said i saw them. i said they could kiss if i could have sex with monika while they did it. i devided i couldnt do this and instead of kept pushing their heads underwater. then i drowned them. during this time i felt like i was invisible. i could see their bodies floating in the pool from up above and i went inside to where i had a son, he was asleep so i layed him on the couch and was going to lay with him so they would not think i drowned them, but instead i got up and went to the table. i picked up this device that had two scrolls hidden inside it, along with a key, and was shaped like a cross. I started walking down the street barefoot, to bury it. while i was doing this a narration was going on about how they had this all planned from the beginning. the scrolls read the truth of their lives, about how one of them was abandoned by her parents when she was young, etc..
i passed two kids [18yrs.]leading a group of younger boys[10yrs.], down the road. the young boys were repeating what the older boys were saying, it was a religious procession and they were dressed very nicely. they were chanting things i cannot remember but i chimed in something along the lines of 'to get a real life' and the young boys imitated it, which the older boys laughed at. at the back of the line were to quiete older clergy men, dressed as how the pope dressed. a white van drove past me with plants in the back and ran through a cast iron gate and then i remembered that either this was a dream that showed the perspectives of different people, [as if, i watch the van crash through the gate. then i am viewing things from the drivers perspective and he takes it to the next scene. then when he gets to the house i am watching it through the person who is at the house' perspective]. or that i recently had a dream which was that way and that this dream was melding into that one.
i bury the item with the hidden scrolls in it and think of how i know who is going to find it, a young girl that was in a previous dream i had. then i wake up.

i was going to school with my brother and sister and we missed the bus. we went to the supermarket with jerry and mom. they had a huge glass wall that said car saver and when something was about to hit the wall with enough speed it went through the wall, as if the wall was electronic glass. they also sprayed the rugs with what looked like spray paint and would spry it in the air. i wanted to leave while they were waiting for a prescription jerry wrote to himself, so i went outside and was crossing the st when i woke up


#2 i was on a bus/rv with a few other people and we saw wild birds, a cheetah, and other wildlife. the birds were biting us and trying to get into the trailer. the cheetah was outsisde the window and kept jumping up to it and i was concerned it would jump through the window. there were a few people there one was making breakfast the others were walking around outside or taking photos of the animals with me

#1 carson and i are at the beach. she walks off with a friend of hers and i stay behind. talking to this man about things, like the beach, the area, and carson. she comes back and starts applying makeup to her neck, says she got a hickey from making out with her friend. i tell her that thanks for not making out with me ever and instead making out with a random friend at the beach. i decide to leave and go back to where we are staying, as i turn a girl walks up to me and make a gesture or comment about how i am attractive and she is interested in me. i dont react and head back to where we are staying. its strange because carson and i are currently dating but in the dream it was as if we were broken up for some time.

#2
i am pretending to be a bike messenger and i arrive at a building.out front is an unlocked ed bike and i take it. i go into the bathroom and there are sodas in the fridge that look fancy and i decide to steal some. there is a backpack under the desk so i start emptying it out. in my head or down the hall i hear someone saying that the bag has been left there fo rmonths, so i feel less guilty about it. i take the bag and on my way out a woman calls me by name. i do not recognize her but i pretend that i do and we chat for a minute. i got outside and there is a nice looking blue bike. it seems perfect for me and i let ryan check it out. as i watch him it turns into a green car. he does some trick with it as it changes back into a bike an dwhen he hands it to me, its not a fold-up scooter. i tuck it into the straps of my backpack and hop on my red bike. as im riding down the street my front teeeth start to hurt, it feels like they are pushing against the helmet. i take it off and strap it to th ebasket. corey hits a rough patch and flips over his handlebars. we are returning to coolidge st and i am worrid about being seen on a stolen bike. i have a daydream about what i would do if i was seen.

when i wake up my teeth hurt, as if ie been pressing them against each other.

i am at carsons mom house, yet it is a diffferent house. i keep playing the same cd over and over. i find a nail and they tell me that it detects where there is no gravity by pushing itself into the casing around it. i think this is awesome. there is a dog there that i play with.

in my dream i am walking around a town tha ti have dreamed of being in before. there is a flea market on a street that is there everyday, the residents sit outside their houses and sell didfferent things. i see two shirts that have space on them and ask about them, saying i will return tomorrow. i see a very sad woman who works there and try to console her, yet she doesnt feel comforted. after her family comes and comforts her and i am walking home, she hands me a barbell for a piercing and thanks me. i walk hom and on the way see two tornados in the sky. i go into the basement where my brother and mother are. we wait and when the tornadoes get close the ceiling of the basement falls down and nearly crushes my skull. i call jerry who is at a sports game to tell him what happened and ask him what to do next, the connection is broken up and he doesnt offer me any help. i go next door but their ceiling is more caved in than ours. i start piling things up near the door to act as beams and while doing this i see other people in our basement, uttering words in a strange tongue. my mom comes over to me and says they are trying to release something. we run outside and see all these weird creatures roaming around in mud, they have blue heads with tubes on them and are crawling on their bellies, look like alien hyenas. we go to hide under another house and see that my brother has become one. we run next door and everyone has already become one of these strange creatures. i try to protect my mother and i get bitten by one and transform, but i am aware and i start protecting my mother from them. at first i need to fight them but then i start gaining in strength and can just howl at them to get them to go away. i start sending these shockwave blasts out to get many of them away from her at once. i am getting very powerful and am fighting them off and they dont like it. then the tornados end and we change back, saying that the spirit is done protecting us. my mom never gets transformed because i did so well protecting her. but because i am so powerful i do not transform back like everyone else.

in my dream i was arguiing with my mother and she tossed down a stapled stack of papers, which i threw back at her. the corner hit her in the right eye and gave her a papercut. my brother his friend and his father were there and we all got into the car to take her to the hospital. while in the car i was arguing with my brothers friend, who was 13 as well as my brother, and it was very frustrating. my brothers father was driving and after a moment we realized my mother was not in the car. i jumped out and ran back to get her and along the way i ran into marcia [my aunt]. marcia was dressed as a hospice worker and was taking care of older people on gurneys, in what looked like a tree house that was on the ground, or a childrens playground with many wooden half walls and places to jump over and through. she came back with me to get my mother and then ushered her to an area to take care of her. my grandmother was also there. on the way back, seperately from them, there were monsters and ghosts. the ghosts would suck out what looked like the persons ghost form, from a hole in the ground. the monsters were attacking people though not in an overtly violent way and people did not seem scared, just trying to avoid them. one monster had me in its mouth but then let me go. at the end of the dream we all came to my mother whose eye was now a small light blue button and she told me that certain abilities came with it, though did not say which ones.



later that day i had lunch with my aunt who i have had very little contact with in my life and she told me her plans to go to school for hospice care. my dreams seem to often be signs of what is happening in others lives and such.

I was looking for a gun in a home I was staying in, but the bed and the furniture were outside, as if the home had no walls or ceilings yet I was still considering it a home. I told the person that I was with that although we look down on guns, they are needed for home security and I had an impending feeling that something was going to happen where I needed one. I eventually found one behind the bed though it was a BB gun and I knew that I would not be able to stop whatever was coming.

[at this point i woke up and went back to sleep]

i was in a very run down building which looked like an old auto parts warehouse. there was a fence along the front yard with many spider webs in it that were very very large. the spiders on the webs were bigger than i am and in a multitude of colors. the man I was with said he was my father, though he looked nothing like my father and I looked nothing like myself. I helped him put all the trash from his small rundown house into a pile which he lit on fire. We then walked down the street to a small store and bought a six pack of beer. On the way back we passed a group of men sitting out front and he told them quietly that he was my son. They looked at me and smirked, all looked dirty and the way that 'trailer park trash' people are portrayed. We walked past them and next door were two muscular black men arguing with a black woman, in front of what appeared to be a small aircraft hanger, though inside were sleeping bags and it looked like they were camping out. I got the unmistakeable feeling that they were some kind of voodoo religion. We passed them and walked through the yard and my mother, who did not look anything like my actual mother, came out and said we had to leave. Her and my 'father' started to argue and he started pulling her hair and off her clothes. She was resisting and very distraught and they ended up going into the area with the rusted car parts. I got the feeling that he was going to rape her so I looked around for something to stop him with. I found a large wrench and tried to sneak around, waiting so that he would not see me. At this point I was almost experiencing this out of body. It was hard for me to get to a place where I could do something and not be seen and as I was realizing this she picked up a weapon and started hitting him with it, though I could not see what damage she was doing as my vision was blocked. I then saw his hand reach out and grab the weapon and he came into view, then with a cold distant look in his eyes he started to hit her on the back of the head. I ran and jumped into his car which I then drove down the road. At this point I was seeing this from a third perspective as well as seeing it through the eyes of the boy I was supposed to be. I was driving down the road and not doing too well a job of it, hitting other cars and going off road, as if I was too young to have learned how to drive. Then I awoke.

The person I was in the dream was not me, nor the mother and father as mine, and the area did not look familiar to my waking life. The only thing that was familiar to me was that I have had this dream before, yet without the rape and murder of my 'mother'. I am not sure if I just do not remember that part, but as I was walking to the store and cleaning out his house, I remember feeling, in the dream, that this was not my first time there. When I awoke I vaguely remember certain instances, like getting the beer, happening in a dream I have had before.
This isn't the first time that I have had the same dream more than once with different outcomes.

i was in a town where everything was a pale shade of yellow and blues. the cars, the bikes, the houses. everything was neatly manicured and 'where it should be'. the cars were all rounded and the bikes as well, everything looked cartoonish and bubbly, the colors 2d. the hills were very steep and we were on bikes, i was following a young boy and girl. they would ride down the hills on their bikes with no care in the world, where as i applied the brakes and had some fear, though on the last hill i rode it to the bottom. gravity and other laws of the world did not seem to apply, as i slowed down gently and quickly when i applied my brakes instead of slamming into the house at the end of the road. i separated from them and was riding around in backyards. many of them had pools. at one yard they had what looked like a small bridge going over their pool, i tried to bunny hop onto the bridge as it wasn't connected on the sides and fell into the pool. the water was forcing me to the other side of the pool into what felt like a suction, at that end. i felt that if i didnt get out i would be sucked down into it. i managed to climb out and was dripping wet. i left the bike in the pool and went wandering. in-between two houses i came to a very small area which had broken bricks on the ground and green moss and grass, i remember thinking this is the first time i saw vivid colors. it felt as if the entire town was a set-up, a fake place, and that i found an area that they hand't gotten to yet. [in a dream the previous night i was in a town that felt the same way, although dark, and came to an area that felt more 'real' than the one i was in].hopping around in the water were little fish and i wanted to grab one to show to the kids, for some reason this was important [like i had to show them that vivid life existed]. i continued wandering and eventually found the kids. we went into a building which is where their father worked and on the table in the building was a small birthday cake, i ate some with my hands, thinking it didn't really matter if i followed rules of etiquette. i went wandering room to room. in the first room was a young girl of 15 who was laying on the bed touching herself, fully dressed. she had just gotten off the phone with who i thought was her bf. i remember lifting up her shirt as she looked at me charmingly. i left that room and looked into the next room and saw a man holding a baby lying on the bed next to who i assumed was his wife and behind them, an older woman, who was staring at me vacantly, but not positively, as if i had invaded their space or that she knew i didn't belong in this reality. i shut the door and went to the next one which had a man and woman, about 19, spooning each other. out of the last room walked a young naked black girl, who i directed to the room with the other young girl, who by now was openly masturbating. i started to feel like this was a dream while thinking that if i stayed, and came, that i couldn't remember where i was sleeping and did not want to make noises or night-emissions in my clothing in my sleep if i was somewhere that wasn't 'appropriate'[a friends house or the like]. i left them and walked outside. i asked the father how i wake up from the dream and he told me to say Letter, 'like the kind you mail bombs in', though he pronounced it 'letteh'. i gave it a try though i did not wake up. i went outside and met with a young blond girl with straight bangs. i started to fly by the same motions of swimming and we floated into the air. we were flying around and i felt very free, knowing i could do anything. i told her as much and as we were flying i told her "look around, it is the sea". i closed my eyes and when i opened them again we were above the sea with sailboats beneath us. i imagined boston and then we started to approach it, though a boston that was more dark and dirty feeling. as we started to come down, on a highway, i told her we could do anything and jump as high as we wanted. we jumped onto a building which was moving up and down and started to run through them. i eventually lost the girl and came to an area where Mallory was working. she was setting up shelves in what looked like a fine foods warehouse. her boss told me that i could not interact with her, as she was working. i walked over to her to tell her i was dreaming and when i went to kiss her, i woke up.

before that dream i remember sitting in a place that resembled coolidge st [previous apartment], there was a cute blond girl there that i was interested in. she had spent the night, as we had a big sleepover, and left her bag. i was waiting beside it for her to return and we started talking. i remember watching her from afar the night before, preoccupied with something that i can not now remember.

next thing i know i am at a baseball field with my brother and his father. they are pitching mounds of grass to me which i am hitting with a baseball bat. further away is a group of younger teen boys and girl all flirting with each other. i tried to hit them with the balls but continued to miss and could see one of the girls sliding her shorts to the side and touching herself. my brother and i laughed about this.

earlier than that i was at a family party, though not my own family, the gaucher family[my step-brothers side], watching old home videos that eddie[step-dads brother] had made. we were sitting around a tv eating food, my sandwhich kept coming undone, someone handed it to me and it was a mess.

we were crossing a body of water on a small boat, my brother his father, i and a girl. there were many bubbles in the middle with white water, as if there was liquid nitrogen in it. as we made it to the other side we saw a deserted town with broken down cars and buildings everywhere we looked. my brother was there as well as his father. we were looking around for weapons, vehicles, answers. we saw a few people who were wearing masks and did our best to avoid them. after a while more and more people started to appear, they all said that they woke u in this place and had no idea how they got there. there was one plot of land that was 'normal', a man was on it and ignored us, as if we were on a movie set and were just actors. it resembled a gas station and there were camera crew lights, the man was dressed very proffesionally and I felt that something was amiss, as if I was on the verge of becoming aware that I was dreaming. I walked away and we found a building with cats in it, the cats were talking to us and it was very 'off' feeling. as we stepped over this invisible boundary, necklaces we were wearing and had not noticed until then started to vibrate on my brother and another guest. they said that they heard a voice say something in a riddle, along the lines of 'now you are trapped'. my brother, after looking around the house, wanted to leave as i did. the energy was not right. Bennet [old roommate] was playing guitar and looked sad, said he was not leaving and I got the impression he would stay there until he died, playing a sad song. we tried to pass the invisible boundary and my brother could not, though i could as well as the girl that came with us.

friday night dream.
I was walking with corey and told him that the night before i had a dream in which he was shooting at me, and asked him why he was doing this. i then realized that i did not have this dream and felt a moment of confusion as i couldnt quite grasp that this dream had occured in reality, and not in my dream life.

thursday night dream.

#1, i was walking by a house which had a few of my friends in it. there was a tall, skinny black man who was picking a fight with my friends and his friends started to beat them up. i went to the neighbors looking for help and a large black man came to the door and told me he couldnt help. by the time i went back over to the house my friends were in they had beaten up the black boy. his chest was caved in but he was still breathing and i told them that we were now going to get into trouble. I had a feeling he would be okay and walked out, feeling bad that I was not able to help him or stop the fight and that I had left to get someone else to help.

#2 i was shot at by corey [old friend I havent spoken to in some time] and my brother robert. i kept asking them why they were shooting at me, being very emotional about it, yet they wouldn't answer me/didn't know why. then a gang came into the yard we were standing in with guns and bags of money and chased down carson [gf] and i, we ran through fence after fence to avoid them. the gang ended up getting killed and i walked up to corey and told him he should give me some of the money in the bags for shooting at me. The scene resembled a prison yard.