WhyAmINaked

Well, I had a pretty elaborate dream.

I dreamed I was in an ancient Chinese setting as a general again. I'm currently in the market place of a major city, and the view is isometric style like a DOS RPG game, and I'm going around point-and-click style, solving side quests; only in this case, each and every side quest is basically challenging some right bastard to a duel, in which my vision shifts to a combat screen (the view is still isometric, and the combat screen's background recycles the same "market" image). It reminds me a lot of Koei's Sangokushi V's duel screens, and I was able to check my combat rating via Dream Knowledge stat screen; I'm a 95 -- sweet! Also, I'm such a nerd.

So ANYWAYS, Dream Knowledge tells me I'm already pretty immersed in side-questin', and the first combat that I "participated" in was against some thugs terrorizing the market place. I won pretty handily, and I also like the blue/red/white outfit I'm in. Also, in "world map" view, I walk around on foot, but the second I'm in combat, I'm riding around on a white horse. Also, combat is very pixelated. Again, such a nerd.

My second side-quest duel has me fighting a rival general serving some other warlord. I open up the stat screen again and saw that his combat rating is about 73 (or something along those lines). So of course I kick his ass.

My third side-quest has me fighting a scholarly-looking guy who challenged me. I pull up my handy Dream Knowledge Stat Screen, and his combat stat is 97. Dammit, it's a trap! Also, my health hasn't recovered fully from my previous two fights before. So I pause my fight against him, grind on random encounters (my dream is a fan of old-school JRPG's, apparently) until one of the rare-drops a special sword that boosts my combat rating, and THEN continue my fight against the scholar guy. But wait, I forgot to refill my HP! Fortunately, I catch a break when I get a lucky roll (also, my brain is a D&D nerd now) of the dice, except the dice are Dominoes tiles; I "roll" a six (the max value) and my opponent rolls a one. That allows me to perform some crazy super move to beat the guy, which allows me to level-up, refill my HP, AND improve my base combat rating to 97 (not including the bonus from my drop). Sweet!

I fight the Boss Thug next, which isn't nearly as tough. His special thing is that he's running around with a pack of dogs and terrorizing the people in the market. In the fight, I just whistle really sharply, which scares away five of his dogs each time. Three rounds of whistling later, all his dogs are gone. He surrenders.

My last side quest triggered when I noticed a new NPC hanging out near a stand. She's a lady wearing a widow's outfit, and when I talk to her, I get a single text bubble that explains she is forced to marry someone, and will I help her? Yes/No.

I choose Yes, and suddenly, her fiancee appears. Turns out he's a court adviser and powerful sorcerer who, upon entering the combat screen, transforms into the form of a dragon made out of goddamned lava; the upper-half of his human form is visible in the dragon's aura, and is able to cast spells. Oh, poop.

Luckily, this lava dragon sorcerer guy had one unfortunate fatal flaw: he has an overly elaborate attack animation, and I just "jab" at him so that I keep interrupting his attack while I chip his HP away. Yes, again, giant nerd. After winning, the sorcerer guy is temporarily stunned, and I escape with the lady on horseback to the country side. Apparently, the country of this world is made entirely of candy, and at one point in our flight from the city, we passed by Yoda's hut and the Witch's candy house from Hansel and Gretel. That was pretty sweet (heh heh).

It's also at this time I had a costume change, and it's pretty cool according to my brain. It's a mixture of medieval Europe white/silver plate armor, but with early Chinese terracotta styling. It also features use of fur that matches the scheme, and some sort of cape/scarf. Sadly, when I tried to sketch it while I was awake, I realize that my dream keeps creating contradicting details (i.e. the shoulders would shift between having a fur trim to plate armor to robed covers).

ANYWAYS, Dream Knowledge reveals that the lady was forced into a political marriage to form an alliance, and my meddling has already caused an uproar. The bright side is, the two nations ally anyways over their mutual desire to see me captured, so... glad to be of help? The wedding dowry was also apparently 40 tanks, and I'm suddenly in an infomercial-esque screen while the lady describes how powerful these modern tanks are. Because yes, I'm sure fucking tank shells are pretty handy against spearmen. I also know that Miracle Pans from Mr. Show are up next in the infomercial. Nicely done, subconscious!

I somehow end up chasing after a tank on horseback, Indy in Last Crusade style. I leap on the tank and grab on like I'm climbing around in Shadows of the Colossus, complete with looking for a weak point to stab. But sadly, I wake up from this dream before I could find the glowing sigil.

Oct 28
Can't remember what happened in my dream, but whatever it was woke me up at 4:30

The dream starts with me as the student of an evil samurai -- Kibagami Genjuro, specifically, from the Samurai Shodown series. We are strolling along what I assume are the streets of Edo at night, and there's a light rain. To our left is the base of the castle/wall, and there is a river/moat(?) to the right. We walk under a willow and/or cherry blossom tree (my dream switches them up randomly for funsies) in a small garden patch with a stone lantern, and I recall climbing the tree while Genjuro drinks from a giant bottle of wine.

As we are walking around being all samurai-y, we somehow get invited to a posh, contemporary house by an early 30's, he-likes-football-she-likes-Mimosas type couple. The house is a big, single-story house, and we are in a giant kitchen that has a view of the backyard through the sliding glass doors. We chit-chat a bit on the counters, and the husband takes Genjuro outside to look at his sweet grill.

Dream Knowledge tells me the wife secretly flirts with everyone, and does it precisely because she knows her husband will get insanely jealous. And while her husband and Genjuro are outside, she begins flirting with me and Genjuro (who, by dream logic, is able to be in two places at once?). It's about this time her outfit changes into a set of pretty goddamn slutty workout clothes. I react exactly like Ferris' dad from Ferris Bueller's Day Off when Sloane flirts/messes with him in the cab. Meanwhile, the husband is right by the giant glass sliding door, and would have a clear view of everything if he's not so fixated with the grill.

But then, he calls me to join him outside alone (Genjuro is no longer defying space-time and is now just inside the kitchen now), and there's a creepy vibe about him. I think he knows what's going on, and isn't too happy; but instead, he just talks to me about his grill. He then gives me a tour of his backyard, which is so big that there is are wooden walkways all about. At one end of the walkway, we see a couple of Blue Jays that the couple keeps as pets. He summons one of the birds to him, and for some reason, it's at this time I realize I have an owl friend (who just kinda exists briefly). As I marvel at the bird, the husband turns to me and says, "You know... birds see everything."

I take that as a sign to leave. There are other guests all of a sudden, and they grow exponentially hostile from their sudden existence like dream extras in Inception.

Things kind of escalate from here.

The backyard grows larger, and I'm at the side of the fence. Directly in opposite of me in front of the glass doors is Scorpion from Mortal Kombat, and, yep, he shoots his spear thing at me. I all of a sudden have a katana in my hands, and charge at Scorpion. Suddenly, I'm fighting the entire cast of the evil characters from Mortal Kombat. Well, shit.

I take to the upper terraces of the garden to get away, and suddenly I'm platforming along bamboo platforms supported hundreds of feet above ground, next to mountains that look like it comes out of a Chinese watercolor painting. I'm leaping and hopping hundreds of feet, and I distinctively remember going so fast that I'm very concerned about my landing.

I wake up after a few bounds, confused as fuck what the hell my brain is doing.