Dragging my Mind Over the Gap Between Is's

Saturday, June 25th

I. Sarcastic Mother

My memory of this dream starts with a family gathering at the house in which I grew up. This seems completely normal to me although I have not lived there in some time. I begin to get suspicious of my surroundings, however, when my mother says something to me that is uncharacteristically sarcastic, something along the lines of “Oh, you’re HILARIOUS!” I walk upstairs into my bedroom and I do a reality check, and the one that has always worked for me fails this time. I look at my hands and they look completely fine. Unfortunately I do not engage my surroundings any more, so I now know what to work on with genuinely questioning reality during the day.

Next thing I know I believe I am in a different house and I find out that my A.D, my 19 year old ex-girlfriend is engaged to the 55 year old CEO that she is currently living with (The relationship is a physical reality, the engagement to the best of my knowledge is not, yet. This is something that’s kind of been messing with my head lately.) This distresses me in the dream enough that I no longer think about questioning the reality around me…

So when I am suddenly in a car on my college campus near the Arts building with H.M and C.G telling them about what I have just written down (and I'm now remembering that H.M's head was shaved) it does not strike me at all as out of the ordinary. The dream, or at least my memory of it, ends just about here.

II. The Couch

The premise of this dream is based on another physical reality situation. The gig I just got done with was withholding 20 percent of our pay as a security deposit for the house that the band was staying in. The couch I slept on the first few nights made me sick, so for a short while we were contemplating how to remove the couch from the house and keep it outside without getting it so messed up as to lose the deposit.

In the dream, however, I am walking deep in some swampy woods with S.B trying to find a place for this couch – it’s a different couch from the one in the house though. S.B is dragging it deeper and deeper into the woods and I am going along with him while saying (apparently a bit too passively) “I really don’t think we should keep it out here, there’s got to be a better place for it.” This goes on for quite awhile until I say it more urgently. Sean finally stops and turns to me saying “Are you serious?” I get angry. “YES! I’ve been serious this whole time!”

Suddenly Jim Lahey from the show Trailer Park Boys drives up in a cop car. He jumps out and storms toward me, demanding to know who gave me the money for the police uniform. I look down and I am suddenly indeed wearing a police uniform. This shocks me awake quickly. I think this is reflective of how sometimes, with very irresponsible behavior happening all the time around me, simple requests often make me feel like a hard-ass for the “rules.”