Hey, thanks for responding.

...you see yourself as the personification of evil.
Well, that or I don't consider Lucifer to be evil.

...ex-cherub, recast as your secretary...
Gaudium (the ex-cherub) is a character in a comic book. He's already a demon, but I suppose that might have been Lucifer's fault to begin with.

Does the option to leave seem ominous (the ominous wooden door) and leading to an even worse situation?
No, I don't leave that way. That's the door to the rest of hell; I'd be going back to earth once I've wreaked enough havoc on the fabric of the universe by letting souls escape their eternal torment.

The teenage boy would represent an emotionally unsettled or rebellious aspect of yourself. The dog would represent a feeling of friendship or loyalty that associates with this type of thinking
.

You keep a dream dictionary open in another window, don't you?

Unfortunately, this rebellious aspect didn't read The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. "Wow, painting building this fence is fun. I wouldn't let anyone else do it for anything!"

That said, I did quit my job a couple weeks ago, and I am moving away for a new one, so kudos on the successful cold-reading.