Thread: L33tsaber's Dream Journal

Nearly forgot my afternoon-nap dream. It involved climbing up a knotted rope until I reached a hayloft, where I found an intricately decorated leather glove depicting the Triforce from the Legend of Zelda games. I found myself thinking, "These gloves don't exist in real life, do they?" So I did the nose-pinch test and sure enough... it was a dream. I had a very difficult time with this one, as every time I fluttered my eyes, I alternated between dream-scenes and seeing my red comforter and the bottom edge of my Fullmetal Alchemist wall scroll, which hangs right above the bed.

Then I realized I needed to use a restroom, so I had to wake up before I could do anything. Again.

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Why is it whenever I realize I'm in a dream, my damn bladder gets in the way of my fun?

1. I'm being followed around by some weird guy who seems to be interested in me, but would force me to live in a corrupt farming society. So I try to get my stuff together and run away.

2. Some weird discipline of martial arts where the proper response to a punch is to zip up your jacket to block it.

1. Reading a rather badly written novel in the first-person perspective, somehow don't manage to notice how horrible it is.

2. Running around the block in my stocking-feet, very quickly and with no effort. When I get back into my garage, there are a bunch of cobwebs that I run into.

3. My alarm clock doesn't go off at the right time.

4. My old classmates forbid me from looking up the history and translations of Snow White, even though they're curious about it. I'm angry because their speculations are rather stupid.

5. Watching Code Geass, except that the Knightmare Frames all had the names of suits from Gundam Wing - Epyon, Tallgeese, Heavyarms, et cetera.

6. Trying to avoid guard dogs and guard ducks by staying in the shadows, I stumble across a power outlet with something plugged into it. One of the dogs barks into it as though it had voice recognition, and suddenly it's a great big winter holiday decoration. There are a bunch of small glasses full of water sitting frozen in a box, and everyone has to try to sell them.

On market day, though, there's trouble. All the ice has melted, and everyone's irritable. Even though water is extremely valuable, that doesn't stop the person sitting next to me from breaking the glasses, and then breaking my eyeglasses. Next thing I know, I'm being held up in the air, kicking and screaming for help, but my voice is kinda wimpy and nobody comes to my rescue.

Then the alarm clock finally goes off, and I wake up.

My dorm room is connected to two supply closets (like the ones holding all the balls and pins and bases and stuff in school gymnasiums) packed full of people and rubber bands.

I start singing "Mandelbrot Set" by Jonathan Coulton, and somehow manage to direct my captive chorus into singing along. It was epic. (And so sad that I'll never find so many people in real life that I could talk into doing that.)

1. I made an amazing fish stew, all from scratch and improvisation.

2. I was back in eleventh grade in my old town, and still being forced to go to CCD. The teacher there made all the students go through this ritual to separate people into categories of "virtuous" and "sinful" involving canvas shoes, a tunnel, and two hot tubs - each student would have to go through the tunnnel while wearing canvas shoes, and then something would happen to send them to one of the two hot tubs.

When I went through, there was a burst of flame from the tunnel, and my hair caught on fire. By the time I'd gotten to the hot tub, the braids I'd been wearing (think Relena Peacecraft from Gundam Wing) had been singed.

Looking around at the rest of the students who'd been categorized as "sinful" had all done up their hair, while the students in the "virtuous" hot tub all had their hair down. So I quickly realized this had all been done on the basis of hairstyle and went on a long rant to the teacher about how unfair and humiliating and dangerous and probably illegal this experiment had been, and how not everyone who puts up their hair is vain. Of course, my words were wasted.

So I tried to find the name of the ritual online, in order to protest it, and it didn't seem to exist.

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Always trust the Catholics to haunt my dreams years after I declare I want nothing to do with them ever again. I wouldn't put it past the eleventh grade CCD teacher to attempt something like that and then ignore all argument against it. Oh, I'm going to be in a bad mood all day being reminded of that guy...

1. BrokenPictureTelephone got a bigger canvas area, more art tools, and a longer time limit. Somehow, I managed to still run out of time on a fairly simple prompt. (Looking back on it now, that's a classic case of "numbers don't work right in dreams, you moron.")

2. Discussing ponds, pollution, and why Frog from Chrono Trigger is the best character ever with someone who sells collectible figures of game characters and whatnot.

3. Ordering breakfast in some bizarre combination between a cafeteria and a barbecue joint. I want sunny-side-up eggs, bacon, and pancakes. All they give me is one really small egg. Somehow, I end up being ten minutes late to class.

4. Running around this creepy old house with a bunch of grassy gardens in nooks on the inside. Everything's dark except for flashes of lightning, and I'm trying to help someone find a place to hide (apparently so she can be with her lover undisturbed). After each hiding spot proves to be worse than the next, she picks a bedroom instead... just to annoy her cousin when said cousin returns.

1. My college banned people from having VHS tapes and beverages in glass containers in the dorm rooms. Which was odd, considering the campus convenience store still sold them. So I had to find a way to hide a bunch of Frappuccino bottles (still full).

2. There was a great hole in the downstairs bathroom leading to a tunnel that goes up to the garage. That's apparently how all the creepy-crawlies kept getting into my bathroom. There was also something about a huge beetle living in the carpet steamer, and a mantis that I hoped would get rid of the spiders.

3. Some lady is teaching a class of people (including me) how to use some weird sort of magic that affects physics in order to get through a bunch of hazards in the woods. I kept failing miserably at the jump, which was supposed to land me at an old barn, yet kept throwing me back to the beginning of the forest. So the teacher drops me off at a house in the city owned by a family with the surname "Wolf".

There were a bunch of people there, and all of them had to wear costume pieces (they gave me an eyepatch) and line up for a photograph. Then they introduced the challenge: They wanted to give away their daughter, a princess-like young lady in a floral-patterned yellow dress, to whomever in the room could survive a "manners-off" (over the course of the evening, anyone displaying a clear lack of tact would be sent home, and the last person left would win). Everybody had another change of costume, and I wound up in a long-sleeve green velvet dress with a leather belt and pearlescent buttons shaped like fangs.

Princess Wolf (for lack of a better name for her) decided she needed me to help her run away before the contest's conclusion. She told me to look at my necklace, a silver one with rubies, which turned out to be a compass. I also had something else around my neck, which seemed to be a stopwatch at one glance, an iPod the next, a calculator, and a cell phone with each successive turn-around, all within a special waterproof case.


...I woke up before we could get very far in the escape.

1. My old high school. It's the last day of classes, so every class was a party with food and games and stuff. For some reason, there's also a gift shop full of plushies, but I can't find my purse. It eventually turns out that I left the purse at home.

2. I'm wandering around through some old tunnel system (can't remember whether I'm sneaking into some place or escaping from something) and I come across this huge, broken-down sanctuary-type place that also looks like it used to be the bottom of a gigantic swimming pool. I reach out to touch all sorts of things, but they all feel like paper, which makes me realize I'm in a dream.

I figure this would be a good time to try to find my dream guide, so I say "When I turn around, there will be a door behind me". I turn around, and there's a door, but it's all blurry and translucent and unstable, so I touch it. (It feels like paper.) Once I've gotten the door fixed, I say "When I open this door, my dream guide will be there."

I open the door, and there's nothing there, but when I turn around, there's a great big cartoony pink elephant dancing on top of the altar. Around this point, I lose concentration. The elephant turns into a hippo and back occasionally, and then it disappears.

I don't remember much of this one, since I was forced to get up early this morning.

I think it started out with me reading some rather weird stories online - they were supposed to be fanfiction but they didn't really seem like it. The stories involved an Aladdin-esque desert setting. The protagonists were a couple of rogues, one of whom happened to be named Jack Ryan. The antagonist, though only given a passing mention in the story and never appearing himself, happened to be called (wait for it...) Andrew Ryan.

The plot played out something like a Boys' Love manga, with the rogues having known each other from a long time ago, but one left to pursue something and the other thought he had left because of a quarrel between them. So to prove his friendship/love/whatever, one of them runs straight up a stone wall and chisels a riddle into it:

"There is a treasure in the East
I have a stone and I have an eye
The stone has an eye and the eye has a stone
[something something something] alone."

At which point, the field of vision pans out. I'm in a fancy Italian restaurant, standing below a television. The dream had apparently all been a movie. They cut to a commercial break. The product being advertised is some sort of edible hair removal product, and the hosts discuss the riddle.

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Well, I know where my subconscious got the names and the slash fanfiction-y air, but I don't know where the desert factors into all of this. I don't think I've played or read anything desert-y recently... (Quite the opposite, I've been playing a game set entirely underwater!)

How very weird.

1. I was in a cafeteria that served amazing food. I ordered a chocolate lava cake with some sort of mysterious deep bluish-purple fruit on top. I also ordered a small glass of milk, at which point the server got into a lengthy discussion about lactose intolerance.

Somebody in the cafeteria was handing out slips of paper with prizes on them - $100, $50, $25, et cetera. Almost everybody got a slip with some monetary value. What did I get? A coupon for 5% off some sort of medication for an eye disease I don't have.

Suffice to say, I was angry, so I went for a walk through the mall. There was a display with these giant animatronic housecats that were, for the most part, free in ther actions (rather than being controlled from a booth or programmed to repeat the same actions over and over again). So... things... happened that you wouldn't expect to see happen involving two giant robotic cats in a public shopping mall.

1. Something about trying to get help from a unicorn who only helps people if they can recite information about Andrew Ryan from BioShock. If they get a fact wrong, it is assumed that the unicorn kills them.

2. Something about watching my older brother pour ungodly amounts of Sriracha chili sauce (the kind in the bottle with the rooster on it) over a tupperware full of ramen noodles. I could practically taste it just watching him eat. It was awful!

1. I got sent to prison for jaywalking... and prison was just like college.

2. Just doing some plain old LiveJournal roleplays.

1. Something about a Clavinova and a bunch of dresses that were too small for me.

2. Also, something about being at school and realizing I had rabbit ears, so I had to go home (as one would with a cold or the flu) because the school has a rule about kemonomimi being dangerous when they're visible (even if they aren't).

1. Being forced to find my way around my old school while blindfolded. Except that I could sorta peek out under the edge of the blindfold. Then there was a caterpillar that turned into a centipede and started crawling up my leg, so I tried to kick it off and ended up smushing it.

2. Someone reciting "Goodnight, Moon"

3. Chocolate-covered pretzels

4. The former president turned completely eeeeeeevil and forced all the kids in my city to attend a seminar held in the gym of my old school wherein he asked a bunch of questions where the "correct" answer was always the answer I disagree with.

The kids split up into two groups - one group that agreed with Mr.-Freaky-Evil-Former-President, and one group planning on rebelling. I was the leader of the rebels. Instead of a pep-talk, though, I played my pennywhistle.

This led to a bunch of gimmicky boss-fights that involved a lot of throwing things like dodgeballs and erasers and running and dodging charge-attacks that were a bit like the ones spliced-up Fontaine uses at the end of BioShock.

5. And speaking of BioShock, the last dream involved breaking into some random house. The security alarms went off, and there was a bot shutdown panel nearby -- right across from the security camera. So in order to get past it, I had to hide behind a pillow and shoot at the camera.

I made it to a closet and started searching through the pockets of all the coats. I found a couple of useful items and a lot of not-so-useful items... and suddenly realized Andrew Ryan was right behind me. Even though he kinda wasn't supposed to be alive at that point.

But before anything else could happen, I was awakened by the sound of construction going on right outside my dorm window.

1. I was being forced to plan somebody's wedding, because they couldn't afford to do the planning themselves. All "planning" involved was painting a picture of a flower, for some reason.

2. Somebody gave me a Sander Cohen doll made out of pasta that was supposed to come alive at midnight.

3. A Nostalgia Critic-esque run down of the 11 worst fandoms for which there is slash fiction.

Well, let's see if we can't sort out the broken pieces of last night's dreams...

1. Talking to a Pikachu. The subtitles kept flickering between English, Japanese, and "pika-pikaaaa~!"

2. My best friend realizes I was in love with her... in the style of a scene that could have been straight out of a musical. Complete with a duet (the last line of which went unfinished because I had to wake up to retrieve my ID card from the tech support office.)

3. In speech class, I have to make up a speech about a conspiracy involving candy. Afterward, out in the hall, there's a buffet with a ton of popcorn, including kernels the size of baseballs.

4. I'm a lion in a gigantic birds' nest that resembled my old loft/bunk-bed. I had just destroyed a clutch of eggs and was getting attacked by huge black vultures. I fight off the vultures, and they turn into torn-up plushies. Everything then gets rolled up into a great big Katamari.

5. At some point after the Katamari incident, I'm wandering around Rapture, except that it's been turned into a children's museum and airport. (Don't ask me how there can be an airport in a city at the bottom of the sea, I don't wanna break my brain figuring it out.)

There's an announcement over the PA that the jukeboxes were going to start playing modern music, and I grumbled to myself, "Oh great... now we'll all be stuck in Rap-ture." Luckily, nothing ever happened.

I'm headed toward Ryan's office in Hephaestus, but I suddenly realize I need breakfast first, so I find a restaurant serving waffles dipped in chocolate and mousse.

...and then all the construction noise outside woke me up.

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WTF, dreams #2 and #5?

Something to do with sandwiches and bananas.

I must have been hungry when I went to sleep last night...

1. I'm in a grocery store, looking for braunschweiger.

2. I have a pet ferret who, apparently, knows how to read.

3. I'm in a convention center that looks like a cross between the dorms here at UNK and the Student Union over at UNL. I was there for a BioShock LARP event, except that the plasmids were all real. At some point, I was running really low on health, and I was out of EVE points, so I was looking around for a safe room. On my way there, I encountered two LARPers who had just showed up, and I asked them if they were here for the event. Then a security guard tased me for talking to them, even though I asked the same question he was about to ask.

After recovering from that, I went to a room where I met Lilly, a character from the Fission Mailed roleplay community on livejournal. There was a tray of crescent rolls that restored a small amount of health each, and I ended up eating the entire batch. Then I found a recovery point I could just walk through (in the style of lots of RPGs I've played) to get my health and EVE the rest of the way up.

4. I'm getting a haircut. I somehow black out during the process, and the next thing I know, I'm looking in the mirror to find that I have bangs and that they lopped everything (three years of growing!) back to neck-length.

5. Watching a robin build a nest.

I had wings, directly attached to my arms. They were roundish, like those of a crow, and the feathers were mottled grey-and-white. Outside, there were heavy winds and there was deep snow all around. I kept trying to fly, but I never got off the ground, except for once when I got caught by a big gust of wind and blown straight into a snowbank.

It was depressing.

1. My best friend and I were stranded in the middle of the ocean. Suddenly, there were cruise ships and fences all around us, and we're informed this is a top-secret, off-limits military area. We get separated. They let me go, but I can't find my friend.

2. I'm in a library, and there's a flashy thing in a potted plant. I suspect it's a bomb, so I order everyone in the library to evacuate.

3. I'm in a bookstore, looking for some interesting new manga to read. "Hare Hare Yukai" from The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi starts playing over the radio, and I proceed to do the dance.

1. I was late to an ice-cream party. There were toppings and cones sitting out all over the counter, but when I went to scoop myself some ice cream, there wasn't any left.

The toppings were the sauces you'd find at a Mongolian Grill-type restaurant... sesame oil, cooking wine, lemon juice, curry sauce... -_-'

So then someone filled the bathtub with cooking wine and lemon juice, probably for a marinade.

2. I was at a hotel, in the parking lot, practicing "Kiss Me Goodbye" from Final Fantasy XII. So then I went to my hotel room and tried to find the instrumental version on YouTube so I could sing karaoke... but I couldn't find one.

There was a spider in my bathroom. A tiny one, but still a spider. My parents shut me in the bathroom and told me I could only come out once I had dealt with it.

So I'm watching this spider, and when it picks up a bug bigger than it is in its jaws, I try to stomp it, but it keeps dodging my shoe. And then it runs into the shower, so I turn on the water to try and drown it.

I eventually get rid of the arachnid, but a couple seconds later, I realize it's bitten my hand and the bite mark is swelling. I try to show my mom, but she doesn't believe me until I make her realize there are two fang-holes there.

My hand is getting numb.

For some reason, I'm wearing a bathrobe but I have shoes on, and we all pile into the car in order to drive to the hospital, which is in the same building as an old school.

Looking out the windows, everything is in gorgeous, vivid colors of autumn, and I think to myself: "I never really noticed how beautiful the world is."

And then I start to doze off...

...at which point I wake up in real life.

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I hatehatehatehatehatehatehate dreams with spiders in them. *shudder* My dreamcatcher must not be doing its job of preventing nightmares.

1. There's a room at my university where it's like a multicultural festival all the time, and if you know where to look, you can find restaurants hiding behind the curtains. There's one that claims to have the best dumplings ever, but when I go in, all they've got are day-old donuts.

2. I'm staying over at some random person's house with a bunch of other random people who are supposedly my friends of some sort or another.

We all pile into a car and go to this Starbucks that was also another really big house. I have some difficulty purchasing my coffee, but once I have it I decide to go out onto the patio to drink it. Suddenly, it starts raining. I figure, no problem, since I'm under a balcony and the temperature's otherwise nice. Then the wind really starts blowing... and the rain turns into snow. So I go back inside.

Then we go to a Wal-Mart, and suddenly everyone's trying to kill us. I hide next to a gumball dispenser machine with one of my friends who's trying to teach me how to turn myself multicolored in order to hide better.

By the time the bad guys have left, two of my friends have gotten themselves killed. We go back to the house.

3. I'm living in a house with some younger girls, and we're all servants for this one guy whose have two main points: No toys and no writing. But one of the girls has a secret cache of plushies and pens and paper buried in a deep hole under a sofa, and she shows me this plush mouse puppet on a string that she can make act like a real mouse.

I can't remember much other than alpacas. Somebody tried to convince me alpacas were much more reliable than horses, so I wound up riding an alpaca into headquarters that kept switching between Bandai and Studio GAINAX.