tblanco's Meditation Journal

**tblanco** · 05-16-2011 09:53 PM

Howdy,
First of all, thanks for taking the time to do this. I appreciate it.

I've been kind of half assed interested in all kinds of meditation since I was about 12 years old. I've never really had the dedication to stick to any of it but i've played in many different kinds of traditions, a little zen, a little TM, a little etc. Lately i've been playing with the Hemi-Sync Guided meditation series and it's been pretty fun.

I want to lucid dream regularly. I keep a journal pretty steadily since march. in that time i've had about 10 Lucid dreams but nothing for the past two weeks. I think i'm a little bit too much in my own head. Reading KingYoshi's ADA manual and a few others, it seems like meditation helps to bring focus and confidince and that would help me.

So i'm looking forward to this and hope that it helps.

**A_Citrus** · 05-17-2011 12:12 AM

Thanks for posting in your workbook thread!

Meditation certainly is good for ADA as it builds up your concentration and awareness. Since meditation relaxes the body and the mind, it may bring stability and confidence into your life.

Later in the class, I'll be encouraging students to start building up a meditation schedule. While this helps, you must have the dedication to stick to it. If you do stick to it, the dedication will come from the benefits you receive from meditation.

ShockWave.

**tblanco** · 05-17-2011 03:03 AM

Thanks,
that's going to be the sticking point with me, but i can do anything i put my mind to.

**tblanco** · 05-25-2011 05:38 PM

Meditation Journal 1.
wednesday 5-25-11
I sat down at 11:14am
I closed my eyes at 11:15
I opened my eyes at 11:33
Twice my nose itched, I scratched it.
At one point i wondered what would happen if you sauteed strawberries.
I had a memory of the first time i meditated, at the age of 13 in my parents kitchen, sitting in my father's bank of england chair.
i could hear the running water of my cats' drinking fountain.
the air conditioner kicked on.
at times i was imagining how i was going to write about this meditation.
anytime i thought, i would push it away
sometimes i was counting
then i would stop
I could hear my cats fighting for a second
i could see the lime green circle with a purple ring around it
when i opened my eyes it was 11:33 and i was very calm, almost sedated.
then i came over here to write about it.

**A_Citrus** · 05-25-2011 11:01 PM

You did great on your first try. In your next attempt, you should try not to focus on the thoughts when they come into your head. Dismiss them and allow them to go into your mind and straight out without dwelling on them (dwelling is a great word

).

ShockWave.

**tblanco** · 05-26-2011 02:41 PM

Meditation Journal 2
Eyes Closed 8:13
Eyes Open 8:35
When i closed my eyes i had the lee ann rhimes song "how do i live" stuck in my head
i did some counting of breaths up to 20
had thoughts but like you say i dismissed them when they came
I thought about the cosmic shells
there was this nightmare i had last night where i was being betrayed by an acquaintance
I thought about this study i read about that talks about the damage to the brain betrayal causes
I let that go on for a second and realized that one of my goals for lucid dreaming is to heal the damage done to me by a recent betrayal
I went quiet
My head bobbed back for a second but i caught myself.
and i sat breathing until i had to stop.
i opened my eyes and felt a little better than before i closed them.

**A_Citrus** · 05-26-2011 04:23 PM

That's good, it sounds like you're getting better at dismissing the thoughts. To coin a phrase, "practice makes perfect"!

ShockWave.

**tblanco** · 05-28-2011 05:42 PM

JOurnal 3
5-28-11
eyes closed 11:22
eyes open 11:38
I counted breaths backwards from 100
big slow diaphram deep breaths
i got to 65 before i opened my eyes
i thought about that scene in the new bad news bears movie where billy bob thorton kept pegging those kids with baseballs
i could hear the dishwasher, the sound was soothing
my phone rang but i let it go
you really do come out of this a little bit more chill than before.
just a tiny bit more serene and aware of what's around you.
now i'm going to play some dragon age.

**A_Citrus** · 05-29-2011 02:02 PM

Try to keep up the meditation until you begin to feel as if you are aware of things around you, without focusing on them. This will improve your concentration and it'll also help you get deeper into the meditation

.

ShockWave.

**tblanco** · 06-14-2011 06:46 PM

Lost a couple of these journals too. Sadness. Ah Well.
I did a void meditation today
Counted breaths till i got to 50, then on every exhale i though "shh" to quiet any thoughts i had going around. There were lots of thoughts i would get caught up in for moments but then i'd let them go and say SHH