I'm new, so bear with me.

This is what I dreamed in my morning dream before waking.

I dreamed that I was getting married to a man I don't know in my real life. We were happy, no concerns. Things were planned accordingly. It was to a small wedding at my parent's house. (that's a recurring theme, my parent's house.)

On the day of the wedding my fiance is .. I suppose he's off getting things we need, or taking care of business. He may have been renting a truck for our move.

I'm arriving at the house with family and there's a funeral going on in the front yard. It's a short service. I'm not even sure anything was said. Key things that I remember are: the funeral was for a male friend, and my aunt (whom I don't have a very good relationship with) was also dead, and before dying (she was told she only had a few days, very sudden) made a memorial gift for this man for me. It was when I saw the memorial (I think it was a painted stone or brick) I cried. I also watched the casket go into the ground and was upset I either didn't arrive sooner or there wasn't time for me to see him and say goodbye.

Next sequence we're inside the house in the main room. It's like a pre-reception. Snacks and some drinking. I don't think I drank anything. Most of the guests are my dad's friends from back in the day. I don't recognize many people. My sister, my father and a man my aunt dated way back in the day that I had had a crush on. Background: I'm 41 so we're talking probably 30 years ago. They were probably around 16-18 when I had the "crush". My mother was not there. Yes, I have a strained relationship with my mother, a decent relationship with my younger sister and an awkward relationship with my father.

There are sparks between me and this guy. Guarded sparks. I remember feeling the "crush" feeling, remembering the past and wanting to talk with him a bit. We did some. The conversations were very light-hearted and short and we tended to move away from each other because well, it was my wedding day and I was conflicted. He seemed to feel the same way.

Soon I realized I needed to get ready! I wasn't ready, yet! I wasn't overly panicked as this was to be a fairly laid back ceremony in the side yard. I went to the back bedroom that used to be mine but is now my sister's and started going over a check list. Most things were taken care of, except for the groom arriving with the truck. A white moving truck. A brief moment of putting make up on and fixing hair. I don't remember putting on the dress, but eventually it was on. There was of course the moment of "I don't know what to wear!" but it was short-lived.

For some reason the pre-reception moved into the back bedroom. There wasn't much room. The bed was on one side and most people sat there. My father was stressing about the things he had to do the next day, including getting the white truck back on time. On the other side of the room was a dresser with things on it, presents, refreshments, etc. There was a box with things as well. All presents were wrapped in same paper and small. My father asked where the alcohol was and I pulled it out. He was stressing about it some. I pulled out of one of the boxes a huge bottle of liqueur. It was supposed to be something I took with me but I figured the groom and I would be more later. I still did not drink anything. (background: my father is a recovering alcoholic and I'm an alcoholic that still drinks.)

I sat on the floor between the bed and dresser. The crush was sitting on the bed near me. I looked out the window and there was a flood, much like a moat surrounding the house. Brown muddy water. No one seemed stressed about this. I was not stressed by it except maybe wondering how we'd get around it to get to the wedding. There was a red-headed boy outside, his hair was a little long. He was about 14. He looked up and smiled. I smiled back. I look out again and there is a dog, I believe a golden retriever, swimming and playing in the flood water. Still, no stress. I remember counting age wise when he'd be "legal", that I'd be 22 when he turned 18. That's when I realized I was 18 in the dream.

I go back to where I was sitting and I talk with the crush, his name is Eric now that I recall, and I tell him I remember him having this purple pouch that he carried small items in, and that I had thought it was cool when I was younger. (So dream time, this would have been only 7 years prior.) He said he still had it and I was surprised. He said he'd give it to me as a gift. Implying it was packed away and that he'd bring it to me at a future date. I was happy and surprised. I again realize I'm supposed to be getting married and flirting is not cool, when he leans over and whispers something. The only thing I catch is "miss". I know my face flushed and I asked him to repeat it, he said "I missed you." My heart was racing, conflicting emotions. I almost wanted to leave the room because I was starting to panic about all the implications. Realizing I was probably going to cheat after marriage. A part of me wanted to call off the wedding because at that point I couldn't even remember what the groom looked like and he still wasn't there. And there I was plotting 4 years into the future with the red-headed boy and having a lot of emotional feelings for my crush.

Then my alarm went off. I'd say most of the dream was slightly lucid, especially since there was some slight waking going on during it and I did was this crush to like me back.

I hope this isn't too long. It's the first dream in a long time that I've remembered so much of and and so much symbolism in it. I'll be starting a dream journal shortly, I just wanted to get this out there. I woke up slightly anxious about it.

Thank you for reading / responding!

Jen