Having trouble relaxing. Any tips?

[Optics233]

Hey everyone, I'm new to lucid dreaming but I'd really love to learn to do it. I've been working on my dream recall, etc... but the most consistent problem I've had is with trying to relax. If I clear my mind of all thoughts as I'm trying to get to sleep, or if I focus on telling myself "I'm going to lucid dream tonight" (as in a Mild I guess) I become instantly very aware of my breathing, and I become so conscious of my breathing that I almost start holding my breath and feel like I'm suffocating. I know it sounds strange, but I'm just not able to calm myself down. The only way I can seem to get to sleep is if I say 'screw lucid dreaming' and allow myself to think about whatever thoughts pop into my head until I eventually lose track and drift to sleep, but that's not very helpful for lucid dreaming now is it? Any tips would be really helpful. It seems like the more I think about *not* thinking, the harder it becomes to just let everything go. Thanks so much in advance!

[hashmash89]

Try to just let your breath be natural, don't try to control it just be aware of it. Our breath has its own rhythm so it will naturally flow without your effort. As for your mantra, kind of say it in the back of your mind so that it does not keep you awake. You might even just try meditating on the mantra for a while before bed and then going to sleep the way you normally would. This way you could let your mind wander allowing you to sleep. It may not be as effective as if your mantra was your last thought but it could still help. Practice being aware of your breath though and like I said just let it be natural. If you try to control it, it could do the opposite of relax you. The breath is an amazing tool for relaxation so I definitely suggest you get more comfortable with it. I would also suggest you practice clearing your mind throughout the day so that it's not so difficult before sleep. MILD isn't the only way to LD though, if focusing so much is keeping you awake you can try DILD instead. Then you can go to sleep without even thinking about LDing because you will be relying on your awareness to induce lucidity. Heres an awesome DILD guide http://www.dreamviews.com/f12/all-da...3/#post1628862 Hope this helps, welcome to dreamviews btw