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[gloria96]

Hi. I'm new here. I've had recurring nightmares about being raped for years. I'm not sure when they started but I think I was about 13 (I'm 19 now). They look and feel very real. I don't remember all the dreams but I'll see if I can describe a few of them. Dream 1: I'm laying on my bed. It's completely dark. It looked like there were no windows or anything. Suddenly, I can feel someone holding me down. He started touching my leg but I can't remember if he raped me or not. I remember waking up breathing heavily and shaking. My heart was pounding so fast and I was too afraid to go back to sleep. Dream 2: I'm in my room sitting on my bed. No ones home except me and my dad. He comes in and tells me to "shhhh". He then proceeds to lay me down, gets on top of me and rapes me. While he's raping me, my mom gets home. He gets dressed and tells me not to say anything. I run out of the room and immediately tell my mom...and then I wake up. Dream 3: My family and I are out (forgot where we were at) but I go to the restroom and for some reason, I'm the only one in there. My dad walks in and grabs me, holds me down on the floor and rapes me. I woke up while it was still happening. Most of my dreams get to the point pretty quick but they last a while and they feel VERY real. And all of them, except the 1st one, involve my dad. I should mention that when I was in Middle School, I had a friend who had the same bus stop. Well one day when we got off, he grabbed my waist. I pushed his hands away but he'd pull me back and do it again. I can't remember if he put his hand lower or tried to. But I blocked that memory from my mind that I forgot it happened and so we remained friends. In March, we went for a walk at about 9:30ish. When we got to the park we would pull me and touch my waist multiple times. I didn't say "stop" b/c I thought he would get the hint that I wasn't interested. He kept doing it so I suggested we sit and talk and maybe that would get him to stop. But he would actually lean in and try to kiss me so I got up and continued to walk. As we were leaving, he pulled me by my wrist against his body, and wouldn't stop touching me. I told him to let me go and to stop but he wouldn't. I had to yank myself out. Thankfully, he took me home without doing anything else. I was depressed for about a month, but got over it. Looking back I think I'm just blocking it out like I did when I was 13. I'm always paranoid. I often think "what if he's stalking me? What if he kidnaps me?" Etc. and I realized I have serious trust issues. There's another guy that likes me who I've known since middle school too. We stopped talking when we got to HS but recently started talking again. Well about a month ago, he asked if I wanted to role play. I asked him what he meant, and he said if I wanted to role play a rape scene. Idk who would ask that, but I do not trust AT ALL! And not a day goes by that he doesn't ask me, if I want to hang out but I always make excuses so I won't have to. Sorry, this is so long but I hope with the info I have provided, someone can help figure out why I keep having these nightmares.

[Darkrobin]

Dreams comes from memories or stuff that has happened before. Most likely what you have experienced and that you keep remembering them will always pop up in your dream. I've had a bad past to, and i noticed they keep coming back on me in the dreams. Most stuff that HAS happened to you, will most likely happen in a dream. Sorry that you had so many problems, hope everything will be ok

[tasinios]

Seems to me that you are hanging around with pretty creepy people...Anyways i agree with Darkrobin but i am going to add that dreams are sometimes related to your thoughts and concerns.What i mean by that is that if you think of something extensively throughout the day it is going to transfer to your dreams.For me it happens the same day most of the times.So if those nightmares concern you and you think of them all the time they will just keep coming back.Even if you just think about sex it may cause you to have those nightmares.

[Rothgar]

You need to stay away from that guy. He sounds like a stalker.

[Dreamwalkwr]

Welcome

[Dreamwalkwr]

Sorry to hear all the bad dreams. I'd be locking doors behind me though with dreams like that. Hope you can learn how to control them so they don't disturb you so much, I'm pretty sure they aren't helping with your trust issues.