Ok, hey guys... I've been asking myself for a while now whether I should join or not... hehe... ok... I'm not exactly new to lucid dreaming I've had one when I was like 8.

It was pretty fun. I had woken up... and all of the sudden I apparently fell asleep... then somehow... in the dream I had realized I was asleep... but I wanted to be awake... so I kept telling myself "Wake Up! Wake Up!" and then I woke up in the bed only to realize I was in another dream... I was so frustrated... lol... I went through like 8 dreams before I actually woke up... In the first part... my sister(my favorite relative) was leaving... I remember crying lol, then I went on to the next part... which I can't remember... but then I remeber waking up in some icy cold place, then a couple of other dreams until I finally reached the last one... where I was on the couch trying to wake up... and all of the sudden I just walk to the TV turn it on... and apparently batman's on (lol) and bats come out of the TV and I wake up finally for real. When I woke up, I told my self "Finally!" lol.

Then I had another one like 2 years ago... or was it last year... I can't remember... lol I could just verbally control the dream... I had somehow figured out how to control it... and then I said... "If this is a dream... I can control it" then I started relating the dream to the book thinking "Since this is my dream, this would be like a book I would be writing" so I started saying "And then, " and then I just put what I wanted to happen like "And then a cake appeared in front of me" and stuff like that.

Lol. Then I found this site last year... somehow... I can't remember... maybe it was through wikipedia. I read it and I found it quite good... I had a couple of lucid dreams a couple of days later... I gained like an ice power... even though something didn't feel right... I didn't feel like I had full control of the dream... oh well... lol... I've had lucid dreams but can't control when I have them... and didn't focus on it that time too much. I guess it's when I really wanted something that I'm at my best like when I was 8 I wanted to wake up so I felt like I controlled the dream well even though I was failing... and in the other dream... I wanted something... lol... can't remember though... but that's what made me feel that I was controlling my dream... because I was pushing myself. That other one was pretty much just testing the stuff I read here... but I didn't push myself... anyhow... I was thinking about joining back then... but didn't.

Now today I've remembered about lucid dreams... and want to give it another shot. I have really good dream recall I suppose... especially with nightmares... they just stick to my head like glue... anyhow yeah... that's pretty much it... I'm 14 now btw... I still remember dreams from long ago like when I was six I was choked by a shadow(which my sister turned into) and before that I saw a bloody person behind the window on the rainy day right when the lightning flashed. Man... I've died so many times... lol... I guess... the fact about dying and nightmares freak me out so much that they stick to my head. Sometimes I just feel like they mean something... I've had several nightmares about The Ring movie... lol... but yeah... nightmares feel so real... and my brain just keeps making me think that they mean something... like that time when I was trying to get to my teachers classroom but couldn't reach it... and encountered things like demons... and a priest who loved his girl so much that he kept the corpse underneath his bed... it freaked me out so much... luckly I managed to reach the end and felt a burst of Positive Energy that was a great relief... lol... yeah I have crazy dreams... *sigh* and one of the reasons I want to lucid dream is to test something out. If something is troubling you... you have a nightmare... and that's just a way of the subconciousness telling you.

Now Lucid Dreaming is a really great way to defeat the dream... but what about knowing why your having the nightmare. I want to just enter the dream... summon the monster or something, which probably won't work, or wait until it appears if it is a recurring nightmare, and then just ask it, "Why are you here?" or something like that... it would be like talking to your subconciousness, and getting an answer as to why your having a nightmare. A reason why I feel it my work... is because I've had a couple of dreams somewhat likethat... not LD though. It was a pretty weird dream... I mainly focused at the end...we were painting the house... and I was having a flashback while painting. In there... I imagined my mom... with a dog... and she was taking care of it and stuff... and then she worried about it... and stuff... and I can't remember the exact thing that happened... I think she told the dog something like "You have a family now" or something like that... and that's when in my imagination I said "I never had a family!" and then woke up.

Wondered what was the meaning of that... thing is... I feel that there are somethings about me that I feel that I need to figure out... like I know that that feeling in the dream was a feeling of feeling left out in the family... but even though... I felt like that in the dream... and I suppose I feel like that in real life... in real life I als have the exact opposite of that feeling and that pretty much confuses me and I feel that Lucid Dreaming might be a way. So that's one of the reasons I'm into lucid dreaming. Anyhow that's why I feel that asking the monster/shadow/whatever why they're there... or what they are... or something and getting answers... possible answers anyways... anyhow... yeah... pretty long introduction... lol

EDIT:
wow... longer than I expected O.O