I've been reluctant to post this and haven't updated my Dream Journal here on site because I've been wanting to try to figure this out for myself, but currently I've been having a bad string of Nightmares. Every night I will shoot awake at around 4:00-4:30, dripping with sweat.

My dream recall has gotten pretty good I guess considering I'm remembering a Nightmare every night now.

This kinda started outta the blue, I'd have a normally half-decent recall. It had been recently getting better slowly, but then one night I remembered a dream, the first Nightmare, in more detail than I've ever remembered a dream.

This has been going on for a little over a week I guess. I finally decided to post because of the latest Nightmare.

They all involved the same thing, someone dying. I made a post in the Help forum a while ago about where I am in life. I hadn't expanded on that, but long story short I have few people I really care about, few people I would consider real friends. The few people I do consider friends, I care for very, very deeply. These are the people I truly respect. There are only 4, though I've had one nightmare involving a 5th, who I've only just met however. So that was a shocker to me, but thats not the point.

Each Nightmare's death involves the persondying extremely violently. The dreams are very graphic, very bloody and very gory, and they're always crying for help and in extreme pain. It has been coming to the point where I just don't want to go to sleep at night.

In one instance I actually was able to try and help one of them, but it ended in failure.

The last Nightmare, wasn't actually entirely a Nightmare. It was very odd to say at the least.

I was whipping through what seemed like space at an extreme speed. There were glowing shapes all around me. Some were 2D, some 3D, some morphing between the two. They were all different colours, and seemed to be made of light, and were just floating in what seemed like empty space.

I was whipping through this space in what seemed like a tunnel made of dull glowing light, but I could see outside this tunnel, ala the shapes.

But things started to change, to take actual shape. An actual scene began to form around me. Grass, Trees, a blue sky, buildings and animals (though none like I'd ever seen before) started to form. When it all came together I was floating our front of a Cathedral or Church. Just floating there. I wasn't right in front of it, it was a slight distance away. I floated there looking at it, and it blasted apart into little cubes and then flew back together around me, putting me inside.

I looked around this church, amazed. Then I waved my hand around and watched as it left a path, like an after image. I did this for a bit until I heard a Priest's voice. It was so soothing, I loved hearing it. I closed my eyes and relaxed. I could still see with my eyes closed though. Not entirely, but I could see the outlines of people, of the priest, of the windows of the church. All I saw was blackness and blue streaks of light, of the outlines of people and things in this building.

But when I opened my eyes again, thats when things started to freak me out. The Priest help up a cross. A rather large cross, seemed to be made of gold. Things started slowly here. Voices started to become more dull, and sounded more as if they were in slow motion. I started to question my beliefs and myself. I started to ask myself whether I was "right" in being an Atheist. I asked myself left, right and center about my own beliefs. I got so confused and it came to the point where I just couldn't think and I just didn't know or understand. I started to panic.

I looked back up towards the priest holding the cross. When I did, the waslls of the Cathedral went black, the windows went blood red. The people in the church benches all turned to look at me, their faces seemed to be melting and they screamed as they vaporized into ash. The chandeliers, the benches, the podium all turned to bone.

Then the Jesus on the cross began to move. Watching what looked like metal move like that was very odd to see. His face showed him in pain, suffering. He was speaking what I understood to be latin, and it sounded backwards. I listened in fear as he spoke, and watched as he struggled.

Then I looked a little further down again, to where the Priest holding the cross was standing. No longer a Priest, a what seemed like a Fallen Angel was standing there. The cross dropped to the ground behind him as it stood there. It stood with a pale face. Its robes were ripped and tattered, blood covered and with burn marks. The the wings also torn and tattered, feathers damaged and ugly. The angel was crying tears of blood. Along with its eyes glowing vibrantly with hot white light, hell they we're just pure white light.

Then it then tilted its head and moved it toward me and screamed, the most dreadful scream I've ever heard. Like a screech of a banshee or something, with that same white light coming from its mouth.

I felt everything rush around me, and heard a booming voice. Well... I didn't actually "hear" it, but I knew it to be there. It was also speaking backwards latin, in anger.

As I heard this voice, along with the screech of this angel, I covered my ears and shut my eyes tight. It was so unbearable. There was a slight second long, if even that, pause in the screeching where I opened my eyes only to see the angel screech louder and as the white light took its whole face, and soon body. And it extended more throughout this cursed building, which then flew apart like it did at the beginning of the dream.

There was no outside this time though, it was just pitch and pure black in all directions.

Just as the light from this creature was about to reach me, I went flying back. In that moment, every Nightmare I'd had about my friends dying flashed before my eyes rapidly. It was like experiencing each dream over again in the span of less than a second.

As I flew back at extreme speed into this blackness, I watched as the only thing not black, this light from the angel just got smaller and smaller the further I got.

Finally, I stopped. I slowed down and fell. After being in freefall for a short bit, I slowed to the point were I was floating and was set down gently on something solid. Though there was still black in all directions.

In the end I looked up and noticed a very, very subtle blue. Down was a very, very subtle green. Suddenly, all the fear washed away and I felt extremely happy. I smiled, I fell back and laughed. Suddenly the scene returned, a bright blue sky and green grass. A beautiful, beautiful scene.

I closed my eyes once again, and finally awoke.