Xanous' Dream Journal

#242 - DILD - 03:04 AM

I am working in some strange factory I think with dirt floors and large metal cylinders. I see several people I know from my past but one guy stands out. Aaron. He is walking behind me and I keep looking back trying to place him. I feel something is off.

I suddenly have a Fa in some bed in the middle of the factory. I wish that I had talked to Aaron now that I realize it was a dream. I'm glad I had one so vivid but wish I had got lucid. I also realize that I passed out too fast before I could do an induction. I feel a little bummed my coffee didn't do much for me. I wonder what went wrong. I remember that I am trying to make a habit of doing a nose plug every time I wake up. I partly blow through. I find this odd but I am so sure I am awake. I try to rationalize why I would blow through at all. I breath out my nose normal and notice that the feeling is the same. I think maybe since I've been sick my nose is a little clogged. But that doesn't quite add up either so I try again. This time my breath stops.

I have another FA and this time I am at home in my own bed. I can't believe my nose plug RC failed but I decide I better do it again out of good practice. I partly blow through again. OK now I know something is up. This time I focus more intently on it. With more deliberation, I feel my hand squeeze hard on my nose but the feel is also a little numb. There's my first clue. Now, this time I blow through cleanly. Ha! I am dreaming still!

I have a hard time getting out of bed and it feels like the start of an OBE. I am actually in the void but I don't realize it yet. I open eyes but it feels like my physical eyes. Though all I see is total blackness I worry that I will wake myself up. I close my eyes and focus on seeing through my eyelids. Some shadows and patterns begin to take shape. I rub hands for stability and see them clearly in light against black void. I get up and start running into the void hoping a scene will form. I begin surging forward at an incredible rate and have an intense feeling of G-forces. It takes my breath away and I gasp loudly. The feeling surges through my whole body and I have to ground myself and focus before it gets too uncomfortable. Everything slows down and I continue forward. Now, I unintentionally level out horizontally and begin flying. I start surging forward like before and repeat the whole breathless gasping episode again. After I calm down again, I feel myself fall to my back. I don't want to end up in bed again so I try harder to focus on a scene.

Suddenly I am standing in my darkened house. I am in the living-room and move to a light switch. There are creepy shadows of some humanoid entities in my way. I feel fear so I curse at them and push through anyway. I am actually standing in the living-room/kitchen threshold where there are two light switches on both sides of the wall.

I flip light switches but only the light in my son's room on the other side of the living room comes on. I say out loud, "I want some fucking light in here right now." I Flip the switches on and off but it only effects my son's room. I flip them off again as I say, "Now!" Flip them on, "In hear right now". Something like fingers tickles my arm from the darkness in the kitchen. I turn and address the the shadows masking my fear with anger, "You mother fucking bitches better go away! I swear to God I'll fuck you up!" It stops.

I turn my attention back to the lights. I try flipping the switch switch one more time and again only my sons room lights up. Suddenly, I realize its not all that bad. There is at least some light coming on and it is actually realistically flooding into the living room enough to see some detail. I decide the dream must want me there so I go. I begin to feel exhilarated and my heart rate picks up. The excitement of what I might find has me bursting at the seems. I feel like I can do anything my heart desires though I know my time is short. I hurry across the living remembering not to be too excited.

There is a kind faced, smiling woman in the room. I recognize that she looks like a woman from work but also very different too. She is much taller and I feel like a child next to her. The top of my head probably comes only waist high. She is wearing a pink frilly dress like something from the Victorian era. I move close and take her hand, "Hi. Who are you?"

She doesn't look at me or respond to my question though I'm holding her large hand in both mine. She seems to only off handedly but surely acknowledge my presence. I hear my own voice respond to my question in my head, "KRISTY."

The thought doesn't feel like my own and I assume she's telepathic. I verbally ask her, "Will you take me with you?" I feel like I could use some help in this dream and feel excited about the idea of giving a DC control. They always surprise me and that's what I like in my lucids the most. Surprises.

I don't hear a voice in my head this time but receive a "knowing" that she will take me along. We start out the front door and It looks like more void out there. I look up at her again to hold on to some visual stability. This time my eyes do a strange rolling movement and my physical eye lids flit open.

I do a nose plug to confirm that I really am awake this time.

#180 - 7:07AM - DEILD/DILD - 3 of 3

The alarm clock went off at 7am. I let my wife be the one to hit the snooze because I wanted to go for a DEILD. I was a little disappointed that I missed so many opportunities to become lucid after the first two LDs. I didn't move a muscle or open my eyes and focused on the back of my neck. I got weak vibrations right away. I continued a little longer hoping that they would get more intense like usual. Another bad idea.

I found myself non lucid in a public restroom that looked a lot like a home bathroom. I take a leak in a normal toilet (not a urinal). A miniature version of Ms. Page (I'll leave the first name off to protect the innocent. ), an ex girl friend of mine that later became a good friend, is sitting on the back of the toilet with her boyfriend chatting away. I say something about privacy and go to a row of sinks to wash my hands. There is a soft soap pump bottle and when I squirt some out I knock over the bottle. The top was loose and liquid soap spills all over the counter. I notice several men on either side of me washing their hands. Embarrassed, I say out loud, "Ooops. Sorry, I'm still half asleep." I pause. Still... asleep. DING! The light comes on.

I realize I am dreaming and for fun, look into the mirror. I smile real big at my self and make funny faces. I'm really excited that I am lucid and it shows on my blurry face in the mirror. I leave the bathroom with no real task in mind and go exploring.

There's a slight memory gap but I was basically running around what looked like a shopping mall laughing manically and being overly hyper. I end up busting in some door that went into some office space in the back part of the mall. There are several women sitting at a conference desk. For some reason the song Hey Ladies by the Beastie Boys pops in my head. I confuse the lyrics a little and loudly sing, "HEY LADIES! WHERE'S ALL THE SINGLE LADIES IN THE HOUSE!?" My intentions were never sexual and judging by all the bored and disinterested stares that I got in reply, I think my subconscious knew it.
I say, "What? Really? Nobody?"

Then I remember that I saw Ms. Page in the bathroom and began to regret that we haven't talked in a long time in waking life. I see a corded phone on the conference desk and pick up the receiver to page her. At that moment I realize I have no idea how to page so I fake it. I dial 'star' 'eight', thought about it moment then, 'nine'. I hear a tone on the loud speaker and I speak, "Umm..." I hear my voice over the intercom and to my surprise it sounds very realistic. "(first name) Page please call.." Oh shit what extension? I look on the phone and see some random letters and numbers printed in white on black. I see '*16' and decide thats it. "... extension one six". I thought 'one six' was a little short so I add, "six six." Sure I'll add a few 6's. Why not?As soon as I hang the phone up it rings.
I answer. "Hello?"
I hear a very lively and smooth female voice reply, "Hey! What are you doing?
"Oh", I said. I'm surprised at how much it really sounds like her. "I just wanted to see you. You know... nothing weird. Just wanted to chat and see how things were going. Can you come here?"
She sounded happy about the idea. "Sure I'll see you in a minute." I hang up the phone and decide to walk out of the office into a more public area to keep things from getting awkward.

I find myself in a busy food court and take a seat on a bench looking around for her face in a sea of strangers. I feel the dream getting distorted and hazy so I get up and pace around. I still feel really amped up and decided the pacing was a good idea. My legs feel tense and energetic and what I really want to do now is go for a run but I force myself to calm down and wait. I'm curious if she will actually show up.

I come up behind one woman that I think might be her and quickly give her a friendly hug from behind but when she turns around it doesn't really look like her. I just go with it hoping she will change. I say, "Hi! It's good to see you again." The woman just glares at me. I notice now that she is a blond and my friend was never blond and now her face is all wrong. I say to her, "Oh sorry. I thought you were someone else."
She hatefully and sarcastically replies, "Uh yeah.. You think?" and storms off.
I shout after her, "WELL WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY ANYTHING?"

I search around some more and spot Ms. Page sitting on the bench that I was just at. I walk over and sit next to her. She is holding a toddler and I remember that she was pregnant the last time I talked to her in walking life. I study her face for a moment to make sure. It looks just like her but her face is a little shifty. I shrug that off as normal.
"Oh hi!" I said. "I forgot that you had another kid! What's her name?"
She starts talking excitedly but now the dream is fading. I take her left and and hold it in both of mine. I don't care anymore what she is saying and I begin to softly stroke the back of her hand for stability. It's not working and I shush her so I can concentrate.
Showing real concern she asks me, "What wrong?"
I say, "Oh nothing really. It's just that I'm waking up now and I don't want to." The scene fades to black.

I see another scene forming but force myself awake as I know my time must but almost up. The dream felt like it went on for a long time and I was afraid to forget.

The alarm goes of for the second time once I start to DJ in my phone.