Xanous' Dream Journal

Bike Fail

I am riding my mountain bike in the woods. I come to a point were I want to take a canoe with my wife. I try to get set up. I notice how big the bike is and how little the canoe is. I set the bike aside and try to just get the canoe in the water there is some strange guy in the water and his canoe.

I get the canoe set and notice the guy built a fire right next to my bike. It melted the cables off and the bike felt hot. I have no breaks or gearing now. I am so pissed. I tell the guy what he did and how he should pay me some money. Hes says, "what you want a loan." I say, "Oh yeah imagine that. Someone being responsible for what they do."

I get the bike to our camp site and show my wife. Now the bike is worse. The nut holding the tube fork is gone. I say, "This is just dead weight now." I get the idea to lock it up at the visitor center nearby and get it when we leave.

The Walking Dead

We were over ran by zombies and trying to find a safe place. A lot of people died. We make it to a church. We are inside it and there is a man and woman there. I am up on a stage and there were doors. I hear and see a zombie moaning and turning a doorknob. Open it to kill it but two cups fall out. One was blue and one was turquoise. I treat the cups like they are full of zombie viruses.

I notice some tomatoes pilled high in the corner. I go back to the people and I see Laurie and Hershel from The Walking Dead. I assume now that I am Rick. I sort of hint to Laurie about the tomatoes and how we made "Something" from them to create explosives. She gets it and lets me know we will use them later.

I am now on a 4-Wheeler in my state trooper uniform and hat. I worry that I will attract all the zombies back to our place but I am looking for something. The landscape looks like Texas in the summer. Dry open pasture land. I see a old run down sign that looks like something from a Fallout game. It says something about a resort.

Then I get a flash of memory about how I went there and knocked on the door wanting in so bad. But the people inside where cruel and evil. I barely escaped alive.

But no that's not what I want. I see a trashed out mobile home. The metal frame looks good. I want it. Then I see it hauled off by something.

Now I am standing in an open parking lot. I see three of those mobile home frames outfitted to be solid bug sort of caged looking. They are stacked and hanging from one another independently from a crane. We have attached bits of broken rope and rags of all colors so that it is easy to climb up them and be high up and away from any zombies. I climb up and wonder why it is so easy and why I don't get tired. Then I see a severed thumb with a silver ring hanging from a rope. I am shocked at first. I pause to examine it and then quickly forget about it.

Now we are all in a comfortable living quarter inside one of the mobile homes. It is fully furnished and complete with everything we need. We are entertaining the kids with some sort of projector video game.

I wake up.

Another Poop Dream
I am at my parents and we are getting ready to go to General Convention (a church thing). I am pissed off and don't want to go. I am sitting in a recliner and my wife is next me saying something. I am annoyed because I am trying to read the Bible but she is talking. I get hateful and tell her to leave if she wants to. That I won't beg. As I am saying this I see a bookmark that says "Preach it, Thomas". I think this must be my grandfathers who is now dead.

I go up stairs to the bathroom. I am still grumbling how I don't want to go. I need to poop so I sit on the toilet. Then I find myself suddenly on the floor in front of the open door. I start to go but I see my mom may a face like what are you doing and then she waves me away like go ahead. I stand up and think no I should be on the toilet.

Then I remember that I dream this a lot and I say, "Am I dreaming? Am I dreaming?" I say the words but I don't really ask the question. It is just like something I was supposed to say and had no meaning.

I sit down on the toilet and hear the poop plop in the water.

Alarm clock wakes me up.

1) some sort of quest. I am at work. I talk to Michelle and Joyce. Something about my daughters. I inspect a crimp termination.

2) I am in a bathroom stall. The toilet over flows when I flush. Shit water to my waist. My wife tries to help but I send her out.

# Why am I dreaming so much about shit and bad bathroom experiences? I vow to RC every time I go!

Aids: 1/8 tea peppermint oil WBTB
Methods: MILD - non lucid dream re-entry
Morning Supplements: 2 super B complex at lunch
Sleep Quality: Good

Abducted 4:44am
The first part is vague. I am in a public bathroom and two men in tan trench coats corner me. One looks like a supervisor from work and the other look like another guy at work.

The next thing I remember is I am in a type of concentration camp. The world is gray and lifeless. The sky is dark and over cast. The vegetation is dead and dying. I am with a group of people. Their clothes are worn and tattered and colorless. (black and or gray) I look and see an bird like a hawk or eagle carrying a vividly bright red ribbon. It drops it down by an old and worn out wooden outhouse.

I am told that this is all we are allowed to wipe with this red ribbon. It seems that it is an intentional insult that the only bright and colorful thing in the world is to be used to wipe with. I pick it up and wonder how this is supposed to work out. It looks awfully thin.

#Why am I obsessed with poop and bathrooms?

I hear a noise and see myself a several yards away. I am making a crazy face at myself and sounding like I am crazy or mentaly ill. I hear the noise from another direction and again it is a version of me going crazy. Then again from another direction. I look away and know that I must be hallucinating. I look away. For some reason I think that we are suffering form radiation poisoning.

I see something like a magical opening into a bright and colorful world. It looks like the inside of a Wal-Mart. A way out is there before us and no one takes it? I say "screw it" and run as fast as I can toward the opening. I wonder why no one is following me. Then I remember that for some reason we people leave they cannot survive. They are too used to the radiation and die without it. I tell myself, "I don't care if I die, one way or another I am getting the hell out of here!"

I run through Wal-Mart and outside into an open field. I don't feel any ill effects. In fact I feel great. I think maybe I was not there long enough and it is different for me. I look back and see the two men are almost upon me. I notice I have my cell phone still. They only let me have because it was useless where I was but now I can use it.

As I am running I try to send a text to my wife. I can get it to work and I can't see while running. Then I think to call her. I look in my contacts and they are all her contact and all look identical with her picture. I just pick the first one and hope it works. I think I will tell her to call the police and get me a lawyer because I want to prosecute these people and help the others. All the time I am doing this I am running around the two men and dodging their grasp. As I put the phone to my ear I wake up.

#I use MILD and fall into non lucid dream.
#The next part is very vague

Abducted Continued 5:30AM
I am now sitting at a bar with a drink with some people I know. Its like I was telling the story about how I was captured and got away. I tell them how I hope those men never find me. And the authorities never found out anything useful. The alarm clock wakes me up.

Aids:1/8 tea peppermint oil WBTB
Methods:MILD - Half assed
Morning Supplements:500mg L-Lysine, 500mg C, 595mg Potassium Gluconcate, 1 Super B-Complex
Sleep Quality: Felt refreshed in the morning. Slept solid. Solved pillow issues.

Trying to LD 2:00AM
I am jogging down a familiar street. I see Jeremy and Becki. I invite them over. We are now in my house. But this is my first house. Jeremy talks about how he can tell me how many ghost are here. I tell him I don't want to know. I feel happy and safe here and I don't want to ruin it.

Then I am in my first truck. I am in the passenger side trying to sleep. My wife is in the driver side sleeping but tossing and its bothering me. I am trying to WBTB. I have an audio induction and I want to hear it. I adjust my headphones and try to sleep. I couldn't help but notice that my headphones feel like underwear on my head. Then notice that is light outside and rainy. I see Chris driving up to her daughters house who happens to be my neighbor. I am a little surprised. I hope that she doesn't notice me and my underwear. She is all but starting at me now. I just sigh and close my eyes. All I want to do is have a lucid dream and If I have to do corny things like listen to my underwear then who cares. I actually hear some music. It is a Ke$ha song believe it or not.

*I hear the intro music*

"Maybe I need some rehab,
Or maybe just need some sleep
I've got a sick obsession,
I'm seeing it in my dreams"....

(Very appropriate! Except Lucid Dreams is my drug. Bahahahaha LOL)

I feel irritated and tune the music out. I feel like I am being watched and I just want privacy. The truck drives around the block. I don't notice it but I am driving it with my mind. My wife is in the driver seat but I am controlling where to go. Then I remember we left the kids in the house alone. And I think we should hurry even though we are just going around the block. I look out the window to the right and see a distorted iPhone. It says Brooklyn on it. The woman in the truck with me is now my ex-wife and she starts bitching about how much money she spent on that phone for my niece and now its ruined.

Now I am in a bed trying to WILD. Something wakes me and I look to the left and see my sisters husband with a bed pan under him. He is squirting shit through his clothes.
I say, "OH GOD! YOU NASTY FUCKER! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!?"
He jumps us and runs to the bathroom. He slams the bed pan on the floor and I see chunky shit splatter up on the wall. There is shit on the bed. I am disgusted but I feel sorry for him at the same time. I know he is sick and can't help it. Then my dog goes sniffing at it. I grab her too me and hold her. I lay there not wanting to deal with the mess. I half expect to smell something horrid but there's no smell. I close my eyes and wake up.

I Don't Want to Die!
My wife and I are in a hotel. She is not pregnant and we are partying. We are drinking and she starts to smoke pot. I am shocked but I'm like well we don't do this often. She leaves the bong on the couch and my dog daisy starts to hit it. She runs through an open door into a yard. Then she howls as she ex-hails. I find it strange that I see really black smoke come out. I am surprised at the color of smoke but I just laugh. She is trying to get more. I hand the bong to my wife who is in the recliner watching TV. Then I say wait let me. I take a long drag. I notice that there is no smell no burring in my throat and no taste. Then I ex hail. I instantly feel fucked up. I make a comment about how fast that hit me. She says she knows.

I leave the room for some errand. I walk outside and see a nice area with a pool. There are only a few people. I jump in and then leave.

I go inside a bar and walk through to the bathroom. I notice a bartender and a dart board in my periphrial vision. I sit down to shit in a stale but the toilet is so high people can see me. Some take notice and just sigh and finish up. When I walk out of the bathroom I am now in a church and service is about to start. I take in the whole scene. I notice people to my left conversing and greeting. I see a crown scattered about and people in various conversation. I see all the pews and the stage up front. The stage is blurry and I dont focus on it too much. I see another bathroom down a ways and too the right. For whatever reason I walk to that. I walk past the womens and enter the mens. It is dimly lit and there is one toilet on the right and a sink on the left back wall. The entire right wall is glass. I can see through into the womens bathroom. The bathroom is identical to the mens and I see a large woman pulling her pants down and sitting on the toilet. It seems that she cant see me and it think it must be a two way mirror. I try to respect her privacy and advert my eyes and quickly leave the restroom.

Then I am in an elevator. The interior is minimalistic, plush and cream color. (now that I think about it... like a casket!) I push a button. The elevator begins to malfunction. I feel it tilt back and get smaller. I an now lying at an incline. I push some other button. Then it compacts into a ceiling with metal beams. I hit the stop button. I am so stuck I can't move.

I quickly WILD to have an OBE to go get help. I see a lady at a desk. I tell her my body is stuck in an elevator and I need to get it out before I die. I move out of my body. It feels so natural and familiar to do this. I go through the wall and see a lady at a help desk. She is an African American woman in a red blose. I quickly explain to her that my body is trapped. She tells me a bunch of instructions. I dont remember. Maybe I am still stoned?

I go now to do whatever it is she told me. I am now walking through the spot where the pool is. I see a lot more people there and I don't bother to take a dip this time. I walk to a concrete walk and spot an elevator door. I feel that this is where my dying body is. I pry the door open with my hands. There are more doors behind the first. They are red with purple trim. I get through a total of four doors and my body slips out. I catch... me. My body is limp and cold. I find it very odd to touch my body from outside of myself. I drop... me. And I try to use my mind to enter back into my body. It does not work. I am getting panicky.

I scream, "I don't want to die!"

I lay down next to myself and try whatever I did to exit now to re-enter. Nothing is working. I look to my right at myself and see a hand with a respirator to my body's face. I see hands doing chest compressions. I am still not back in my body. The light fades and everything goes dark.


*Holy Shit. I think I will avoid elevators for a while.

Happy Skies

I am molesting a woman but she quickly puts me in my place. Then I see my wife bent over.
I press against her and say,"How much?"
She laughs and replys, "$100 and you can do whatever you like."
I get handsy with her and ask, "How about $50?"
She says, "For that you get a panty ride."
She is in just panties and a t-shirt and gives me a lap dance. I close my eyes in the dream and it feels amazing.

I suddenly open my eyes because the shock of it. (It is a false awakening) I want to go to bathroom and change but its like the dream the other day. There are people sleeping in odd places. I see my nephew asleep in the bathtub.
I realize am in a trailor house so I go to the other end. I see my dad asleep in a bed. I go to the bathroom. I start to change and I see red carpet in the bathroom. Something about this gives me a horrible memory and a bad aweful feeling. I think something like this is the house where that bad thing happened. I start to shake and feel scared(I honestly have no clue what that was about) But the feeling quickly passes. And I go about my bussiness.

As I walk out I see his eyes are open. He is just starting at the wall. I know he sees me but he doesn't move. I think maybe he is just half asleep still. Then, I hear him say something rude (can't remember what he said) I stop and look at him but just then my dad walks in. My dad tells my dad, "You stop that. What he does is perfectly natural and we all do it!"
I don't want this so I tell my dad, "Pleeeeease just let it go. Please."
(The man looked like my dad but didn't sound like my dad at all. He almost sounded feminine and flamboyant. Plus my dad talking to my dad... Whuuuuut?)

We walk outside. I look around and another trailer in front of us with a faded deck. I see mountains in the distance and a clear blue sky and I see a nebula thing in the day sky. Almost like that sky in Asgard in the Thor movie. I see a line of planets there to. They look brownish and dark with almost a grainy texture. There are very large ones and very smalls one. The large ones have what look like moons. The colors are bland. Mostly browns and yellows. I see a few stars in it though. I see texture and great detail. I stop and feel confused. I think how awesome the sight is.

Then, in a flash, I think, "wait something is odd. Something unnatural. This is not normal. I am dreaming!!!!!" I just know that I am dreaming. I don't even bother with RC. (Like I said before, if I have the mind to question, I just know)

I tell my dad. "Dad! We are dreaming!" As I begin to float I laugh and giggle breathlessly. I feel so giddy. I am so happy because I have been trying so hard lately.
The guy posing as my dad blows air out and looks scared. I think for a moment how I have had it in the back of my mind to find a dream guide. This guy may be the one. I let it go for now. I notice that I am touching the ground again
I say, "No really! We are dreaming."
I take his hand and use my other hand to push of the railing on the deck. We float up together a few meters. He is smiling and laughing quietly. I now know he believes me. I am out of breath with excitement. The entire scene is so vivid and so awesome. The sky is clear. I see the mountains in the distance. The summer grass below us is brown in spots. The air feels cool. I feel great peace.

I look back at the planets in the sky. They are very vivid pictures. Still there. I think how it looks like a text book. I study it so that I can remember the thing that made me lucid this time. I think, "Yes, strange things in the sky. Of course, that is a very old dream sign of mine."
Then suddenly I remember TOTM but before I could do anything every thing fades to black and I am back in my recliner with my eyes closed wishing it had not ended so soon.

LJS
...something about my wife got promoted...new freezers... I worry that she will be like the last guy that got caught having sex in the freezer. I blow it off because I know I trust her.

Then, I am working at my first job again. Long John Silvers. I am training some new hire and we are making potatoes. Sherry my old boss is talking to Sarah. I feel awkward because of what happened between us and I later snobbed her facebook request. I try to avoid her.I am rushing around. Getting ready to open the store.

Then I am outside. This Guy is talking to Jana. I am too far away to hear. She is sitting at a table under a large sign that you can put the black letters in. (idk what they call that) There was something about my wife and this guy before. She told me about him and how he always cheats on his women. Oh thats the guy that got fired.

So now I have control of the sign. I have keyboard but it is like I am texting here.
"Dooshbag. Major dooshbag. He will cheat on you." (idk why I spelled dooshbag like this but I know I was doing it on purpose) She replies on the sign something like an ads for church service on Sunday. I look at her like wtf. She smiles at me. Then he puts his hands on his butt runs off to the bathroom. She had put something in his food. I laugh so hard at this and the look on his face was priceless

1) Wife/Ex-Wife Confusion

Something about A TV featuring Joplin MO people. Something about the tornado. Blah. I got with my ex to a used car lot. It looks closed. We stop at a gas station instead and see the man I saw on TV behind the counter. My ex buys a pack of cigarettes. I say wait your pregnant and you supposedly quit. Then I think how is this even my baby. She said it was my baby. No my actual wife is the pregnant one not her. I do the math. And obviously this can't be my baby. There is no way I am paying child support for this one. I want to confront her but now we are at Perry and Marry's. I think this doesn't make sense for my ex to come here. These people are apart of my now wife's family. I felt so confused because my past was blending with the present. I wake up suddenly.

2) A Dreamviews Member Visit
I was in a video store with my wife and daughters. They are leaving and I follow but my eye catches a game Snatchers 2 for Sega CD. I am so surprised that to see this because I loved the first one back in the day. It is for sale for $1.50 so I buy it. Then I realize I don't have Sega CD anymore and I wonder how I can play it. I think maybe there is an emulator for PC that will play the game.

I go outside to meet up with my wife and kids and I see a man come riding up on a motorized scooter. I am so surprised to see Wurlman! I greet him and say something about him coming all the way to Joplin on a scooter. He points to my wife and asks if that was her. So I give formal introductions and wake up.

1)I was still with my ex wife and she was being a bitch. Thats all I want to say about this one

2)I saw an ex girlfriend. She text me and wanted to come over just as friends. I said OK that would be fine. I am with my wife now and I think oh no. This might be bad. I get a text that she is here. I go outside and part of me remembers her and misses what we had but that was a long time ago. We give each other a friendly hug. Then I tell her this might not be a good time. My wife will not like this. She laughs me off and goes inside. I find my wife and her talking and getting along. I relax but think this was a stupid idea.

3)This one make little sense. I am with my wife and I make a Geocaching t-shirt but the shirt itself is the geocache. Its like we are younger and we are with her college friends. Its like this is some sort of school project. Some one donates a camcorder and we want to set it up to see people finding the geocache. I tell the dud with the camcorder that whomever gave that know they may not see it again right? He just shrugs.The my wife and a girl are with the dude trying to interview people on the street about.... I don't know... Geocaching? Some people say no and they get very pushy about it. And some people are glad to interview. The whole time me and another dude are making crafts that make no sense. Like tires with a shape in the middle full of paint. Then its like we get bored or run out of time and start packing things up. I feel disappointed that we didn't get to finish but glad to be done.

1) A minister prayed for me and black goo came out of my hands and vanished. I felt cleansed and at peace. Then my bro in law, A, was suspect. We convinced him and his wife. She said ew get it out. The minister said I had to do it but I didn't believe. in myself enough. It was only partial and he saw paralyzed with fear as the black goo ran from his hands.

* religious dreams have a deeper meaning to me. This dream was about some negative emotions and stress at my job. It is up to me to have a different attitude.

2) My wife kids and I were at an annual carnival. it was huge this year with rides. I think my wife is pregnant and she can't ride. I felt bad for her. I see my ex and her mom. oh great look who it is. I wonder around looking for addmission prices. A security guard stops me and tells me I can't cut in line. I tell him I. just want to know admission prices. He says he's doesn't know. I ask him why he's such an ass? He says alright fine its $2.

* Both dreams very vivid and deatailed. I left details out because of time.

So I took a WILD nap today.

I find myself bouncing from too much awareness to losing consciousness. I would start to get slight vibrations and tremors. A few times I felt my head pick up and slam down. My body switched a few times. All this jolted me back to too much wakefulness. So I kinda let go and almost give up on it. That must have been enough. Because suddenly I find myself with the beginnings of SP. So I tried focusing on my head but what I ended up doing is rolling my eyes back. It worked like a magic button. Immediately got full SP. Not so much in my legs though. Mostly my head and arms. But still this was it!

The vibrations subsided and I heard a loud high pitch shrieking tearing sound as I felt the top half or my body slip out of itself. I try to get out of bed but I legs wont work. I lean over the side of the bed but my legs are glued into place and my body is on the floor. I try to move my legs but they are paralyzed. I look around but I see with one eye the mirror on the wall and with the other eye the carpet on the floor. My dream hand feel the floor. I think "I am lucid but I'm just halfway in my body!"

I jolt back awake. I don't move. I just roll my eye back and boom! SP again. Then I feel myself sit up out of my body with the same indescribable sounds. And my legs and feet are still stuck.
I wake up.

I repeat the whole thing several times not giving up and a little surprised I can keep it going.

I heard the shrieking tearing sound again. And then something else like many people running or a subway car on the tracks. So this time I visualized a subway station. I looked at my feet and just like in the Matrix and saw it all rush to me and my feet touched the subway floor.

Now to be honest. There is a lot here that I forgot. The feeling and flashes that I remember is just me running around like a lunatic being overly happy that I am finaly lucid again. I feel like a god in my personal universe. I feel so powerful. (I'll have to learn some control)

(Also this lucid dream was very non-vivid. Almost as if you were just sitting and fantasizing about whatever. That's how dull the visuals were. And probably why I forgot parts. I did at least have some very real physical sensations.)

Then of course, I get horny. I walk into the womens locker room. Shower. I hear a woman scream. But the shower is empty. I keep looking and hear little girly shrieks. I run to another room and see a bath tub shower curtain. I move the shower curtain and it sounds like little girls but they run like a vampires. Like flesh colored streaks. They are just so ethereal and ghostly. I look for them and cant find them. One went behind me and one strait through the wall in the shower. I turn around and see a sink and mirror and door in the direction the one went but the door is boarded over and shut.

Wait! What the hell? These are little girls anyway and thats gross. I'm lucid and I'm waisting it on being horny!?

I look around again. OMG MIRROR TOTM! I walk to the mirror and look closely at myself. I am whereing a plain grey hoodie. My face and hair look pretty much normal. For some reason I am making really crazy looking faces at myself but I don't feel it on my face. I look closer and I look normal but not normal. Kinda blurry.

OK enough. Go into the mirror. CAN'T. SOLID! I move back the mirror got smaller. Like the size of my laptop screen. I look and find another mirror on the wall. I place my head into. SOLID. I press really hard. I feel something give and I look around but it is just black darkness and then I am pushed back out. I try again but it solid once more. I notice that I can feel no sensation on my head so I really am dreaming. I wont why I can do in. I move back. No I am holding the mirror and there is a giant wall mirror behind a metal rack thing. I look at myself again. Trying to clear things up and really see. I look the same with a goofy expression. I press my head in again. SOLID.

I begin I wake. I feel myself in bed. I thought I felt my wife moving around and thats why I woke up. I assumed she came home from work and found me napping so she joined me. I later realized my logic was totally wrong and I was still asleep.

I went for the SP again. I rolled my eyes back in my head and concentrated on my skull. Yep get the tingles but as strong. Then I thought about what I was going to do which got me thinking about the whole experience and how I was starting to forget is all.

I wake up for real this time. Alone and it had only been 2hrs.

I was wish my wife. She and her friends were dressed like power rangers. I forgot my costume. I ask why she didn't say anything because I just went home to change and now I have to go back.

Conversation about this Guy who was trying to have a baby with his girlfriend when he was 15. I asked was this with my wife? All together was a resounding NOOOOOO! I believed them because I knew better anyway.

1.
Somehow I know my wife is a big shot executive in a hospital. I am lost and wondering around in a hospital (dream sign) looking for my wife. There is a very "Grey's Anatomy" feel to it (I hate that show). I find my sister in a glass room. It is a recording studio. She opens the door for her daughter and my sister smiles at me.

2.
I see my other sister and her ex husband. I hate the man. But they are happy together and they get in a helicopter (possible dream sign). They ask me if I want a ride. I say no because I just don't like him. They start to lift off and I tell them I changed my mind because I have always wanted to go on a helicopter. They go back to the ground and I reluctantly climb on a what looks like a black hawk with an open side. We fly off and I try to take pictures with my phone (possible dream sign) but I can only see so far and then it fades to black.