Xanous' Dream Journal

#418 - MILD - 5:13AM

Coffee (Caffeine) 2tbsp brewed. 4tbsp sugar and about 1/8 cup milk
I wake about 3:45am from a vivid dream and decide it's too close to my 4:00AM alarm to go back to sleep so I go ahead and get up just long enough to drink my coffee. I return to bed thinking about the dream I just had and what it would have been like if I had become lucid. I quickly drop into sleep.


I wake my daughters up to get ready for school. There is some conversation and I randomly climb out a window in a hallway. The house is a two story and I come out on a low part of the roof. I am trapped because a woman who looks like Michonne in a Sonic uniform is on a ladder that is some how blocking my exit. I tap her on the lag and politely ask her to move. She tells me to hold on so I just find away to squeeze past. As I climb down off the roof I tell the woman and her associate that I am leaving for work so if they have any questions ask my wife. I tell them to just call for Janice (That's my mom's name... awkward.) I feel like this isn't the right name so I start to tell them they can just call for Mrs. Coon but I stop myself because they might thing I am trying to make an inappropriate joke. I wonder why they are here and what they are working on. Oh they must be installing tile. On the roof? Maybe it's something else.

I as I drop down I land inside the house. There is a ladder on a wall that is made of tape measure. I fiddle with it noting how flimsy it is. I decide it probably won't hold my weight so I leave it alone. I remember that I should be getting to work so I check the time on my cell phone in my pocket. 11:25am. Wow I am really late!

I look up and find myself at work. Robert M. is saying something about taking a half day vacation then says he better clock in. I think it's a little late for half day so I check the time again. 10:10AM. I become confused about the time and decide I better just clock in. I start typing my employee number and pause as I recall how I was just in my 'house' and suddenly I am at work. Then there's the time thing...Then, it finally dawns on me. I must be dreaming. I feel a wry smile come on my face and I step away from the computer. The dream collapses at this point, but I manage to get things back in order by focusing on what I should be seeing. Things are a bit unstable now but I think I can work with it.

I wonder about goals, but when I see a bulletin board I think I should try reading it. I do my best read out loud the wobbly and changing words. [something][something] on a cob. That make absolutely no sense. Now the dream is really unstable so I try rubbing my hands then the carpet. I notice it has a red and gold pattern.

Things get a bit more stable so I decide to walk outside while still rubbing my hands. I can't help but feel that I am literally holding the dream together by pure concentration. I tell myself there is plenty of time and I should relax. I feel my shoulders drop a bit and become at ease. Because of this the dram instantly fades away. I try DEILD with the phase method, but I am too wide awake. I decide to spend some time meditating before I get up.

#412 - DILD - 6:35AM

I am walking up a hill with my younger daughter and son. For some reason I am going to some apartments to take a swim. I tell myself that if I am going to live here, I need to figure out how to park on the other side so I don't have to walk so far all the time. Some triggers semi-lucidity and the walk up the hill feels hard and slow. I realize that this is all a mental thing and tell myself to just pretend that it's all super easy and it will be. It works for a second and gets difficult again at the last few steps.

I am inside the apartment but it all looks really odd. I feel this is normal for a dream so I let it go and try to ignore it. I have my son in my arms and for some reason think I need to put him down for a nap. There is a door way that I think leads to his bedroom, but when I open it, it is just a broom closet. I know this is all pointless so I unceremoniously toss my son into the darkest part of the closet and walk way. I feel a mental tug to do it right, but I don't want to get caught up in mundane tasks in a dream. I am still really caught up in going swimming so I try to find the back door. As I make my way outside, I pass though some tiny kitchen that I recognize to look like a small version of the duplex I used to live in.

Outside, my lucidity raises as I look around for a pool. I see an above ground pool to the right, but quickly reject that. I look to the left and see my younger daughter jumping into a large in-ground pool. Excited, I run and jump and yell, "JEEEERRRONIMOOOOO!", as I belly flop into the pool. As I make impact I worry that my vision will get distorted and I end up in the void. Of course, this thought manifests as I see a blur of blue and air bubbles and the dream fades.

The lights come on and I wake up with my son in the bed with me and my wife. He's crying and some liquid has pooled up all over the sheets. Not sure if he peed out of his diaper, I ask, "Why is everything so wet?"
My wife just says, "He's been crying." I realize that there is no way a kid can tear up that much and remember that I was just now dreaming that I was swimming. The lights do out and I roll over and make swimming motions in the dark until I reach my wife. I start kissing her and decide maybe some sexy-time would be nice. The light returns and my wife stops me. She asks, "Right now? [in front of R?]
I tell her that it doesn't matter [in a dream]. We continue to enjoy each other, but I wake up before we get very far.

Aids:1/8 tea peppermint oil before bed
Methods:DEILD/WILD - FA
Morning Suppliments:500mg L-Lysine, 500mg C, 595mg Potassium Gluconcate, 1 Super B-Complex
Sleep Quality: Light, wakefulness, RLS

Huge Storm 1:12 AM
Huge storm coming. Riding with dad. I see storm shelter. I hear some song that reminds me of someone. And then another song. I remember an ex-girlfriend.
"I say I hate all songs."
I see Jeremy and Jess in the car with us.
"What song? I say do tunes to what you want."

Dude, Where's My Car? 3:15 AM ish

I am at my parents sleeping in a recliner. It is dark and I can't sleep.
I went to my parents with the kids. I am leaving. But I can't find my car. I see a white car that is stripped down. The kids think it's mine but I know better. We run down the street looking for it. I feel tired and weak and can't run well. I see white cars everywhere but none are mine. I don't want to call the police yet because I keep thinking that I remember that I parked in a strange place and I knew I would not remember. I tell the kids this.

Now we are in some nursing home and wondering around. Not sure what happens here. Something about me not being a good enough Christian. How I let bad things into my life. Thats why bad things happen. Some old woman? I feel guilty for lucid dreaming like it is a sin.

We leave. I tell my kids we got to look some more before we call the cops. Deanna says that Dalynn already did. I asked her about that. It was when I was holding her and she blew into a strange balloon.
She says, "Well that lady scared me. So I called the cops."
We run outside but I feel overwhelmed and too tired to walk. I lay down in the grass and dirt. I curl up on a mound of dirt. I tell the kids I just want to close my eyes. My body relaxes and I wake up.

WILD 3:30AM ish
When I wake up I am in the recliner that I moved to because of my RLS. I don't move a muscle. I relax myself and I roll my eyes into the back of my head and focus on my skull. Sleep Paralysis almost immediately kicks in.

I hear the familiar strong wind sound laced with rinings of the ears. I feel the familiar vibrations and windy sensations. I noticed this time that the sound and vibrations increased and decreased in intensity like waves on a beach. I make a quick note of this. I can feel my legs moving up. It feels like something has me by the ankles. I become afraid and I have to remind myself it is not real. I try to enter the dream but I get stuck in SP for longer than I wanted and because of the last dream I thought I was doing something evil. I keet telling myself that it was ok. And it wasn't real. You do this all the time and its always been fine. No good, the feeling was persistent.
I try to ignore the thoughts and visualise anything to move on. I my mind wonder and my dream eyes see.

I see a road. I am flying low and fast down a vivid and brightly lit road road hugged tightly by evergreen trees. I enjoy this but my eyes begin to opened and I see the dark living room with one eye and the road with the other.

I go back into full SP. Still the same feeling of guilt. I think that this is getting no where and I want to go back to my bed. So I suddenly and forcibly make myself get up. I stumble back to my bedroom. I heard and felt my loud footsteps.

I think how odd this is. I was feeling the vibrations like wind on my body. The loud sound of wind and ringing. Typical SP. Was it possible to not be truly paralyzed in sp?

I now find myself tangled in my blanket. I am standing by my bed and I can't find my way out. I am unsure of what happened. I feel so confused and my mind feels numb.

I say, "I'm dreaming. I'm dreaming." But my voice sounds odd. It is weak and unsure. Almost like I am asking a question. I am not convinced. Then I throw myself in the bed. Now I can find my way out. I feel half asleep and strange.

All my actions have woke my wife up. My wife mocks me. And complains how this is not good what I'm doing. She is pissed I woke her. I feel embarrassed and say nothing. She gets up to go the bathroom. I close my eyes and relax. But instead of going to sleep I wake up still in the recliner. God dammed FA!

I was so sure I was awake.

Aids:12.8mg menthol before bed
Methods:Attempted WBTB WILD - Failed
Morning Suppliments:500mg L-Lysine, 500mg C, 595mg Potassium Gluconcate, 1 Super B-Complex
Sleep Quality: Heavy sleep. No RLS. Tired still this morning. Pillow not comfortable

Fish Dog
I am walking outside and the world is flooded up to my calves. I have this fish that is following me. It is my pet but it is behaving like a dog. It is jumping up at me and swimming around me and wanting my attention. I smile at it and continue to walk. I look up briefly and check the sky to do a sky RC like I do in waking life. I see nothing unusual or odd so I shrug it off and continue.

Then I get an underwater view of the fish swimming. Like a camera is following from behind. The water is clear. The fish looks like some sort of evolved fish with legs and large teeth. Kind of alligator-ish. It is just dog paddling and half turns its head to acknowledge me.

Then I am inside my house. Or a house. I am walking around and the Fish and the water are still present. I wonder how I could have all this water in my house and not rot everything out. I assume it is built to handle it. I look closer and start to see odd things like there is carpet and the floor is not level. I think that this really needs to be fixed and I worry some about it. I am really questioning why there is water everywhere but I just don't think about testing reality.

Then I am looking at a fake rock pond. I see a large golden Cichlid. I recognize it as one of the same fish that I had in an aquarium long ago. (I feel guilty because I remember that I flushed it down the toilet because I got tired of it. It wasn't even dead.) I add more water with my mind because I notice the fish didn't have much room. It keeps trying to swim upward.

Forgotten
Damn lazy ass didn't write it down!
Forgotten
Damn lazy ass didn't write it down!

House Sitting
My mom and I are going over to my Aunts house to check on it since her and her family are gone on a long trip. We go in the front door and look from room to room. The house is familiar but different. I tell my mom it looks a lot like my first house I bought but they really changed a lot of stuff and it looks really nice. The kitchen has a door and it is partially sealed. We get it open and the first thing I see is dirty dishes that have bee sitting for days. I half expect it to stink but I smell nothing. I look and see really nice title floors and counters. I look down a hall and see a bath tub and linoleum. I am turned off by that and go back the other way. In the living room we decide to leave.

We get outside and I see a man in a truck in the yard yell at me to let him in. He is the exterminator and needs in. My mom and I wonder why an exterminator would come so late in the day. It is about to get dark. Before I could do anything I get distracted by my older daughter and my two mini dachshunds. We all go back inside and I worry that one of the dogs will pee. I tell my daughter not to touch her because she will get too excited and pee on the carpet.

Interpretations: None at the moment