Xanous' Dream Journal

#392 - WILD - 3:44AM

Almost an hour WBTB with some meditation and the usual Galantamine dose.

I focus on body awareness and quickly enter into a very long transition in vibrations and SP. I use every trick I can think of to get the dream going but it's being very stubborn. I forget most of the sensations, but it was all very typical for me and only mildly interesting. Eventually, I find myself floating listlessly above the foot of the bed. I look up and see the floor. I am upside down so I reach for the floor landing on all fours. I crawl out of the bedroom into the living room, heading for the front door. I feel very weak and gravity is extra heavy. The dream is very unstable and non-vivid but it's all I've got right now. I continue to crawl, making very little progress. I know I need to stand, but the thought of it seems impossible. I tell myself, "Don't be a pussy." as I use all my will to stand up.

As I stagger to the front door I see a line of dead bolts spin to the unlocked position. I was grateful for this, because the thought of manually unlocking all them seems like an impossible task at the moment. I feel hopeful as I reach outside but the dream is still really unstable. I float to the grass in the yard and feel with my hands as I revert back to crawling. I note the texture and feel as my legs drag across long blades. I recall Jenkees' dare to have theatrical music and try to conjure up something. The Indiana Jones Theme song begins to play in my ears. This is all wrong for the moment so I shake the sound out my mind. At this point the dream decides to crash.

I wake up feeling mentally exhausted and decide to hope for DILD later. I mantra "Remember mindfulness" as I fall back to sleep.

#393 - DILD - 4:07AM

Originally Posted by From Ringworld, by Larry Niven.

"I have a variable-sword," said Speaker-to-Animals. "I urge calm." The kzin stood against a curved wall. In one clawed fist he held something like an oversized jump rope handle. Ten feet from the handle, held expertly at the level of the kzin's eyes, was a small, glowing red ball. The wire which joined ball to handle was too thin to be visible, but Louis didn't doubt it was there. Protected and made rigid by a Slaver stasis field, the wire would cut through most materials including the back of Louis's crash couch.

I am at an old slave house back in the 1800's. The door is boarded up but I manage to breakthrough. I feel compassion and want to free them all. I load everyone up into covered wagon and try to think of a way to get them to the underground railroad.

I have a mini wake-up but fall right back to sleep. I am now in a mixture of my basement and the old dirt floor garage from a house I lived in as a child. I am mindlessly digging up the dirt floor wanting to make a tunnel. As I do this I recall the previous dream. I notice how odd it is that the dirt just vanishes as I dig. It's very minecraft-life. After a moment I pause and stare out a window in a door. Something feels off. I remember to be mindful and quickly recognize this as a dream.

I step outside now unconcerned with digging. I quickly recall one of my goals. I want to revisit the lightsaber play from a non-lucid dream that I had last week while taking another stab at the theatrical music. Recalling the visuals, I blind summon a red lightsaber and give it a few spins. It looks good at first but the light quickly fades out as I walk around the house. I come around the side and see a very strange and distorted version of my Dodge with all sorts of attachments jutting out from the sides.

I look at my lightsaber, but it only look like a laser pointer as I stare at a red dot on the driveway. I decide this is ok because it is now a variable-sword like the one in Ringworld. I flick my wrist and make a cut at one of the chrome appendages on the car. I see it slice a very thin line but it doesn't fall off. I go ahead and give a tap making the thing drop away. I make another slash at the side-view mirror with the same effect. Ok that's kind of cool. Now I need my music. I try to summon something, but all I get is random humming in my head that sounds pretty weak and ridiculous. I let it go for now and wonder around with my sword.

To my left, I see smoke from a something like a brush pile, and to my right, I see a tree covered with Christmas lights. I am torn between the two; looking back-and-forth. This seems to do something strange with my eyes causing my eyelids to flit open, waking me up.

#389 - DILD - 11:39PM


Bedtime: 9:30-10:00PM

I was surprised by an early night lucid last night. I don't have much for the entry because I nearly forgot it. I did my best to recall upon awaking but I was so tired that I quickly fell back into a non lucid dream before I could make and entry.

I should note that I was trying to get lucid prebed. I simply fell asleep being totally aware of all body sensations similar to an SSILD short cut.

I find myself lucid talking with some woman. I am having a hard time understanding and retaining what she is saying but I feel like the information is important. I tell her that I can't understand her and the word appear in a font on a wall from something like and overhead projector. I start reading but my words sound like gibberish and I quickly realize the words are just random letters or something like a foreign language. I shout about how nothing is making any sense.

I have an FA and tell Rex about a lucid dream that involved the three stooges. For some reason I have trouble pronouncing 'stooges'.

I am in a field hiding behind a log having a bow and arrow shootout. I am loosing and shout at a woman to help. I call her by my wife's name. I know this is the wrong name but I just go with it. I look over the log and see a guy running up on my. I shoot him with an arrow but there is no tip and it looks bent a broken. I only hope the close range does some damage. As I release the arrow I shout, "Die mother fucker!"

2:00AM
Since my LD was so weak, I decide to go ahead and do my WBTB. After a period abstinence the day before, I have 1/2 a bottle frappuccino (about 6-7oz.) at WBTB. I was really tired and didn't stay up longer than a few minutes of trying to rouse myself in the kitchen. I feel asleep once again focused on body sensations and repeating goals as a mantra. I didn't get lucid but I had some very vivid and cool dreams.

2:48AM

I am extremely late for work at my parents old house. I try to put a lunch together. I look in the fridge but nothing looks good or right.

4:03AM (Star Wars KOTOR style)

I am walking through a starship with some battle companions. There are large orbital droids with blue force fields attacking us. I fight back with a red light saber and force push powers. The lightsaber hilt resembles a blue baseball bat handle. I find it looks odd but feels very nice in my hand and gives me great maneuverability. I make a lot fancy movements putting my weapon into a blur of red as I spin and slash through my enemies. My force push shows some light faint blue energy from my hands as the droids smash into walls and shatter. At one point I lose focus and miss a droid with my lightsaber. I think to throw my lightsaber but fear it wont return. The droid glides over my head and behind me. I try force pushing behind my back but it misses. I do a backwards thrust with my lightsaber and cut the droid in half without looking. At one point I assist my friend with a blue lightsaber by trusting my lightsaber to the hilt into a larger droid. I watch as the metal turns molten.

I am now separated from my companions but I think I see the one with the blue lightsaber enter something like steel elevator doors. I follow and cautiously peer into a small corridor with gold shimmering beams of light along the walls. I can sense danger and I decide to pause. As I step back I see a new type of ominous looking droid materialize before me. I dodge a red streak of blaster fire as the doors close. I consider reentering to attack but my lightsaber is now acting crazy. There seems to be some red light poking out of the butt of the bat handle and the lightsaber and I am able to use my finger to push it back in. It doesn't hurt me and when I look back at the other end, I see that the beam of hot red death is now a harmless balloon. As I run away from battle I notice that I can hear air hissing into the balloon causing it to enlarge into an irregular shape. I try to hold back the air but the balloon continues to grow. I panic that I will be without a weapon and pat my side for a blaster. Then I remember that I can use the force and I drop the now useless lightsaber with new confidence.

I come to the end of a metallic corridor and find a large air duct. I recall that this was the way I sneaked in but I sort of feel that I am just making this all up now. I find the space is much smaller than I thought and as I try to squeeze in, I become super claustrophobic. I look for another way out and see Darleen from work exiting the corridor through a side door. I follow after her and wake up.

5:19AM (Snooze alarm)

I am at work and see there isn't much to do. I ask Darleen what the deal was and she said there was a problem in Engineering. She tells me that when is all resolved she will be "dancing with joy."
I jokingly ask, "Who is this Joy person?" Everyone laughs.