Xanous' Dream Journal

#373 - DILD - 12:11AM

I went to bed around 10pm after watching Grimm and Constantine so I was really prepared to enjoy some crazy dreams and hoped for a DILD ( I think this dream was more inspired by "The Last Airbender"). I was a little shocked how early this LD happened, though this seems to happen a lot, it's just a matter of recall. Unfortunately, my recall is full of holes and lucidity was low for the most part. Some possible chemical influences: I enjoyed a 40 oz of Mickey's stretched throughout the evening. I also took a Zyrtec and used some Veramyst nasal spray for my horrendous allergy problem that I currently experiencing. gahhhh!

Another thing to explain the content of the dream is that I have been doing some recreational reading on erowid.

I have taken an abusive but fairly low dose of Dextromethorphan Hbr (100mg). I see what I think of as tracers and some mild distortions of reality. The experience is fairly enjoyable but I have some nervous twitches and body jerks that I try to hide and only allow myself to experience when I am alone. I have some conversation with a dream character and wonder off.

I begin to feel really sleepy now and almost consider taking another dose of DXM but decide that would be really dangerous. I eventually lay down someplace and fall asleep.

I have a dream inside the dream. This is were my memory has gaps. I am involved in some story line about a young man that has ice powers. I see him and my son on a carpet gliding over a snowy landscape and seamlessly crossing over land water/ice. They seem to be in awe but this is nothing new to me.

I have a moment of lucidity here. I show some female DC how they are gliding over water and ice. I walk out into the ice but it breaks. It feel cold at first but I generate some heat in my body to feel warm. Then I use some ice power to re-freeze the water. I step on it but it breaks right away. The young man (who looks a lot like the helper in "Waterbending #2) comes to aid me. He freezes the water while I am in it and then pulls me out. I have ice encases on my legs and it looks like knee-high boots made of ice. I marvel at this for a moment and then feel the dream slipping away. I am not sure what to do other than look at the boy and focus on him visually. My concentration wavers.

Now I am talking to my wife like it was all a movie or TV series that we have been watching. I spoke as if it was my story but portrayed by actors. I mention something how they stuck really close to what actually happened. I told her that I might really be "The Drac", meaning the dragon. I talk about how ice doesn't bother me and I can generate high amounts of heat with Chi energy.

*huge memory gap*

I am somehow lucid again and talking to the DreamGuide/Avatar. I can't recall the actual conversation but I have a gist of what was said. I talked about our powers. I ask him something... I think I wanted his name. He says something and I respond, "This IS a dream but go on."
He says something really profound but in a confusing way. I sum up what he was trying to say in one sentence. He responded like he was impressed with me but also annoyed. I worry that I will forget what he said but I feel confident that I will remember my summary of it so I let it go. I am really excited about whatever he told me and anxious to write it all down.(I am so pissed I don't remember this! )

We enjoy some using some fire and ice magic together though I don't recall much of this. My fire magic never produced flame; just high amounts of heat that melted ice. I should explore this again.

*memory gap* (or just non lucid)

Lucid again. Trying to focus on the dream so I won't wake up. I wake up.

color code:
Gray = Comments
Black = Non-Lucid
Bold = non lucid dream cues
Italics = dream thoughts
Red = Lucid

I wake briefly and feel wakeful so I go for WILD. I have a lot of very heavy hypnagogia making it super easy.

#193 - 6:00AM - WILD - 2 of 2

I see a scene almost movie like. I am lucid but have no control. I am looking around behind the shed in my back yard. There is something hidden there or buried underneath that I don't want anyone to find. I want it to stop so it doesn't get discovered. I have great anxiety.

I turn around and see 5 from the movie 9 in a cage but its made of wicker and hay. I trust my hand through the weak wall of hay on the bottom half and pull him out

I turn around again and I am in my ex-in-laws drive way. I phase through the glass of the bay windows and see my ex's brother lying on a mattress. There is darkness but I wait it out until things clear up. I see him lying there at first in jeans then naked. I feel extreme hatred for him and bite his dick off. I feel something in my mouth but it feels like I am biting my bottom lip. There is no pain but the shock of what I just did wakes me a little. I promised myself I was going to treat DC's like waking life from now on.

I am standing at the kitchen sink rinsing out the coffee pot. Somehow I realize I just chugged the whole thing and was about to make another pot. I feel odd about this and tell myself I am dreaming. I feel like I am lying to myself but I go with it anyway.

I put grounds and water together in the pot and set it on the stove for a second with no fire. I tell myself that if this is a dream it will be perfect coffee without my trying. I pick up the coffee and put my hand in it. I looks normal and feels hot already. OK fine. I fully believe that I am dreaming now and gather my sense of self. I focus and try to think of goals. I realize that I am in my house so I go for the card. I wonder if that same idea applies even-though this is not an OBE. Still, I figure it will be fun to try.

When I get into the next room. I see darkness but totally ignore it and just visualize what I was going to do. I feel myself pull up to the top of the china cabinet. At the top I can see again. There is the card. I pick up up and at first it is the 9 of diamonds but the diamonds then morph to hearts. I jump down and walk back into the kitchen were there is more light. When I look at the card again it is half jack half king of clubs. I stare at it and laugh out loud and how funny this looks. I flip the card over and am a little shocked that is black and says Fallout on the back. (I totally forgot that I used the deck of Fallout New Vegas playing cards!) I also note that the card is thin like paper. I shrug the strangeness off and flip the card back over. It is now jack/queen of clubs. I stop. I turn to my daughter who has been looking over my shoulder. When the hell did that start? I say to her, "OK. I need to focus." I think, What is the card really? I set all my intent to really seeing the true card. When I look again it is the 7 of diamonds then the diamond turn to circles. 7 of diamonds. Good enough. I drop the card and in doing so the dream fades to black. No worries. Next dream please! (When I later looked at the card it was the 5 of diamonds. Close!)

I am back in bed and feel rather randy. Amy Pond from DW comes to mind. She instantly appears and I begin having sex with her.



After some time I begin to feel guilty and I try to imagine my wife. A blond version of her shows up and I finish with her. It was very detailed but, once again, I'll spare the reader and save myself some embarrassment.

Horrible segment I know but at least I tried to make it right!

After that, I have a false awakening but I am not at all fooled by it. I think about waking myself for real to record the dream but remember that I told myself I would do that again. I'll just have to trust that I'll remember all when I wake up. I get out of bed thinking must have messed myself. For some reason I am wearing jeans shorts. I find that odd since I haven't owned a pair since the 90's. I laugh a little at that.

Then, I notice something on my hands. It looks like some kind of thick clear goo like egg white. OMG that's so gross! I rush to the bathroom and begin to wash my hands in the sink. I note how real it all feels. I think I should probably just ignore it until it goes away but I become distracted by my reflection in the mirror. I sing a little tune while studying my reflection. "I'm lucid, I'm lucid, I'm so lucid..."

Now I really do forget about washing as my reflection morphs into many different versions of me. Most of them look dark and creepy. Some are zombie like and some are just plain evil. I don't worry about it and find it all very amusing. At some point I think to morph in to a Blutbad or werewolf. I naturally shift into it like I have before but this time I have the pleasure of closely watching it all happen up close in the mirror. I let out a low growl to help it all along. the low rumble coming from deep in my throat sounds and feels very convincing. I look down and see my hands are elongated, furry, with long sharp Wolverine claws. I relax and shift back to normal, then step back a little to get a clear view of my normal self. All the shifty morphing has stopped now and my reflection becomes clear and sharper than it had been. I look a little prettier than waking life and I say out loud, "Damn, I'm good looking!" Then for fun I go full werewolf and back again.

I decide to play a little more but this time I focus on my teeth. I open my mouth a little and try to give myself vampire fangs. My teeth look really dirty and brownish but ignore that. At first just the typical two canines slowly grow out and become sharp. I was feeling pleased with my abilities when suddenly all my teeth grow out long and sharp. At that, I decide that I've had enough and become interested with the mirror itself.

My teeth looked like Prisoner Zero from DW:


I tentatively push on the mirror with one finger. Again it feels as solid as stone. I push a little harder with my full palm but it doesn't change. I remember to focus on there being no glass. I try to reach behind my reflection but instead of just my arm going in, I fall in head first. The reflection becomes another room with it's own dept and realism. I feel a stuck at the waist for a moment and I feel the barely contained panic expression on my face. Almost like embarrassment. I force myself to relax and wiggle through. There's a split second of darkness starting to settle in as I fall through and become a little disoriented. Again I just ignored the darkness and it goes away.

I stand up and look around. The bathroom reminds me of a small restroom that was connected my class room when I was in Kindergarten so long ago. I hear a class bell and feel like I better get moving. There are two doors on both sides of the room. The right side feels like the way to go as I think the left must go back to my bedroom. I exit right.

Now I am in a large school that seems similar to my elementary school. I begin running down long hallways at high speed. The feeling reminds me of playing Skyrim so I try to make magic appear in my hands. I hold them up like on the game and visualize. I see some faint glow in both hands, the left is orange like fire and the right is blue like ice. I don't feel like it's getting there fast enough so I hold them more to my side vision as I focus on running. I pass many open class rooms full of desks and shelves of stuff. I don't really see any people. Now, there is a definite energy ball forming in both hands. I begin to ready myself for some real magic but I suddenly wake up without warning.

Just fragments. I was too tired to record or remember 3 other dreams. All I got is this one.

Royal Magic
I am royalty. I am looking to buy to mansion. I am with a realtor. Suddenly attacked. I can use magic. The spell I used was dark magic and my appearance turned dark.

The attacker said, "You turn bad?"

I reply, "Come see how bad I am!"

I see a brief Skyrim menu were I can pick spells.
The dream skips ahead. I am battered and bloody but I attacker lays dead at my feet.

Another fragment... I heard a loud pitched whistling like in SP. I begin walking around and found that same celebrity from my programmer dream (Justin Long) holding a whistle. I suspect I sort of WILDd but didn't realize it.