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    1. #1
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      A Short Story for My English Class

      Unfortunately, my English 9 teacher is going over nouns with us. Please contain your excitement. Fortunately, we get to write a short story using fifteen certain nouns. I will not tell you them. You can guess if you like, but it doesn't matter. Here is my story.

      The Story with No Name

      There once was a very magical kingdom on a world called Earth. The kingdom was called Chicago. The story I am about to tell you has nothing to do with this kingdom and never will.
      Far, far away, farther than the magical kingdom of Chicago, farther than infinity, was another kingdom. This kingdom had no name. It was not magical. The kingdom was full of castles, witches, talking trees, and walking forests. There was absolutely no magic to the place.
      There was a prisoner in this kingdom. Like the kingdom, he had no name. For simplicity’s sake, he shall be referred to as Bob throughout the story. Now, Bob was a prisoner to an evil maniac. The evil maniac did have a name, it was Evil Maniac. His underlings called him Mr. Maniac. Mr. Maniac created things. What kind of things? Mr. Maniac manufactured mirrors. In fact, that was his company’s motto, Mr. Maniac Manufactures Mirrors. His company did not have a name.
      Let’s get back to Bob though, shall we? Bob was a blacksmith. Bob used to smith swords and such until Mr. Maniac locked his blacksmithing tools away in a tower. It was a tower inaccessible to anyone, not even Mr. Maniac. So, how he accomplished such a feat no one will ever know. What we do know is that Bob had been working for Mr. Maniac for four years since then. Mr. Maniac did not pay his workers. Four hard years of intense manual labor, fourteen hours a day, followed up by a petite bowl of cold spaghetti for supper. The spaghetti was like ice, and was not very satisfying.
      One day, as Bob worked strenuously on manufacturing mirrors, an apple fell from the sky. That’s right, the sky. There was no roof to the factory of Mr. Maniac. This means when it stormed the workers were dampened by the rain and there was always the risk of being hit by lightning. One nice thing about it was that if there was full moon in the night sky, the moonlight helped the workers see well.
      The apple was rotten, and smelled like a rotten apple. This infuriated Bob. He would not stand for having rotten apples rain down upon him during work. Bob grabbed the apple and threw it irately. The apple soared through the air and all the workers stopped to watch. The apple bounced off a mirror into another mirror and bounced off of that one as well. It landed on a table rolling very rapidly towards a stack of neatly stacked phials. The apple knocked into them with a crash and the phials flew this way and that. One certain phial still had a drop of deadly potion in it.
      Mr. Maniac calmly walked into the room. The phial fell and smashed against his stomach spilling that last drop of potion onto him. Mr. Maniac fell to the ground writhing in pain. Smoke bellowed from his ears and nostrils, clouding the air above him in darkness. Bob saw this as his chance to escape, and escape he did.
      Mr. Maniac was never seen again.
      Two years later, Bob had hooked up with a beautiful young woman who had a name, but it was forgotten. They never left the kingdom and raised a family of eleven in a small cottage on the precipice of a large cliff. Eventually the cliff eroded sending the cottage down, down, down into the sunset.


      Comments?

    2. #2
      The Wizard
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      Very clever, it had me smiling the whole way through.

    3. #3
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      Quote Originally Posted by NickKanieval View Post
      Very clever, it had me smiling the whole way through.
      thanks!

    4. #4
      Member CoLd BlooDed's Avatar
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      I was gonna say 'This is very... grade 9,' but then I realized what you were trying to accomplish here and this actually made me laugh outloud a couple times.

      Funny shit man, my kind of humour.


      Starry starry night, paint your pallet blue and gray,
      Look out on a summers day,
      with eyes that know the darkness of my soul.


    5. #5
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      Quote Originally Posted by CoLd BlooDed View Post
      I was gonna say 'This is very... grade 9,' but then I realized what you were trying to accomplish here and this actually made me laugh outloud a couple times.

      Funny shit man, my kind of humour.
      thanks!

      i kinda feel sorry for my teacher though (just a little), she was teaching Spanish until two years ago.

      that would jumble up my head a bit

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