I had first tried lucid dreaming a few years back while living in asia. back then I had made a good bit of progress, getting as far as being able to pick up on cues and execute tests. The problem was that i got too excited and woke up. That was the furthest I got.

my sleep pattern is out of wack and i've been staying up all night and sleeping during the day. sometimes sleeping most of the day (yes i am a little depressed). i took this chance to get back into lucid dreaming but my efforts hadn't been as serious as they were back in asia.

last night i had kind of a scary experience. i hit the hay at 9pm. 30 minutes later i thought i was awake and not being able to sleep. i kept trying to turn on my lights because i had the slight feeling like someone else was in the room. the lights however weren't coming on (this is how i knew i was actually dreaming). my body felt extremely heavy almost as if in sleep paralysis. i gave up on the lights and just try to go to bed then i begin to hear an intense ringing in both ears and i decided to focus on it and try to intensify it further. almost as soon as i let it intensify it quickly rang to disturbing proportions until i heard a loud click.. or felt it in my head and i screamed myself awake. also i've been sweating for no reason. sometimes i wake up with parts of my sheets damp.

i'm wondering if i was in some middle-middle realm between sleep paralysis and actually lucid dreaming. if so i'm wondering how i can overcome the fear and try to intiate a lucid dream or even an OBE.

i understand that sleep paralysis is the realm between waking conscousness and then slipping into sleep or unconsciousness, but i know sleep paralysis and this wasn't sleep paralysis because i could move limbs but it was extremely difficult. also i hesitate to call it a full on dream because i was semi-conscious of my surroundings. given the more time that passed the more altered the surrounding seemed to become.. IE i only have one light beside my bed but after trying to get lights on i started to get desperate and i reached for another light which i thought was there, but actually i didn't have another light next to my bed so its almost like i was conscious but sleeping further and further into a subconscious reality.

recently i've been reading up conspircy theories on aliens etc. lol i don't really take them seriously, but i got the unnerving feeling like maybe i was sleeping into a realm of consciousness that was allow me to perceive an alternate dimension and in this dimension there WERE entities in my room and there WAS something in my head. like an implant or something.

yes i could be losing my mind and perhaps i'm just posting so that someone will realate to this story and tell me to relax so i can go to bed. i'm usually fine with this kind of stuff but something just seemed different. for example when i first experienced sleep paralysis i loved it and thought it was the most interesting thing ever and i kept trying to go into paralysis. but now i'm a little scared. lol

anyways thanks for reading this ridiculous and long post.