Part of what you are saying is true. Indeed thinking that lucid dreaming is easy and effortless gives you confidence that relieves stress that in turn allows you to LD easier. It may also be a "placebo" effect.
There's also such thing as "beginners luck" - starting something new often results in success.

The problem starts when a newbie gains his first LD, then a couple days go by and the confidence disappears, there's a question of "why dont I get all these easy LDs?" So the confidence fails, people try to fake it, ruining the placebo effect so stress build up and things dont work out how they should be.

That's when people come here and complain



About control - a lot of it is up to you, but sometimes it takes many LDs to find a control technique that would work for you. Some people dont have the luxury of having many LDs to test basic control techniques so they use cookies cutter versions