I'm pretty experienced with DEILD. If I understand your post you are having trouble getting the dream to form around you, right? The best thing I've found to do at the point when the dream starts to form is to just relax. Don't think about what is happening or the imagry you see. Just observe. Wait. Stay calm. The dream should sort of blossom around you.

When you are finally in the dream, just hang out for a while and don't do anything. Allow time for the dream to stabilize and for your body to fall deeper into sleep. That way you are less likely to wake yourself up when you start doing stuff.