I had a dream, not really vivid. Then I wake up from that dream (and into what I think is this reality...). In front of me, I see on the wall numerous small strands of hair, aligned perfectly. About 8 inches away from each other. I am surprised. I wonder "wow, is this the subtle energy gunk energy workers talk about? I must be able to see them because of the meditation I did with the azurite. I have to contact her and tell her how powerful it is." I want to move, but I can't, and suddenly I feel dead. A strange emptiness, even though I am fully conscious and can see everything in detail. I think "this is it then? Why? What did I do? Does this have anything to do with it being the 21st?" I want to tell my mother, that it's ok, that I feel more at home in the spirit world than in the physical. But I can't, I try to open my mouth, to cry out "mum." But nothing comes out, but I keep trying. I feel so sad, so scared.
Then I wake up suddenly, whispering "mum."
This happened not even an hour ago. This was not a lucid dream, it felt real, grounded. I felt awake, not dreaming, if I were, wouldn't I be flying? Wouldn't I be able to speak and move however I liked? It felt like some alternate universe or something. However, the thoughts are my own. I had heard about "energy gunk" looking ugly, and I assumed those hairs were that because they were so strange I didn't feel like they belonged to the physical world. Also, I had done a third eye meditation with azurite a week ago, with strange effects.
What I'm trying to say is, I was there, I wasn't a different character, I didn't forget who I was or suspend disbelief like I do in ALL my dreams. I had a lucid dream yesterday, I know the difference. This is something else. It sounds like a false awakening, but it's not...
Anyway, I really don't know what to say but I'd love your thoughts on this. I genuinely thought I had died not even an hour ago...
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