WhyAmINaked

The dream starts with me as the student of an evil samurai -- Kibagami Genjuro, specifically, from the Samurai Shodown series. We are strolling along what I assume are the streets of Edo at night, and there's a light rain. To our left is the base of the castle/wall, and there is a river/moat(?) to the right. We walk under a willow and/or cherry blossom tree (my dream switches them up randomly for funsies) in a small garden patch with a stone lantern, and I recall climbing the tree while Genjuro drinks from a giant bottle of wine.

As we are walking around being all samurai-y, we somehow get invited to a posh, contemporary house by an early 30's, he-likes-football-she-likes-Mimosas type couple. The house is a big, single-story house, and we are in a giant kitchen that has a view of the backyard through the sliding glass doors. We chit-chat a bit on the counters, and the husband takes Genjuro outside to look at his sweet grill.

Dream Knowledge tells me the wife secretly flirts with everyone, and does it precisely because she knows her husband will get insanely jealous. And while her husband and Genjuro are outside, she begins flirting with me and Genjuro (who, by dream logic, is able to be in two places at once?). It's about this time her outfit changes into a set of pretty goddamn slutty workout clothes. I react exactly like Ferris' dad from Ferris Bueller's Day Off when Sloane flirts/messes with him in the cab. Meanwhile, the husband is right by the giant glass sliding door, and would have a clear view of everything if he's not so fixated with the grill.

But then, he calls me to join him outside alone (Genjuro is no longer defying space-time and is now just inside the kitchen now), and there's a creepy vibe about him. I think he knows what's going on, and isn't too happy; but instead, he just talks to me about his grill. He then gives me a tour of his backyard, which is so big that there is are wooden walkways all about. At one end of the walkway, we see a couple of Blue Jays that the couple keeps as pets. He summons one of the birds to him, and for some reason, it's at this time I realize I have an owl friend (who just kinda exists briefly). As I marvel at the bird, the husband turns to me and says, "You know... birds see everything."

I take that as a sign to leave. There are other guests all of a sudden, and they grow exponentially hostile from their sudden existence like dream extras in Inception.

Things kind of escalate from here.

The backyard grows larger, and I'm at the side of the fence. Directly in opposite of me in front of the glass doors is Scorpion from Mortal Kombat, and, yep, he shoots his spear thing at me. I all of a sudden have a katana in my hands, and charge at Scorpion. Suddenly, I'm fighting the entire cast of the evil characters from Mortal Kombat. Well, shit.

I take to the upper terraces of the garden to get away, and suddenly I'm platforming along bamboo platforms supported hundreds of feet above ground, next to mountains that look like it comes out of a Chinese watercolor painting. I'm leaping and hopping hundreds of feet, and I distinctively remember going so fast that I'm very concerned about my landing.

I wake up after a few bounds, confused as fuck what the hell my brain is doing.