memorable

I was an artist. Of more than paint and more than words. I created through raw imagination. I would focus on a canvas and a world would be created inside. My worlds were dark and frightening. My gallary was called "Hell". You could enter through the door but simply opening it was not the way in. Opening the door and stepping through it brought you to just another static gallary of paintings and poetry. You had to make an offering to enter Hell. You dip your fingers in the holy water and instead of crossing yourself you spread the water on the door and listen to it sizzle. Then the veil becomes sheer and Hell can be entered.

I was trapped. Surrounded by fire. My friend--Cordelia?--made it through before the ring was complete. I'd been here before. I could abandon the poem and run through the fire to the other side, to safety. But not this time. This time the poem had to be completed. This time I didn't know I was reading or writing. "I am Milton," I said. "No you're not," pleaded my friend, "Just jump through the fire!" "I can't," I said, "I must complete the poem." The fire drew closer and there was no longer any hope of escape.

In the back of my mind I felt an angel turn its head from God. It tore itself away from the Kingdom and descended upon me. "No," I thought, "Not forever!" but it was too late. The angel took me downward and we descended into Hell.

My very first moments of lucidity in dreamland. Before I went to sleep I repeated to myself, "I'm dreaming." A couple of dreams later, one of my dream characters told me, "You're dreaming!" He said it twice and then I gasped and said, "I'm dreaming!" at which point I had a strange rushing feeling and everything went blank. I was waking up so quickly and I was so taken by surprise I didn't think to spin. When fully awake I almost didn't believe it had happened.

I started my dream log on the 25th of July, so it's been just over a week from my decision to lucid dream to my first successful experience. Considering that I've never had a lucid dream before, even by accident, I consider this enormously encouraging. Thanks, fellow dreamers, for your support.

Important note: Encountered dream cue. Strange things with my hair.


I didn't sleep well. Couldn't remember a single dream. Kept waking up and going back to sleep. Until Phillip went to church. I woke up for a while and when I went back to sleep I had an EPIC dream.

This time I was on a road trip down south with Lloyd and Robby. Most of what I remember is driving back up North. I was using a GPS but I kept making wrong turns so we visited lots of different places, stopping whenever we saw something interesting. Many things happened but there's a particular image I want to preserve.

It's night time and I'm high up on a hill overlooking a city. The city's built on the shore--and the islands--of a vast lake. The lights of the houses wink on and off like a hundred million fireflies or early morning dew on a freshly baled field, and each is reflected in the dark water. I am full of awe and the perfect understanding of why I travel.

Another especially interesting fragment: my subconscious is trying its damndest to hand control over to my conscious mind. In my dream I'd stopped at a hotel and while asleep I'd dreamed about my main dream cue.

In the dream in a dream I'm sitting on a bench outside a strip mall kind of thing. It's very upscale and the windows of the shops are enormous. i'm waiting for someone. Robby, I think. I'm still on the road trip. I dont' know how much of what I remember is the dream in a dream. But I'm certain of this part.

I look in a window and see my reflection. I decide I want no hair on the left half of my head. I take out a razor and begin shaving. It's a pink disposable razor and I'm having trouble. At some point it becomes a brush made of hard plastic spirals. I think instead of shaving it actually pulled hair out. It pulled, anyway, and hurt slightly. I was still having trouble with it and could only manage to make a bald spot on the left front of my head. A girl on a bench across from me commented that I was messing up the color distributions (in the waking world I have dark blond hair and a bleached mohawk) and I explained what I was up to.

Later (back in dream layer one) I was in the car and remembering my dream from the night before. But when I put my hand through my hair the bald spot was STILL THERE. "How could that be?" I thought. I had a brief minor freak out in which I believe I *almost* attained lucidity. Instead I decided I mush have actually pulled my hair out while I was asleep. I'm getting close.

So many scenes and places. Takes so long to write. I've captured the two most important parts so I'll leave things here for now. Perhaps I'll pick up later.