butrflilover

After 911 and the first plane hit i was watching it on the news as I got ready for work. On the way into work i was listening to the radio "Howard Stern" was on reading all of the items needed donated to help rescue all of the people in this tragedy.

I was hearing things like Ace Bandages, bottled H20, power bars, Gatorade, Saline solution, dog food etc. So i was having these thoughts in my head that i was going to go door to door and start asking for donations and deliver them to NYC myself. I started to chuckle out loud and was like "Yea right I am not going to NYC, I have never been there, I have no $, I don't even have a truck to fit anything in"....excuses really.

All of a sudden in my car i was hearing "You will be going", me replying with "No I am not" again "Yes you will" and I'll be damned if I did not walk into my job (Ruby Tuesday's which i was a hostess at and had only worked there 2 weeks) went up to my manager and explained what had happened on my journey to work that morning. I even got a free tattoo just because of what I did.

My manager had totally surprised me and said "Go for it!" If you need to leave now go ahead so I typed up a list of items that were needed for people to donate, took that as a start and walked right over to Wal-Mart across the street and talked to their manager who ended up giving me two $100 gift cards. I kept going and I had people handing me $$ for gas, I went to a local Automobile dealership and he donated $2000 to American Red Cross.

It just kept blossoming from there, I was on the radio, TV stations were talking about it, I had contact U-Haul in Streetsboro, Ohio and spoke to the manager there and told him what i was doing. In our conversation he asked me if i knew someone, I mentioned his wife was my manager. This manager says well her husband is the General Manager of this U-Haul and offered me a truck for free. When I told him I didn't have a clue how i was going to do this because I had never been to NYC he said his Dad worked not too far from NYC and would gladly help me drive there and also brought 2 of his employees. I had went back to work and by then 2 girls I was working with offered to come along too so all 6 of us made the trip 5 days later we left at midnight and arrived at 9am. Now my name is Kelly, the names of the 2 girls offering to join me were Charity and Kelly. Ok maybe a coincidence but wow.

So when we finally arrived to New York as we were driving across the GW Bridge you could still see the smoke rising from the Twin Towers. It was a very Surreal and Somber visit. The whole city was completely QUIET, not at all like the movies or TV. It had hit everyone so hard that even 5 days later everyone was still in shock.

By this time so many people had donated supplies that the whole baseball stadium was full and i kept getting turned away at all of the drop off locations for 3 hours i searched and no luck. I was not going to give up though so i pulled over got out of the vehicle and walked up to a police officer, explained i drove from Ohio and was not going to return with these donations. He then spoke to his Sergeant and immediately removed all of the barricades from blocking a road. He escorted us to the NYPD Police Academy and had all of the cadets search our truck and unload all of our donations. It was the most coolest moment of my life.

They offered all 6 of us cots to rest on, (the same cots all of the fireman, policemen, rescuers etc. rested on) offered us a shower, tooth brush , lunch, even the snipers on top of the roof gave us all a NYPD hat and T-Shirt and thanked us for delivering these donations. I was just taken back by this whole life changing experience that I never would have witnessed if I hadn't listened.

We drove around and toured the area a bit before heading back home By this time the U-haul guys already left and went home but I just couldn't leave I needed to get a feel of this place for a little bit so we stayed. Unfortunately we even could smell the death in the air but I got to meet some wonderful people, people I will never ever forget.

But there is even more wonderful things to say about this whole thing.

3 years later a relative of mine met someone online in NJ, asked me if i would take them there and I did. This was in 2003. When we got there we were so close to NYC that i decided to go back, drive around the area I had gotten to know back then even went back to that NYPD academy. I walked into the doors of the Police department and sitting at the main desk was one of those people I said I wouldn't forget. That same Sergeant was there, He looked up at me and said "Aren't you that girl from Ohio who brought us donations?" I just stood there and cried, he walked over to me and gave me a hug. I even got signatures from the pics i took in 2001 because I brought that album with me.

A little history, My mother was raised basically by her Aunt and Grandmother. I knew only Aunt Dot growing up but she passed away when i was a child in Elementary school. At age 30-31 i had a visit from her. She had told me that I need to make sure that my Mother made it to this years family reunion. I went back and crawled up on my Mother's lap and was just crying to her because it scared me to death. I didn't know if i was going crazy, if it was the drugs i had done in my youth or what. I was a bit freaking out and i told my Mother about this vision. I say vision because i have had many throughout my life.

My Mother had informed me at this time that Her Aunt as well as my Mother had these abilities. These "Special ways" of either knowing something is going to happen or Something has already happened. I had realized my two sisters, my cousin and myself also had these same abilities but never spoken to my Mother about them before this. Now i wasn't sounding so crazy all of a sudden. Well she also had told me that it ran in our family and the 3rd born female had stronger powers or abilities. I am the 3rd daughter.

The odd part about this vision is my Mother was upset with me wanting to bring a male friend with me that she didn't approve of and felt embarrassed by and would not attend this years family reunion if i brought him. I decided after this visit from her Aunt that I needed to stay home so she could go.

I had witnessed my Mother shed many tears over her Aunt passing and how when she had died she had left nothing from her childhood to be given back to her and it had hurt her badly especially the bed she grew up sleeping in.

Anyways, my Mother returned from this reunion. She had returned with about 5 items from my Aunt. One of her favorites is a Rooster cookie jar. She still shows it with pride. Thank you Aunt Dot for making my Mother happy that day.

This dream is a very personal dream to me... It has a lot to do with my past as well as all of my siblings past too. Might take me awhile to get through writing this one all down but i will just take my time.

At this time of my life i had just had my daughter, she was only a few months old and i had an allergic reaction to an anti-depressant that i was prescribed for depression. This depression stemmed from my childhood.

When the ambulance arrived to take me to the ER for dizziness, numb fingertips, spinning room and blackness from the allergic reaction they informed me that 2 hospitals were full and they were taking me to St. Francis and while in the ER they asked if i could be "Pregnant" since they were drawing some blood they wanted to check. Sure enough i was pregnant with our youngest and my daughter was only 6 months old. So not only was i having an allergic reaction, thinking i was depressed but i was pregnant. I wasn't depressed i was hormonal and didn't need these meds anyway.

So i still agreed to go to a hospital for Psychiatric treatment. Still thinking there was something wrong with me because that is what the doctors kept telling me so i wanted to make sure so i went. Ended up staying in a mental hospital 10 days. They couldn't give me any meds because i was pregnant and had to get in touch with my OBGYN so i was completely sober, drug free and able to remember my dreams.

2 nights straight I had the same dream. I was asleep in my bedroom, I was the same age as i was then in 2005. Age 35. While i was asleep a stranger had come to my bedroom door but all i could see was a mans shadow. This shadow kept pulling my body towards it and i was frightened in this dream. I jumped out of bed and held onto the bathroom door, my feet all a sudden floated up and my body was being forced towards this shadow, i held on for dear life until i realized who the shadow was. My oldest brother.

I awoke the next morning in fear of him. I just knew something was wrong and i was determined to figure it all out. I started by calling my other 3 siblings, All of them are older than me. They were 20 (My oldest brother), 18 (sister), 16 (brother) and 14 (sister) when i was born in 1971. I started with the youngest sister because we are the closest and i asked her if she ever had any problems with this older brother sexually assaulting her or acting odd around her, she couldn't remember anything bad. I then moved onto my oldest sister who had some things to tell me. She had informed me that when she was in High school my brothers best friend kept asking her out. She didn't like him but our brother kept telling her to go out with him that he was a nice guy and that she would like him too so she decided to give him a chance, that same guy that begged my sister to go out with him and my brother begged her to do it too ended up raping my sister, come to find out my brother knew all along what this creep was doing which is why he told Kay to go out with him so basically he set up his own sister to get raped.

Well it doesn't end there, next i talked with my other brother. At first when i asked him he said he couldn't remember anything odd or wrong. Then 3 months later his wife called me and said she needed to talk to me and was I sitting down? She proceeded to tell me that my brother who at the time was 50 years old curled up on his couch into a fetal position and confessed that our oldest brother raped and molested him throughout his whole childhood which is why he quit high school to join the army at 16 years old to get away from our oldest brother. I also found out that a cousin and an Uncle of ours also molested him when he was a child. My heart dropped i knew right then and there that God was allowing me to remember not only to help me but to help my brother through a terrible time in his life too. It was then i realized my brother had also raped and molested me I can even figure out what day it happened I just cannot remember the details of the incident which i am very grateful for.

So whether i want to say this was a "Vison from God" or just a "dream" either way it has been able to heal some and hurt others. After some careful consideration i ended up sending this "older" brother an email telling him i figured out everything he had done to us when we were children and that i told our parents and that everyone knew who he was and what he did. I however never received a reply back or a message that the email was "undeliverable" so i have no idea if he really knows that we know what happened but i can tell you this, He sure doesn't act like we know anything.

For those of you wondering.....My father was on what we thought was his deathbed when he had a brain tumor removed. During his visit in the hospital this brother called him. For my father's sake as well as my Mother's i decided to talk to him for the 1st time in over 6 years and allow a "distant" relationship to start, i still have not come eye to eye with this sibling and i am not sure yet how i will react towards him all i know is my heart towards him is not as evil now as it was when i first figured this all out.

I had a dream and i would love to know what it means... In this dream my 7 year old daughter had fallen into a sewage drain and had fallen down pretty far. We were not even in the USA in a strange country when i went for help no one could understand what i needed right away finally i got help, the rescue team couldn't reach her and had to dig into the road and sidewalk to get to her, i was so scared in this dream like it was real. They didn't have hopes of finding her alive, thought she had already drowned. I couldn't bear to turn around as the EMS came up the sidewalk with the stretcher. I turned around frightened of what i would fine and there she was wet, full of debris in her hair and on her body but she was ALIVE!! I woke up shortly after running my fastest up my stairs to my daughters room to make sure it was not a real dream and that she was still alive! Thank God it wasn't real....Oh yea, one thing i forgot to mention is that next morning walking my children to the bus stop there was a construction crew at the end of the street and guess what they were working on??? Rebuilding or updating the drainage ditch.