My Wapped Dreamscape

This whole dream was very dark as if it was all happening at night with no lights on:
I am in my old house where I lived as a teenager, I'm in my bedroom which is situated where the bathroom actually was. Under the bed I find some pornographic magazines and got excited but then hide it under the bed between the matress. I then hear knocking and leave but feel very self concious so go back to better hide the evidence, but now it's a bathroom and can't find anything.

This is a very sketchy dream, more a fragment:

I'm in a car, ask some people tp help me, one person does and I say to him "Aren't you glad you're helping me and not that lot. Then there was something about a cherry clafoutee.

This dream revolves around a young teenager who through the first part I believe to be my child. It is very ambiguous whether this child is a girl or boy and I'm also awaire that there he/she may have a mental or physical disability. He/She is at the end of a long terrace house, but the whole side has bars. I introduce him/her to my mother and sister and consider to tell my mother that she's at last a grandmother and to my sister that she's an aunty. I am awaire that there are people who want to kill him/her, but by the end though I can't remember what I try to do to prevent this, I do know that he/she is not my child. I go back to where he/she was but the place is now empty.

This dream comes in two parts:

I'm in a courtyard area with some else and we're both sweeping up the courtyard and putting rubbish into bin bags, there is a long building on the edge of the courtyard there's a building with several doors, rather like a long stone stable, we're putting the bags into the nearest stable. I'm awaire that one of my bags has split and there's a computer monitor poking out ready to drop.
Next thing I'm awaire of, I'm now the other person, but his younger self as a child. He/I see myself approaching. My other self says something to the lad who then becomes very excited and runs off.

Last nghts dream very sketchy and I can only renember bits and pieces, but what I remember goes as follows:

I remember holding a stack of three bowls and assuring Colette (the friend I live with) that I had already washed them, however, when we separated them the bottom one was encrusted with dried wheetabix residue.

Next I was shuffling along using my elbows as seen in a lot of war movies, in a ditch with several other people with me. I'm not sure if I was supposed to be in a real war but it felt more like I was taking part in a war game.

Lastly I was driving round a block looking for something, not sure what it was, I stopped off at a W.H Smiths type shop which was being run by Jane Asher and a friend, I asked for a cigarette and was given one. I think I may have gone round a few times looking for something, but remember stopping again at Janes shop to ask for something. This time the shop had grills down and was being shut up for the night and she and her friend didn't look pleased at my interuption.

I remember crawling about a grassy area, a dip on a hill with a wall around it and investigating the mystery about where this place is for Gene Hunt and Alex . After a while, I stand up and I'm able to confirm that where we are is not in the land of the living, she walks off and Gene raises his arms in exasperation which knocks a small rectangular object from mey hand, and he too wonders off. I get back on my hands and knees looking for this object as I know it's the only way I can get home, as I'm searching arround a shallow well someone says that there's someone in the well drowning. I look in the well and under the dirty water with fag ends floating on the top, there is a woman with black curly hair staring straight ahead. I turn to the person who'd said this and said "Don't worry, she doesn't know where she is"

This occured when I was 4, staying in France with my grandparents. The only bit I remember went as follows:

I was outside somewhere with a few friends.I had a water hose to my mouth and was drinking the water when suddenly a live fish comes out and before I knew it I had swallowed it. I could feel it in my throat as I woke up screeming.

Explaining this to my grandperents who couldn't speek English was difficult, the nearest I was able to come was "Pictures in my head when I sleep" it was then that I learned the word cauchemar and was told by my grandmother that it was because that night had been a black moon night.

At thw moment I'm just concerned with remembering my dreams, so was quite happy to have had this one:

I was in a room (changing room?) taking off my clothes and socks, had been told at last minute I was being entered onto a swimming race. Next thing I remember was walking around the indoor public pool considering my options. I decided diving into the shallow end would not be a good idea as it was only a foot deep, but the deep end had a nice high diving board which could give me the edge. I went into the pool half way between the two ends and practiced swimming the width under water, I reasoned that it wouls add another edge to winning as the other competitors wouldn't know where I was. I then started practicing swimming the length under water when I woke up.

I can't remember the beginning of this dream, but what I do remember goes as follows:

I was in a house in the front room witth two other people, the one directly in front of me was the one I was doing admin work for, we were chatting though I don't know what about, but I do know I was assuring him that I would help him out.
Next thing I remember, I was in an upstairs bedroom. I used a conveniently placed pylon to climb down. Outside it was almost dark and it was Gainsborough Road where I lived as a child. I walk away trying not to be seen by anyone in the house and heading for my car which I knew was far away.

This dream is a very sketchy one as lately I've been waking up with the dream dissapearing before I can get any of it down:

The first thing I can remember was being on the top deck of a bus with a friend beside me (don't know who it was, I just had the knowledge that this person beside me was a friend), I was looking through a medical book on diseases as in this dream I knew I was suffering from something and knew what it was (though I can no longer remember what it was supposed to be). I remember opening up one page which was about the treatment of someone with the back of his scull off and his brain growing out of the back of his head, at this point the page became fully animated with the patient looking up at me with sadness in his eyes as a meat slicer was used to pear down the excess brain.

This dream is another one that happened many years ago:

I dreamed that I got out of bed and went to the loo, it was only in the loo when I tried to turn on the lights and it remained dark that I realised I was dreaming, at which point I woke up. I needed the toilet anyway so once again the same thing played out and again when the light stayed off I realised that I was still dreaming and woke up. This time I got out of bed, and instead went downstairs in the dark and into the kitchen, I could feel the carpet under my feet and see the room, furniture and everything as I normally do when I walk about with no lights on. I went into the kitchen and tried the lights there, again there was no change. I was just about to go outside and wondering if I should put some shoes on when I woke up for real.

This dream happened about 10 years ago and went as follows:

I was walking down the residential road I used to live as a teenager and with me was my old school friend Kevin. We crossed the main road to go to the 'Fish & Chip' shop, but as we approached, I saw two people comming out eating their meal from a newspaper and saying "Budgy and Chips, mmmmm, mmm". It was at this point that everything struck me as strange and I realised that I was dreaming, (I didn't do any tests, at this time of my life I knew about lucid dreams, but not to such a great extent). I noticed a pretty young woman a few yards away and thought to myself "I wonder what would happen if I tried to make love to a dream character", I approached her, put my arms around her and immediately woke up saying "Oh, so that's what happens".

With what I know now, I'm still not 100% sure if this wake up was a true or false awakening.

I vaguely remember something about Matt Smith, but not sure if it was Matt as himself or Matt as The Doctor.
Becomes vivid as I am standing on the beach with about a dozen other people beside me, being given a talk by an official. Though there is no overhead projector around, the presentation is an old fashioned projection presentation, I’m not paying much attention to it anyway but as his talk comes to an end, the presentation is now being done using a flip chart. One over, I’m walking across the beach with my parents and sister, on my right there are rocks with cafes and hotels behind, the rocks curve round towards the sea which has now come in blocking the route to the hotel we would be staying at.

As I was droppng off to sleep on a couple of occasions, I had the following hypnogogic snippets (not saying images as they were moving but just lasted a second or two before I woke up), which were very vivid.

Hypnogogic 01: Woman, blond hair, cut off jeans and light blue tee shirt shinning up a coconut tree, this is viewed from the base of the tree looking up.

Hypnogogic 02: A woman as pinoccio, not as cute as this sounds as it wasn’t a cartoon image but a very vivid real image, the wood was a light coloured wood heavily varnished but the eyes were real, deep brown and frantically looking from side to side.

Hypnogogic 03: A woman with long blod hair and a red mac walking along a path up a mountain. Viewed from slightly below looking up.

Walking along a pavement with a mound running alongside the pavement to my right and a few shops to my left. Looked into one of the shops, a newsagents, and saw on the magazine rack a magazine with a picture of spiderman on the front cover. Further on down the road in a park, I realised that I too had superpowers and as three men ran towards me, I turned round to blow a hurricane force fart at them causing the turf to come away from the ground and cover them like cream in a Swiss roll.