DreamSwimmer

Such a boring LD. I WILD onto some city and resolve to keep the thought that I am dreaming in my mind. Needless to say, I soon forget all about that. I try and fly, but it doesn't work. I hold up a car (GTA style) and consider stealing it. Then I reconsider and ask a pedestrian if she can 'teach me to fly' or know anyone who can.

Some blonde woman replies brightly "Sure!"

Then she pisses me off by telling me the names of actual flying instructors (i.e. plane). I consider slaying her, but in the end let her go.

I WILD onto a night scene. Everything is unsteady as usual, and I hold onto a iron barrier to steady myself. I try to fly up but it doesn't work. I just end up jumping. I pause for a second wondering what happened. I try again, but nothing. I then try to phase through a fence but end up just hurting my head. Everything looks so real that I force myself to do several RC's. It's extremely hard to remember that this is a dream. Like all WILD's its exactly like real life. I admit I sulk a little bit and skulk around for a bit.

I see an interesting looking car, from what looks like the 50's, in someone's driveway. I steal it. The sound of the car is glorious, like the purr of a tiger high on potatoes. It is an earthy roar, and I soon forget about flying. Then I run over a schoolgirl. Well shit, I think as I see a puddle of torn flesh and bone in my rear mirror. She couldn't be more than 6. I feel guilty for a few seconds. Then, my bloodlust rises, as I see a mob behind me. I summon a baseball bat and rush to do battle.

The mob is fighting each other, but I soon join in. Unfortunately my bloodlust is not sated as my bat bounces off everyone. Luckily their bat does the same.

I WILDED out of bed and teleported to another universe. I found myself in a futuristic office space. There were a lot of people there. Unfortunately I didn't stabilise my dream. I found myself talking to a DC, before I found that she looked rather hideous. Then I stopped talking to it. I wondered the office for a while, before I remembered to do one of my personal tasks-summon the Double Penetrating Unkempt Harold

I did that and went to pick it up. Unfortunately, I just managed to kick it under a shelf. I went around to retrieve it, but the dream ended on me.

I was waiting in line for some food. It was moving really slowly. The man in front of me had turned back and had been talking to me for quite a while. He looked to be an old fashioned fellow, with one of those monocle-type glasses, and a suit with a waistcoat. He stank.

"So what do you think of garlic?"

"I think you consume entirely too much of it."

"Yes, but in a philosophical sense...garlic feeds into the eternal well being of the ego, and our place in the macrocosm of the Universe! It is what killed the dinosaurs and gave birth to the glorious Order Mammalia! [can't recall the rest, but he was talking out of his arse.]

I rolled my eyes and just waited patiently. Eventually my turn came. As much I hated to admit it, the talk of garlic had actually set my appetite going, and I was starving.

"Chicken Kiev please"

"Right...That'll be £185 please."

I was shocked. Everyone was staring at me and I could only stutter. I didn't have that kind of money! I did a RC just to make sure this wasn't real and when it passed I became quite annoyed. I immediately kicked the garlic guy in the balls. He squealed and fell to the floor. Then I went to the side and tried to look for the £185 I needed. I was really hungry. Eventually I just stole the money from the other customers (especially Mr. Garlic) and ordered the chicken. The dream ended before I could eat it however.

I WILDED and pushed the blankets off my body. They were really heavy, and it was a struggle to get out of bed. The fact that I keep WILDING into my bedroom really bums me out. I stumbled around and as usual the dream was very unstable. It took a few seconds to gain some kind of resemblance to normality. It was very dark, but I felt like flying. I ran headfirst into the wall, hoping to phase through, but it didn't work and I fell back on my arse. The nice carpet on my bedroom had turned into a wooded floor and now my arse was killing me. My head was somehow alright. I got up gingerly and gave the wall a baleful stare. I didn't understand why I could phase through the wall sometimes but not others.

I decided to try again. I ran again and this time got through but found that the outside was not at all where I wanted to be. It was an old peoples home! I teleported out of there and ended up in my old house. It was empty. I decided to practice my fireballs, as I hadn't had any success last time. I saw a cool looking totem statue and decided to use it as my target. This time I pretended I could actually feel the heat in my hands and surprisingly when I looked there was fire! I had summoned an element!

I hurled it at the statue who was awash with flame. It stood there and...wasn't consumed to ash. I felt a bit dispirited to be honest, and just wandered around the rest of the house. If I couldn't even destroy a small statue, how would I be able to destroy that cretinous dream character from last time? Next time I think I will up the heat before firing it.

I WILDED and blearily got out of my bed. The dream was extremely unstable so I leaned against the wall and waited for it to calm down. Once it did I phased through my bedroom wall and emerged into my garden. I started to fly straight upwards. I had the intention of reaching space. Unfortunately after around 1000 metres I stalled and couldn't get higher. I tried harder, but the dream itself started to crumble. It was obvious I didn't have enough experience to go higher.

So I let myself fall. I smacked into the ground, back in my garden. Interestingly the garden was not the same one I had launched from. It was my childhood home. I decided to stop messing around and tried to get some points for team Werewolves. Something I had been wanting to try was fireballs. I left my house and headed onto the street. I took a badass pose and tensed my right arm 'feeling' the heat of the fire. Then I swung my arm at the nearest dream character, unleashing my wrath.

Unfortunately it didn't work. The only thing that happened was that my hand turned yellow. The DC looked at me like I was weird, and I suddenly felt foolish. I pretending I was waving at him and tried again to roast him when his back was turned. Unfortunately I was standing on the road and was hit by a garbage truck, which slammed into my back. It didn't even stop and I was lying on my back. I heard the dream character say: "Goddamn fool!"

The dream ended. But I'll be back.

I LD'd via WILD and stumbled around in my room for a few seconds, snorting like a horse with my nose plugged, just to check. It passed and I exited my room. I didn't attempt anything too exotic this time and simply walked downstairs, as there seemed to be a party of some kind. I met my grandma on the way downstairs. I entered the kitchen and found numerous family members. I made a beeline to the kitchen table and started eating. I saw a glass of what looked like whisky and eagerly drank it. Unfortunately, it wasn't whisky but ginger-beer flavoured tea. The thought then struck me that I hadn't actually remembered to stabilise the dream. I had just rushed off like an excited kid to the party downstairs. I tried to stabilise the dream, but it was too late.

As I felt the dream ending, I desperately tried to finish the ginger tea drink, as it was really quite nice.