oslo

i was at a school halloween party and i was hanging out with Dionne for a bit and then Dakotah and i pulled a baggy of cheetos out of my purse and we were eating them and some stpid kids walks over and is ell "how much?" and Dakotah says "fifteen a gram" and i look over at him like what??? and he's just like "shh" and we sell our cheetos and then laugh while this stupid kid pretends to be high...
dumbass.

the dream really isn't the important part of this post.
i am slightly aware that i am dreaming during the dream but i don't do a reality check until the dream is ever and everything is dark. i do the nose plug reality check, i am dreaming. i want to make sure so i move my arms and do the finger-through-palm reality check. it works too. everything is still dark. i slowly start to feel myself under the blanket end then i am awake
this has happened more than once.

Freddy had a job interview somewhere far away (a few hours) and asked me to go with him for the drive. we were taking his dad's truck because his car is broken. we got pulled over by Dewey police officers, women, because the tag didn't have a bar code on it. one of them asked me for my I.D. and i didn't want her to know i was underage so i told her i didn't have one.
"why don't you have one?"
"because i don't drive."
"why don't you drive?"
"i don't believe in it."
"oh, okay. i can respect that."
for some reason they searched the car and found some illegal substances and were now arresting us for that, too. one woman had short, thick, black hair and the other had long blonde hair. there was a child with them. i think she belonged to the blonde woman. i had left my purse in the truck and made them turn around so i could get it. once i was back in the police car i took out my cell phone and started calling my mom. one of the women told me to give her my phone "i have to call my fucking mom" was my response. then i woke up very suddenly.

my boyfriend and i were moving into a house together. we kept our tooth brushes in a closet. i remember telling him (after we had already moved in) that i was excited to live with him. we took in these children, i had no idea where they came from. i guess i hadn't told my mother i was moving out and was afraid she would ground me if she found out so a former teacher agreed to let me stay with her until my mother was calm or something....?

i went to an MHS band concert and my friend Kaitlyn was conducting the first song. for some reason i'd brought my pillow and blanket. the song was 'Row Row Row Your Boat' and Kaitlyn sang it. whenever she was done she stepped back into the band and picked up a banjo. someone else was conducting now. i don't remember any music this time but then it was over and it was time to leave. i had my blanket but someone had stolen my pillow. i took it back from the man who had stolen it and then i left.

i went to a party that lasted three days but i didn't remember any of it. from what the other partygoers told me, i got around. and i got a tattoo. it was a cheetah on my back. my mom came and picked me up and was just like, "whatever"

i'm going to an Eminem concert with Dillonj and Randall. the concert is on the third floor of a bank. the first floor is a normal bank. the second floor is a party type thing. a buncha middle aged women in gowns smoking and putting on makeup. Allie is there. me and Dillon have been talking about Jo and Freddy. we finally make it to the third floor. Eminem is fat and gross with nasty looking facial hair and a beer belly. plus he can't rap. Dillon and i decided to leave but Randall wanted to stay, which wasn't surprising.

this dream is from a loong time ago, i just remembered it.

i'm in a church van on my way to camp at GLBA. we're almost there but up ahead the road runs stright into a pond. to my left there are three or four cabins. i'm sitting next to this kid James from school and he shows me this poem in a book. the poem is about death and i don't remember exactly what it said but i think it was about the beauty in death. now i'm out of the van and James and i are sitting between two of the earlier cabins inside a pin where there is a goat. we go inside the cabin and it is broken and destroyed, everything burned except for this mirror. a full body mirror and in it i don't see myself, i see Satan. we decide to pour gasoline on everything especially the mirror and set the cabin on fire. we're sitting in the field with the goat watching everything burn. the mirror doesn't burn. we bury it to the best of our abilities and go once again to sit in the field. and at the exact moment that the goats lays it's head in my lap the mirror starts to rise out of the ground. i think the goat was telling me to accept my fate.

i'm grounded but everyone left and i'm at home alone. i leave and there is snow on the ground and i'm walking somewhere near Rotary Park with Jon (ex boyfriend) trying to be sociable, friendly. he keeps trying to hold my hand and tell me he loves me and i'm just like, "Jon, no."
he is really pissing me off.
then James (youth minister) pulls up in the church van with all the stupid kids from my church and is like "get in, Mallory" so whatever, i get in. i know he'll mention something to my mom about seeing me and i figure i'll be in less trouble if i'm with church people. so anyway, James is trying to get me to go with him and the kids on this trip that's going to take all day and i'm just like "no, i don't want to go" and he is stubborn and ignoring me. he keeps driving and everyone is pissing me off.

i don't remember how the dream ended but i'm really glad it did.

i'm standing in my laundry room with Dakotah and out of nowhere i say "i'm dreaming" so i do a reality check and i am dreaming. but i'm not asleep enough and i can't make anything happen.
i wake up soon thereafter.

i'm on my way to Cedar Falls a made up town and i was going there because of a book i had read. the book was actually The Catcher In The Rye but for some reason it was called Cedar Falls in the dream. i am almost there and it hasn't been a short trip, i've been driving for almost a week and sleeping in my car and i had been staying in one town just outside of Cedar Falls and i was eating in a diner and four other strangers were there but they were all on their way to Cedar Falls because that's a popular thing i guess. anyway then this person i know named Freddy came in to work and i was like, 'how are you working here, i just saw you before you left?' and he said, 'i'm just working here today.' then there was this house. i never had to get inside the house, but there were three times i had to get out of it. it was surrounded by water, like it was sitting in the middle of a pool and the front step was level with the water. the water never moved. there was algae everywhere and four awkwardly shaped floating ice chunks like in the antarctic and the only way to get out of the pool was to jump from chunk ti chunk. they were wobbly. so i was with these four people from the diner inside the house and they all want first and then i went, and this happened three times, and i went last and i always fell in. the water was warm. the people i was with acted like i should have been really upset for falling in the water but i really didn't mind. i did back flips and played around and i could breathe under water (which didn't strike me as odd) and when i got out i was dry (which again didn't strike me as odd) and then i woke up.

by Robert Frost.. not Trojan.

there's one main room upstairs it's big and i think i remember a king-like figure sitting on his thrown directing people to the smaller rooms. very symmetrical. the two smaller rooms were downstairs i was sent to "hell" the room on the left where i shoveled coal into a huge furnace. i never actually saw the room on the right but i have a feeling it was "heaven"

i don't think anything will happen...
but i'm hoping.
i've been doing reality checks.